Dont Forget to Remember Me
by playingmakebelieve
Summary: Lorelai is in an accident that sends her back to 1984. Post partings. L/L.
1. Choices

Choices

Life is all about choices. He'd chosen to keep her at a distance. He'd chosen not to marry her. She'd chosen to sleep with her ex. And they'd chosen to end their 'match made in heaven' relationship. Today was no different for her, still all about making choices. When the alarm clock went off she chose to get up as opposed to staying in bed like she really wanted. When she got up there was a decision to make over what to wear. She could get all dressed up like she would on any normal day but today just doesn't feel like a normal day. She pulls on some old faded jeans that have paint stains on them that _used _to be too loose, a pink tank top, and a Yale sweat shirt over that. She chooses tennis shoes over heels. Instead of straightening or curling her hair she pulls it back into a loose ponytail, and brushes her teeth. No make-up. She just doesn't feel like being pretty today.

It's been weeks, but the days all seem to be running together now. She makes sure to check what day it is on her cell phone as she climbs into her jeep. August 23rd, how can summer already be over? she wonders.

She drives down the road with nowhere in particular to go. She just can't spend another day in her empty house. She could go to work, but she is off today and has no real desire to go in anyway. She drives past Luke's but doesn't even turn her head in its direction. There's too much to think about. She keeps driving, out of the town square, out of Stars Hollow, out of Connecticut. She is running on nothing. No food, not even one drop of coffee, a luxury that she had been without for a little over a month now. Where her morning cup would be sits the bottle of Sprite she grabbed on her way out. It keeps her stomach settled.

She is now living the world's biggest lie. Keeping a secret from those she loves most… keeping a secret from everyone, hiding her lies as well as she can. Keeping these things from Emily and Richard, Sookie, and Christopher, that is one thing. Hiding it from the rest of the world, especially the entire town of Stars Hollow is another thing entirely. It's a hard, tedious, full time job, keeping a secret this big. Especially from her best friend, Rory. She just doesn't know how to tell her what she allowed to happen. She is gaining weight fast. Faster than she did with Rory, but hiding her weight under big jackets and baggy clothes is the easy part. It's the sneaking around that is hard.

She has to though. She needs time to get used to the idea herself before she pulls anyone else into her private world. She has no idea where she's going, but the open road seems to stretch out far enough for her to go anywhere. Her cell phone rings but she chooses to let it go to voice mail and then turns it off. She doesn't want to talk to anyone.

It's still warm for August so she pulls her sweatshirt over her head and throws it in the passenger seat beside her. She remembers back to over a year ago when things were good, and that man, who's name she can't remember at this particular moment, wanted to buy her Inn and give her a job at his company. A job with an office, a job where she could travel just like she'd always wanted too. Luke got so freaked out. She remembers the panic in his voice. "What about the kids," he'd asked her. She could almost laugh at the irony of it now, if she felt like laughing. No, now it was taking every bit of composure she had not to burst into tears at any given moment. When she was around other people, like at her parents weekly dinner for example or at work, she was able to keep herself tied together with a smile but when she went back to the emptiness of her quiet house; that was when she felt like she was coming undone.

She didn't want to think anymore, she just wanted to drive so she cut on the radio to drown out her head's insufferable rambling. The current station is static, so she turns to dial for something a little more clear. The first station she lands on is playing Nick Lachey's _What's Left Of Me _and it's just her luck that song is just beginning. She sighs and lets it play for a few seconds until the words to the song become just as hurtful to listen to as her own thoughts. The next few stations don't offer anything better. It seems that every genre has its way of saying screw you Lorelai Gilmore from _Lips of an Angel_ by Hinder to _What Hurts the Most_ by Rascal Flats to _Say Goodbye_ by Chris Brown. By the time she finds _So Sick _by NeYo she is too frustrated to try anymore.

"God Dammit!" she cries slamming her hand onto the button, turning off the radio completely. She has absolutely no where to go but she also has no desire to stop so she glances up at a sign over her head and realizes that she is in New York. She pushes her foot down picking up speed as her mind drifts to turning around. Going back isn't an option, she tells herself, so she keeps driving for hours and hours only stopping to get gas when she needs to. She drives straight down the coast. When she reaches Virginia she pops in her favorite Bangles CD, the one band that could never let her down and sets it to repeat. For 17 hours she drives, from her home in Stars Hollow, CT to some town right outside Jacksonville, FL. It's a little after 1:00 a.m. and she knows that she can't hold her eyes open long enough to drive any farther, so she chooses to pull into a what looks like a cheap hotel and gets out of the car. As she walks through the parking lot she can smell the salt water in the air. She just hopes that there is a room available.

The first thing she notices is that this hotel is part of a chain, which already sets it apart from her charming little Inn. This is not charming at all. The second thing she notices is the young girl sitting behind the counter with curly blonde hair. She doesn't see Lorelai, however because she is so engrossed in the magazine that she is reading, she can't be older than nineteen. It makes Lorelai think about herself at that age. She doesn't want to stand there all night so she clears her throat catching the girl's attention.

"Oh I'm sorry didn't see you there," the girl says. "Welcome to the Holiday Inn, can I interest you in a room?" she asks with a smile. This young lady makes up for all the personality her place of employment lacks and it makes Lorelai smile.

"Yes," she replies simply.

"Okie dokie," the girl says going over to her computer. She types something in while Lorelai goes into her purse for her credit card and ID. She hands them over when the girl looks up.

"Lorelai Gilmore," she says looking at her driver's license. "Where have I heard that name before?"

"No idea," Lorelai sighs in exhaustion.

"Wow, did you drive here?" she asks. Lorelai nods. "All the way from Connecticut?"

"That's right." She yawns.

"Cool," the girl exaggerates. "Any particular reason?"

"Nope," she lies.

"I can't wait to get my own car, so I can just drive anywhere I want for any reason or no reason at all." The girl laughs. "Well here you go," she says handing over her credit card, driver's license, and room key all at once. Lorelai takes them and thanks the girl before turning to walk away. "Hey wait I know where I have heard that name before. You were in that magazine," The girl bends down a pulls out a magazine from under the counter. "You own the Dragonfly." She says as she flips to the page. "Right?"

Lorelai nods. "Yes,"

"Very cool,"

"Thank you," Lorelai says simply before walking away.

"Enjoy your stay," the hyper teenager calls behind her.

Lorelai takes the elevator to the second floor and finds her room at the end of the hall. She slides her key car into its slot and watches the red light turn to green, granting her total access to the room she paid for. It's clean and she needs to sleep so she takes off her jeans and climbs into the big soft plushy bed after sticking the do not disturb sign on the knob. She must have been truly fatigued as she is most of the time because she falls asleep practically the moment her head hits the pillow.

The combination of nausea and hunger wakes her up. She looks at the clock beside her bed and groans, telling herself that she really needs to get up, she needs to eat, but she has no energy. She grabs her phone, from beside the bed and turns it back on as all the things she let herself forget flood back into her mind. She groans again and presses the number 1 on the keypad, which takes her directly to her voicemail.

"You have…twenty three…new messages," the robotic woman informs her. She sighs and presses the number 1 again so she can listen to her mother yell at her for missing dinner.

"Message received, August 23, 2006 at 9:45 a.m.," the robotic woman reads.

"Hey Mom, it's me, just calling to check on you. You sounded really sick last night. I think we should take a break from Al's for awhile. Anyway call me later."

"Message received," the robotic repeats, "August 23, 2006 at 10:30 a.m."

"Mom, it's me again I'm going to go hang out with Lane for a while, so I'll just meet you at Grandma and Grandpa's for dinner tonight."

Lorelai puts the phone on speaker as the woman with the electronic voice tells her next message was received at 10:45.

"Hey girly, it's Sookie. Rory told me you weren't feeling well and probably sleeping in, so I just wanted to tell you to call me if you need to talk. Love ya, bye."

Lorelai felt a little bad, she probably should have called someone when she reached the point of no return.

"Message received, August 23, 2006 at 1:05 p.m."

"Hey Lore, your Mom invited me and Gigi to dinner with you and Rory tonight, I just wanted to let you know, okay, see you there."

She mentally added Christopher to the list of people she was going to have to call.

The next two were business calls that she had no aspiration to return right now. After that the messages were all after 8 o'clock that night. Each was more panic-filled than the last and begged for a return call. Rory, Sookie, Emily, Chris, Babette, Miss Patty, more Rory, Logan even, and she had no idea how he got her phone number. She listened to each and every one and finally came to the end.

"Message received August 25, 2006 at 11:52 a.m."

"Lorelai, It's Luke," she inhales a sharp breath. "Everyone around here is going out their mind because no one knows where you are. Rory is hysterical and you are the only person who can calm her down and…" she notes how broken his voice sounds. "Please, just come back, or call someone. Call me. Just let someone know that you're safe. Please." She hears a click on the other end, which means he hung up the phone. After a second she lets out the breath she was holding unsure of whom to call first.

She checks the date on her phone again unable to believe that she slept through an entire day. She chooses the number 2 on her speed dial. "Mommy!" she hears after one ring.

"Hey Sweets," she replies weakly.

"Where are you?" her daughter demands. "You didn't come to dinner, you didn't come home, it's been two days, I was so worried, are you okay?"

"Rory," she starts.

"Everyone is freaking out," Rory continues to rant. Lorelai waits for her daughter to stop talking before she tries to speak again. "Where are you?" she asks again.

Lorelai pauses for a second before answering. "I don't exactly know," she mutters trying to remember.

"What does that mean?" Rory yells getting upset.

Lorelai sighs, she didn't call to get yelled at although she did expect it. "I'm fine, I'll be home tomorrow," she knows her voice is a little hoarse because just woke up, so she speaks softly so that she doesn't wear it out.

"Mom!" Rory yells. "Please don't hang up," she begs.

"I won't," Lorelai says closing her eyes. "I promise."

After a few seconds of silence Rory speaks, "Grandma wants to talk to you."

"Of course she does," Lorelai replies mumbling into her pillow.

"Lorelai Gilmore, after everything you have put us through over the years, this has got to be by far the worst, most inconsiderate-" Emily says taking over Rory's ranting. Lorelai removes the phone from her ear for a few seconds so that Emily can get it all out of her system. "Rude!" is all she hears when she puts the phone back to her ear.

"I'm sorry, Mom," she tells her. "I lost track of time."

"No, Lorelai, being late for a business meeting, that's losing track of time. Forgetting about a hair appointment, that's losing track of time. But disappearing for two days, that is being insensitive, uncaring, and rude."

"Okay, Mom," Lorelai says as she reaches over to the lamp beside her bed and cuts it on. The light makes her squint as they try to adjust. "Look, I have to go."

"Don't think we are finished discussing this, young lady!"

"Yeah Mom, I know, you're really going to give it to me when I get home. Whatever, just please put Rory back on the phone." She throws back the blankets and stands up.

"Hi," Rory says sadly.

"I'm going to go now," she informs her daughter. "I don't know exactly where I am but I am at a Holiday Inn in Florida, however I don't think that narrows it down at all. I didn't mean to scare you, but I'm begging you to please call off the search party. I'm fine and I will see you tomorrow."

"Okay," Rory says.

"Okay, I'll call you when I get to North Carolina."

"Promise?" Rory asks in a way that makes her 21 year old voice sound 7.

"I promise."

"I love you, Mom."

"I love you, more."

"Bye."

"Bye-bye hun."

She hangs up the phone and falls back on the bed realizing what a long day this is going to be. If she wasn't deplorable before, she certainly is now. She presses the number 3, on her phone wondering why she never got around to deleting it.

"Hello?" a woman answers, it takes Lorelai a second to realize that it isn't a woman it's a child. A little girl. It's April.

Lorelai clears her throat. "Hi, um April, is Luke around?"

"Yeah, sure, hold on one second," she says. "Luke!"

A few seconds later a familiar gruff voice comes to the phone. "Lorelai?" he asks quickly.

"You asked me to call."

"Where the hell have you been?" he asks truly worried.

"What's it to you?" Lorelai asks wondering herself why she called him. It would have gotten around to him eventually that she is fine. He doesn't say anything so she chooses to fill the silence herself. "I'm pregnant," she says. Again nothing, she sighs. "Yes, it's yours but don't worry, Luke. This doesn't change anything." Another silent moment passes. "I have to go now," she hangs up before he has the chance to say goodbye. She puts the phone down deciding to make more calls from the road and jumps in the shower, after spending a significant amount of time throwing up.

When she gets her clothes back on, she grabs her purse, her phone, and her keys and heads out. She checks out at the front desk, sorry to see that the man working isn't the same chipper teenager she encountered when she checked in.

Lorelai gets in her car and stops to eat. The kid isn't even born yet and I am already neglecting it, she thinks to herself. After she eats two Big Macs, which she knows in her gut she will regret eating later, she gets back in her car and prepares to drive back up the coast. She calls Sookie, and Chris, and Babette, and everyone else who cared enough to voice their concern to her answering machine. She even calls Logan.

She gets to North Carolina by 10 o'clock and dials Rory again.

"Hello?" Rory answers. From her tone Lorelai can tell that she is still a little irritated.

"I'm in North Carolina."

"Wow," Rory comments.

"What?"

"You've got a long way to go."

"I know, but I am going to drive through the night and I should be back around 10 or 11 in the morning," she says hoping she got her time right.

"Okay," Rory says. "I'll be here."

"Good, I missed you," Lorelai reveals.

"I missed you too,"

"Alright, go to sleep, you go back to Yale next week and you need to be well rested."

"Yes ma'am," Rory salutes.

They hang up, and as promised Lorelai drives through the night and the rain shower that has taken over New England. She finds that her road trip isn't as much fun the second time, but at least the radio is a little more bearable.

Pounding rain and rapid winds is a deadly combination, especially in the darkest hours of the night on the interstate. Most of the people on the road tonight are getting ahead start on their day Lorelai thinks. She turns off the radio, there is nothing but static playing anyway. The noise is distracting her from watching the road, but it is only one of the things keeping her sidetracked. Being on the road alone all this time has given her the chance to think about the baby she is carrying. She has been avoiding thinking about it for the last two months. Covering it up and pretending not to notice as her stomach stretches. She goes to the doctor and takes her medication and does everything that the doctor tells her to do. She even gave up drinking coffee but she can't bring herself to get attached to her baby yet.

Even after she found out she was pregnant dating Christopher still seemed perfect. She was lonely, he is Rory's father, and he loves her but he's not Luke. She missed him, and no matter how hard she tried to forget and fill her time with working she knew she just wasn't herself without him. He was the other half she needed to survive. She realized on this little trip that no matter how busy she is or how many people she fools she is nothing without him. She just wishes that she'd have told him on the phone. She doesn't want to raise their baby without him.

She hates herself for leaving; it was stupid and irresponsible, a mistake she would have to spend some time rectifying. She was just so tired of her everyday life. She would wake up empty and go to bed as lifeless as a ghost. It isn't like her, but that is what she was without him, a ghost, whose dreams were haunted with the memory of what she let go of. Her days are filled with regretting the choices she made.

As the rain gets harder the memories became more vivid. She tries to remember how much fun she had with Rory when she was a baby. She was single then too, and she did it all on her own. She raised the perfect daughter. The lonely nights were a small sacrifice but she got back to dating eventually. She tries to tell herself that it'll be exactly the same, she can do it again but there is that voice in the back of her head reminding her how old she is. Telling her that no matter how hard she tries to find it, true love just isn't for her.

She tells herself that she is being immature and that this baby will be a wonderful experience. She loves being a mom to Rory and she'll love being a mom to this child too. She tells herself that things are finally going to change. She makes another choice. She is going to tell everyone about the baby as soon as she gets back.

She just hopes everything will work out.

Tires screeching against wet cement interrupt her thoughts; it then changes from the slick sliding sound to the sound of metal slamming into metal. She can see an 18-wheeler up ahead. It falls on its side and skids upward. The three cars in front of her collide trying to avoid it. She quickly hits the brakes but it's too late. Her car spins out on to the road. She hears something explode and the shattering of glass. Everything is moving so fast but so slow at the same time. Her car slams into the others. She feels her body break through the glass windshield before the car completely flips. She hears her bones crack as she hits the ground. It doesn't hurt at first, but as the rain falls onto her skin so does the intense sting. She soon becomes oblivious to everything around her. She can't move. She can't think. She can't breathe. Everything goes white then black then white again. Voices faded in and out. She tries to stay conscious but the pain becomes too intense. She opens her eyes to chaos and uproar people screaming and crying. She doesn't want to die she has too much to live for. She thinks about her baby and clings to her abdomen as she strains to hang on, but as quickly as she went from her car to the cold wet interstate highway, she lets go.

**Please Review. ;) **


	2. Words

Words

"There's been an accident," Those could possibly be the four most terrifying words she's ever heard in her entire life and she knows a lot of words. How can she not? Words are the way she expresses herself, and they always have been. She adores reading words in books and listening to the words of her brilliant professors at Yale. She appreciates good dialogue on television and she'd learned from the best how to use the most appropriate words in any given situation. There has hardly ever been a time when Rory Gilmore was at a loss for words, until right now.

Hospitals are never fun places to be. Rory thinks back to her past experience with hospitals. She got sick once when she was little, there was the time she fractured her wrist, when her little sister was born, her grandfathers heart attack, and most recently she'd spent every waking moment in the hospital with Logan after his accident. However all of those experiences in places like this seem trivial compared to this one. Her attention is drawn to her grandmother.

"What is taking so long?" Emily complains.

"She had to be airlifted here Emily," Richard says. "I believe that takes time."

Emily sighs doing her best to keep herself together. Richard looks over and takes her hand…what else can he do. Rory watches them from her own seat in this bright waiting room. Their relationship with their daughter wasn't always a particularly good one, but they love her, Rory knows that. She just hopes that her mother does too. She feels like she should be doing something, calling someone. She called her grandparents and her dad, who is on his way, but who else? She wonders if she should wake Sookie in the middle of the night. She decides to wait until she has more information to call anybody else.

Waiting is the hardest part. Not knowing what happened or what's going to happen. She wants to cry but can't bring herself do it. Not yet. This isn't like when Logan was hurt and they wouldn't tell her anything because she wasn't family. They just won't tell her anything.

"Rory!" As she hears her name she looks up to see her father running down the hallway. She stands up as he approaches. "What happened? Where is she?" he asks.

Rory turns away from him. She can't answer any of his questions and just that fact alone freaks her out. She hears her grandmother's voice.

"Christopher," she says. "We don't know anything yet."

He takes Rory's seat and puts his face in his hands. While they wait Rory paces making lists in her head of everyone she needs to call, she says each name over and over again in her mind and when she forgets one she starts over. It's pointless though. The only thing she can think about are those four words, "There's been an accident," She feels like it's been days but really only hours have passed, and finally someone comes out to talk to them.

A doctor in green scrubs approaches them slowly. "Gilmore?" he asks. Rory's heart drops into her stomach. She is trembling; she is so scared. For so long all she had was her mom. There was no chance she could survive without her. She takes a seat beside her father so that she can listen to what the man has to say. He sits in front of them and begins to talk. "Her left arm is broken in two places and she fractured a few of her ribs. She suffered from several cuts bruises and has contusions on most of her body. She has a concussion, which is a brain injury that has resulted in a loss of consciousness. She spent the last hour in surgery and has stabilized but she isn't out of the woods just yet. The next 24 hours are critical but we won't know much more about the extent of her head injury until she wakes up. The baby, however, is fine," he explains. Rory tries to pay attention but all she can think is that her mother is alive. She didn't leave her. For the first time since she got the call she starts to cry. Christopher does his best to console her but she can't stop.

"Can we see her?" Emily asks when the doctor finishes talking.

"Yes," he says. "Follow me." They stand up and follow the doctor behind the wooden doors into the Intensive Care Unit.

Lorelai lies in the bed. Her eyes are closed and she isn't moving. If she wasn't beaten up so badly she would only appear to be sleeping, Rory thinks. "How long until she wakes up?" she finds herself asking.

"I'm not sure," he answers honestly. "In cases like this, unconsciousness could range anywhere from a few hours to a few months."

"But she will wake up right?" Rory asks but before he can answer another question pops into her mind. "Wait did you say baby? What baby? My mother isn't pregnant."

The doctor walks over to the bed and picks up the chart. He shakes his head "She's between 16 and 20 weeks along," he says.

Rory thinks back five months. "That's Luke," she says aloud. "We have to call him," she says aggressively to her grandmother.

"Alright Rory, calm down."

"I can't calm down!" she yells. "God! What is wrong with her? She gets pregnant and doesn't tell anybody and then one day she just picks up and leaves without so much as a see you later. Did you know about this?" she asks her father in an accusatory tone.

"No," he says shaking his head.

"Did you?" she asks her grandparents.

"Rory calm down," Emily says soothingly.

"I don't want to calm down," she says breaking down again. "I want my Mom. That's it, can you make her wake up?" she asks turning to the doctor with tears streaming down her face.

"She'll wake up," he says.

"Are you sure?" she questions. "Is there any chance at all that she might just die right here?"

"There's always a chance but-" Rory cuts him off by storming out of the room.

"Christopher, go after her," Emily instructs. "Richard you stay here with Lorelai, while I go track down this man." She sighs heavily as she walks out of the room. Christopher runs after his daughter and Richard takes a seat in the corner.

* * *

Richard Gilmore is a man who has seen a lot of things in his life, but never, not once in her thirty-eight years, has he ever seen his daughter so broken or helpless. He sits in the hard wooden chair in the far corner of the room instead of the one close to her bed and watches the rise and fall of her chest. He tries to remember back to her childhood, some significant moment they'd shared as a father and daughter but he can't remember a single one.

* * *

Emily leaves the hallway and walks out of the hospital. The sun is up and shining. She pulls her cell phone out of her purse and searches her phonebook for a number she was given a long time ago in case of emergencies. She reasoned to herself that this was an emergency. She pressed the green button, which connected her to another line. It was ringing.

"Luke's," Luke answers. His place sounds busy and full of people but Rory asked her to call so she speaks.

"Hello, Luke, this is Emily Gilmore."

"Um, Emily?"

"Yes." She lets out a breath. "Listen I'll get right to the point. My daughter was in a serious accident last night," Emily says finding the strength to say the words. "She was thrown from her jeep."

"What?"

"She just got out of surgery," Emily continues.

"Is she okay? Is the baby okay?" Luke questions quickly. "Oh my god," he says finding it hard to breathe.

"The baby is fine," Emily says. "My daughter however… well she is still unconscious. Aparently the next 24 hours are critical, but she's alive."

"Which hospital?"

"She was airlifted to Hartford General."

"I'll be right there," he says hanging up the phone.

Emily tries not to be surprised that Lorelai didn't tell anyone but _that man_ that she was pregnant but it still hurts. She slowly makes her way back inside.

* * *

"Rory," Christopher calls behind his daughter. "Rory wait!" She keeps going, keeps running. "Rory," he calls again. "Gilmore Girls don't run!" He says trying to lighten the mood a little bit. She slows down her pace and within a few seconds comes to a complete stop.

"I hate her!" she screams in frustration. Christopher shakes his head. He knows she doesn't mean it.

"No you don't," he says.

"Yes I do!" she cries with the same intense loudness. "Why would she do this?"

"I don't think she did it on purpose Rory," he tries to reason.

"Why wouldn't she tell me?" Rory asks. "I would have told her!"

"I don't know," he answers honestly.

"Aren't you even a little bit mad?" she inquires. "I mean she was dating you, she should have a least called you, told you."

"Rory," he started, but was cut off.

"How can you not be angry?"

"She's fighting for her life, Ror," he reasons. "There is going to be plenty of time to be mad later, but right now she needs us to be strong for her."

Rory shrugs and Christopher pull his daughter into him. "I don't hate her," Rory mumbles into his shirt. "But I want to."

"I know honey." He strokes her hair and tries to be the comfort that her mother would be if she were there.

"Do you think she would have told us?" she asks pulling away. "You know, if this hadn't happened."

"I don't think she could have kept it a secret for much longer."

She nods and wipes her face as they head back inside together.

* * *

Luke rushes into the hospital, with a million thoughts running through his mind, the main stream being that last phone conversation. She told him she was pregnant and he'd said nothing. Not one word of comfort or support or even discouragement. He was shocked. She said it was his but they hadn't been together in months. He was trying to piece together the puzzle of what she'd said and what Emily said. He walks around the hospital aimlessly for a while searching for the intensive care unit but finally spots Rory standing in the hallway.

"Rory!" he calls. She looks up at him.

"Luke," she says. She wrapped her arms around him when he got within arms length.

"Is she in there?" Rory nods and goes back to leaning up against the wall. "Who's in there with her?"

"No one," Rory answers. "My dad had to go check on my sister or something and my grandparents went to get something to eat. I couldn't leave her alone but I can't look at her like that," Rory tells him. "She doesn't look like Mom." This time her voice comes out as a whisper.

"Why don't you go get something to eat Rory? I'll sit with her," Luke offers.

"Are you sure?" she asks knowing their past. It'll probably be just as hard if not harder for him to look at her, she thinks.

"Yes," he tells her simply.

"Okay, but I think I am just going to get coffee."

"Sounds good."

"Luke?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks for coming." He nods and she walks away.

He takes a deep breath and then opens the door. He knew she won't be sitting up watching T.V. but he doesn't expect her to look that bad. Rory is right, she is unrecognizable. He steps in and closes the door behind him quietly. She looks like she is sleeping and he doesn't want to wake her up. He nervously approaches her bedside, takes a seat in the chair beside it, and examines her a little more closely.

Her right arm, the one closet to him, is connected to the IV. It rests on her stomach. Purple, blue, and green marks dance up her arms and disappear into the sleeve of the hospital gown. Her left arm is casted up to the elbow. Her left cheekbone is dark purple and the right side of her face is cut up. He wonders if she'll ever look the same again. A nurse walks in ripping Luke's attention away from the woman he loves.

"Hello," she says with sympathetic cheer.

"Hey," he returns solemnly.

She walks over and checks Lorelai's IV bag and heart monitor. "Fetal heart rate is really good," she tells him. He smiles. "You should talk to her," the nurse suggests.

"Can she hear me?" he asks.

"She can, she can feel too, it's okay to hold her hand. It won't hurt her," the nurse promises as she leaves the room.

Luke looks up at Lorelai again and removes a stray hair from her face. "You're beautiful," he starts a little nervous. Truthfully he isn't a man of many words. "I'm so sorry," he mumbles meaningfully almost breaking down completely and grabs her hand. "I know you said this doesn't change anything but I love you, Lorelai, I love you and I don't want to live in a world where you don't exist." He pauses trying his hardest not to cry. With all of his strength he starts to beg. "Come back to me, Lorelai and I promise, I'll do whatever it takes…"His voice trails off as he realizes that his sleeping beauty is squeezing his hand back. He looks at their intertwined fingers and then up to her face. Her breathing is still shallow, her eyes are still closed and she is still not moving but she squeezed his hand. "Lorelai?" he says.

* * *

For a week Rory doesn't leave the hospital. She hardly even leaves the close vicinity of the hospital room. Christopher comes to visit for a little while everyday and calls for updates periodically. It also seems like Emily never leaves, especially after the first week when Rory is forced by her father and grandparents to go back to Yale, she takes her granddaughter's full time shift. Luke, like Christopher also stops by every day. He brings with him a cup of coffee, just in case she should happen to need it. Sookie comes by as much as she can with the Inn and her own family. There were also a few personal appearances from the other Stars Hollow town members.

After two weeks pass, Rory is in full time freak out mode. She calls in between every class and doesn't even move back into Logan's apartment. Between the hospital and school and the paper she doesn't have time for much anything else, especially her long distance boyfriend.

It is rare that everyone who'd gathered at the hospital on that first day is there at the exact same time, because they all had lives outside the hospital and had to take shifts visiting in balance with the rest of life. Richard was the only one from the group missing but that was only because he'd been called away on business. Emily, who is always around, sits in the chair next to her daughters bed watching, what she would call some ridiculous television program, when Rory comes in. She just finished her last class of the week and is ready spend the night with her still unconscious best friend. She walks in greets her grandmother and takes a seat beside the window sill pulling the book she brought out of her purse to read it. Chris and Luke arrive at the same time. Gigi was spending the night with his mother so Chris is in no hurry, and because it's a school night, April is in Woodbridge with her mother. Chris sits down beside Rory on the window and Luke takes the chair opposite Emily.

They make polite conversation but mostly stay quiet. They turn their attention to the made for television movie that Emily is barely watching. Trying to get over the unique awkwardness of the situation and keeping to themselves no one notices when pair of vibrant blue eyes flutter open.

Lorelai opens her eyes but she can't see. Everything around her is blurry. After maybe three seconds of being awake and unfamiliar pain takes over her. It's crippling and makes her feel like she will die if she moves or speaks. She blinks her eyes a couple times and tries to focus. She sees the figure of people around her and turns on the panic button. Her heart monitor begins to beep much faster than it was catching the attention of everyone in the room. She whimpers.

Lorelai would scream if she could but since she can't she stares back at the four faces staring in on her.

"Mom," Rory says. Lorelai shifts her eyes to her daughters face.

"I'll go get the doctor," Christopher says running out of the room. Lorelai stays still. When Christopher returns with the man in the white coat he pushes them all out and examines Lorelai.

Her shines a light in both of her eyes that makes her wince, "Welcome back," he says when he realizes that she is responsive. She continues to not say anything curious as to what is going on.

"Do you remember what happened?" he asks.

She shakes her head a little. "Ow," she cries hoarsely when she touches her.

"I'm sorry," he apologizes. "I'm going to ask you a few questions and then I'll let your family back for a few minutes. Okay?" She doesn't respond.

"First question: Can you tell me your name?" he asks while he checks her vital signs.

She thinks about it, "Lorelai," she says after a second. Her mouth is dry and hoarse so it doesn't come out above a whisper.

"Okay, and when is your birthday?" he continues.

She clears her throat so that she can speak better, "April 27th," she answers effortlessly.

"Who's the president?"

It takes her a second to come up with an answer "Um, Ronald Regan?" she says as if she's asking him.

He stops his examination, "Lorelai, what year is it?"

"It's…1984."

"And how old are you?"

"Fifteen," she tells him shyly.

He smiles tightly. "I'll be back in just a few minutes."

"Wait!" she exclaims with all the energy she can muster.

"Yes?" he asks turning around.

"Is my baby okay?" she inquires nervously.

He nods slowly and then answers, "Your baby is fine,"

She nods and then closes her eyes and sighs as she tries to remember what happened, to figure out who all those people were standing over her, and how she ended up here.

The doctor exits the room and goes over to where her family is waiting. "Well," Emily says quickly as she stands.

"She's awake, lucid, she can comprehend and evaluate, so I would say we can move her out of the ICU tomorrow," he tells them. Rory smiles. "However, she doesn't remember anything."

"Since the accident?" Rory asks for clarification.

"No, I mean she doesn't remember anything since 1984."

"1984?" Emily repeats.

Rory's smile fades. "She doesn't remember anything?"

"No, not at this point. I think she has what's call Amnesia syndrome but I will do a comprehensive evaluation to rule out other possible causes of memory loss, such as Alzheimer's disease, dementia, depression, or brain tumor."

"What?" Rory finds herself asking. "She was hit over the head, of course she has Amnesia."

"I will also need to do a neurological exam to check reflexes, sensory function, balance and other physiological aspects of the brain and nervous system and then run a few tests."

"Fine, do it, whatever. Just fix her," Rory yells standing up. The doctor nods. "Can I go see my mother now?" she asks harshly.

"Yes," he says. "But I don't think you should over whelm her. Maybe you should go one at a time. And maybe just you Emily," he tries. "You may be the only person she recognizes."

Emily nods as Rory huffs and crosses her arms and slumps back down. For the first time in weeks things are starting to look up but then something like this happens.

"It's okay kid," Christopher tells her but they are just words.

Rory doesn't say anything.


	3. Memories

**Hi. Um, I just wanted to thank everyone for all the reviews I've been getting. I am also glad you guys are intrigued as most of you put it. I'm trying to get these chapters out as regularly as possible but I do have a life (cough cough) and spring break has begun as of today so...that means the next chapter may or may not be out until next week. It all depends on what my vacation is like, just please dont lose patience with me. I have started chapter four so at least we are already somewhere. I hope you all have a wonderful vacation as well and please keep up the reviews. They keep me going. **

**-PMB**

Memories

The brain can't help but remember what it remembers and forget everything else. After the doctor leaves Lorelai tries to place her memories in some sort of chronological order. She asks herself what she remembers. She remembers waking up after an exciting night with Christopher. She remembers sneaking out of her window to go hang with him the night before. She remembers sneaking back in through the same window when the night had finally ended and she remembers crashing in her jeans and t-shirt. After she woke up she remembers going down stairs and having another silent breakfast with her parents. She remembers her mother telling her that they were going to have her fitted for her debutant gown for her coming out party. She remembers huffing and yelling that she didn't want a coming out party and losing the argument because Emily didn't care what she wanted. She remembers going to school and talking to her friends, she remembers being the only one to get an A on that history paper. She remembers throwing out her lunch and stealing coffee from the teacher's lounge in the middle of the day. She remembers taking her last midterm. After school she remembers walking home with Christopher laughing all the way about whatever. She remembers that no one was there when she came home from school. She remembers the drink Chris made her being rough. She vaguely remembers something about Paris and sleeping on a park bench. She remembers kissing him so hard that they could have been permanently fused together. She remembers how they hardly parted all the way up the stairs to her bedroom. They made it onto her balcony shedding clothes from the moment they entered her bedroom door, she remembers the chill of the winter air. She gasps as she remembers something else and then sighs because the breath she contracted hurts to let out. She knows that was months ago. She remembers watching the stick turn pink. She closes her eyes tightly as the memory resurfaces and then grazes her hand against her expanding tummy.

The doctor leads Emily back into Lorelai's room while the others waited outside the door. Just before the door closes behind them Lorelai locks eyes with a gruff diner owner in a backwards baseball cap and she smiles at him. She doesn't know why. It just sort of happens.

"Lorelai?" the doctor asks her. "How are you feeling?" Lorelai takes in the question. She wonders how he would be feeling if he woke up in a hospital bed in unspeakable pain surrounded by people he didn't know, but then she determines that it's probably not what he meant.

"Bloated," she answers honestly while tensing up. "and there is this pain that is continuous, everywhere, all over my body, all the time, and I was really hoping you could make that go away. You've heard of morphine haven't you doc?"

The doctor laughs. "We'll see what we can do? In the meantime, someone here would like to see you." Lorelai glances over to her mother. She gives her a once over and wonders if they told her mother that she's pregnant and concludes that they probably had but if they did then she would most likely be really mad about it. Lorelai notes that she doesn't look mad before she speaks.

"Hi Mom," she sighs with her muscles still clenched. "Are you mad?" she asks immediately.

"Why would I be mad?" Emily asks as she sits down next to her daughter.

"Because I…um." she breathes trying to think. "Am I grounded? Because I don't think that it's fair to ground me when I don't even remember doing whatever it is that I did to end up in here so then the whole reflection part of the punishment is gone and that defeats the purpose," Emily smiles with tears in her eyes as her daughter rambles. Lorelai takes another breath and then looks up at her mother.

"We'll see," Emily says. We'll see like as in maybe or maybe not, Lorelai thinks a little confused. This woman was her mother, the same one she'd had her entire life yet…there was something different about her, something different besides the fact that she looked like she gained 20 years over night. She decides not to push it.

"You look different," Lorelai notes.

"Do I?"

"Yes." A pregnant pause lingers, "…Mom?"

"Yes?"

"What happened?" she asks innocently knowing that she is missing a large piece of the puzzle.

"You don't worry about that. You just get some rest."

"Who were those people?" Lorelai continues to push.

"Lorelai," Emily says in a sharp manner which closely resembles stop talking. Lorelai huffs and then cries out because she forced her lungs too hard. She keeps forgetting not to do that. "Relax," Emily demands a little harshly. Lorelai wonders how she is supposed to relax with her head pounding, and the pain surging, all while growing a human being. She closes her eyes anyway and tries to go back to sleep.

Emily exits the room. "Well?" Rory asks in an annoyed tone after Emily closes the door.

"She's fifteen," Emily answers.

"Wonderful," Rory says letting her arms fall down beside her. "Can I go in now?"

"She doesn't know who you are?" Emily says.

"But I am her daughter," Rory defends, "She has to know who I am,"

"You aren't born yet," The older woman argues.

"Oh really because I am pretty sure that I am," Her granddaughter counters.

"You don't have to take that tone," Emily says quickly. "Tomorrow,"

"What?" Rory asks.

"Tomorrow, after she sees all the doctors and the psychologist, then you can see her."

"Erg," Rory groans. "I hate this,"

"I know, but you should just go home, get a good night's sleep and come back tomorrow," Emily says trying at compassion.

"Whatever," Rory retorts. "My stuff is still in there,"

"I'll get it," Emily offers as doctor approaches with a chart in his hand.

"We can give her Roxanol for the pain." He says. "Its morphine. Now while there is no evidence so far that a pregnant woman's short-term use of MS Contin can harm her unborn baby, we don't usually administer it because of the effect it could have but because Lorelai is in so much pain the benefit to her outweighs the possible risk to the child." He explains to them.

"Your mother asked for pain medication," Emily tells Rory.

"She doesn't know that she is pregnant," Rory states. "She wouldn't take it if she knew, you have to tell her."

"Why me?"

"Because I don't exist remember." She replies sharply.

"She knows that she is pregnant," the doctor chimes in.

"What?"

"The first thing she asked me was if her baby was okay,"

"Oh my god," Rory groans realizing that her mother thinks she is pregnant in a different decade. "She thinks she is pregnant with me,"

Emily sighs.

"Rory I need you to sign off on this. You are 21 and your mother isn't married so that gives you power of attorney." The doctor explains handing over the forms.

Emily gasps in shock, "But she is just a child, and Lorelai is my daughter," she protests.

The doctor nods, "But Rory isn't a child, she's grown up and Lorelai's next of kin, I need her to sign off on it or I can't give her mother anything,"

Rory looks down at the documents in her hand. "Do you think it'll hurt the baby?" she asks.

"In my medical opinion after everything, the accident, the surgery…no I think the baby will be fine,"

"And it'll make Mom feel better, right?"

"Yes," he answers simply.

Rory sighs, "Okay," she takes the pen from the top of the clip board and presses it to the paper before stopping.

"What is it?" Emily asks noticing her granddaughters sudden pause.

"Luke should have a say in this, don't you think?" she starts, "I mean after all, it is kind of his baby,"

Emily huffs and storms off to the waiting room to find the father of her unborn grandchild. He is sitting in the waiting room on one side of the room and she spot Christopher sitting on the other.

"Luke!" she calls out before waving him over. He stands up and put the magazine he pretending to read down in the chair next to him and jumps up. Emily doesn't speak. She hardly even looks at him. He follows behind her at a close pace until they both find themselves in Rory's presence.

"Is she okay?" he asks.

"Yeah Luke, she's okay," Rory answers while her grandmother rolls her eyes. "It's just she's in a lot of pain and the doctors said they can give her something and they don't think it will hurt the baby but it's your baby so I thought I'd run it by you before I sign anything."

"You want my opinion?" he asks a little confused.

"Well yeah I mean…" Rory takes a deep breath wondering what the hell he means. If they were still together this would be his job anyway. Rory thinks about the events that the last few have caused. "…erg!" she stresses getting frustrated. "This shouldn't be happening. I shouldn't have to make these decisions." She rants. "God, she should be your wife anyway, If you would have just married her like you were supposed to none of this would have ever happened."

Emily and Luke stare at Rory wide eyed as she pouts. "Rory…I"

"Yes or no, Luke?" she asks again.

"Yeah sure, go ahead." He tells her, thinking that he only wants Lorelai to be happy. It's all he ever really wanted. "Yes," he repeats, a little more firmly.

"Fine," Rory huffs, still a little worked up. She signs her name on the line at the bottom of the page and stalks off to find the doctor.

* * *

"I'm going to go," Rory says to her grandmother, Christopher, and Luke, a little later after she's calmed down. She doesn't want to admit to them how hurt she is mainly because she doesn't want to seem like a baby. Like the doctor said she really isn't a child anymore. She wasn't really upset with Luke earlier either she just couldn't make sense of her jumbled emotions.

She knows that her mother didn't block out her entire existence on purpose. It however, still hurts to think about it. Rory turns back to her grandmother, "She's asleep right?"

Emily nods. "Yes."

"I'll be right back," she says as she slowly approaches the think wooden door. She turns the medal handle and pushes it open. Emily was right; Lorelai is again out like a light. Rory takes a slow step inside not wanting to wake her. She just wants to say goodnight. It doesn't feel right to just go home and leave her mother in this cold, clean, hospital but she convinces herself that she needs sleep and she'll be no use to anyone if she stays this crabby. Rory pulls the covers up over Lorelai and then leans over and kisses her forehead. "Goodnight Mommy," she whispers.

* * *

Luke sits in the waiting room with Christopher. They have spent more time together in the last few weeks then either of them would personally care to but neither of them could leave. This is the first time they sat alone. Rory had just left and Emily was planning on staying in the room with Lorelai. Luke clears his throat intending to speak.

"I…um…I'm sorry about….you know," Luke starts.

"Sucker punching me first thing in the morning," Christopher retorts way to quickly, "Yeah I know exactly what you mean."

"I was…really…mad…and I don't know…all of a sudden I standing outside you apartment and you were…right there…and I needed and outlet. It shouldn't have…I shouldn't have done that…I'm sorry." Luke repeats.

Chris shrugs. "Forget about it,"

That was the only conversation the two of them shared and surprisingly it was enough.

* * *

The following day comes and brings with it an enormous headache for Lorelai and visits from several prestigious doctors that her mother took it upon herself to hire. She sits through all the tests her doctor gives her and then she is forced to talk to three different psychologists that all conclude the same thing, she has amnesia. Explaining this to Lorelai is going to be a hell of a task, Emily thinks to herself as she finishes her conversation with the last doctor.

Rory comes back to the hospital around lunch time. She thinks that because she went home and gave herself a chance to sleep in and did a little studying now is the perfect time to go check and see if her mother has gained her memory back yet. It is a long shot but Rory fancies herself pretty optimistic. She presses the number 3 on the elevator and heads upstairs. As she steps out she turns her head toward the waiting room and sees Luke, asleep. Poor guy, she thinks as she walks past him wondering if her dad went home. She doesn't see Christopher or her grandmother, or anyone else recognizable besides Luke who is asleep. She decides that she isn't going to be the one to interrupt his moments rest. She smiles thinking to herself that there is no one to stop her from seeing her mother. She approaches Lorelai's room and feels the apprehensive about going in. Reluctantly she sucks in a deep breath and enters.

Lorelai is eating pudding. Chocolate pudding which Rory knows she loves. She wonders who she conned into giving her the sugary treat and closes the door behind her. Lorelai's eyes shoot up at the stranger who isn't really a stranger at all and gets a little annoyed.

"I'm sorry," Rory says after she sees the look in her mother's eyes. "I should have knocked."

Lorelai shrugs and sets her pudding cup on the table. "You hear to ask me about my childhood?" she asks.

"What?"

"Or my relationships, or my school, or my baby?" Lorelai continues.

"I don't know-"Rory starts but is cut off.

"What kind of doctor are you?"

"I'm not-"

Lorelai sighs, "Are you here with more meds? Because if you are you just might be my favorite kind of doctor." Lorelai smiles which causes Rory to smile because she missed it so much.

"I'm not a doctor," Rory says quickly before Lorelai can cut her off with anymore questions.

"hmm," Lorelai hums as she picks her pudding cup back up and sticks another spoonful in her mouth. "Are you a lawyer? You look like a lawyer."

"No, I'm not a lawyer. I'm a student."

Lorelai raises an eyebrow, "A law student?"

"No," Rory laughs. She doesn't realize how nervous she really is until she looks down at her trembling hand.

"Where do you go to school?" Lorelai asks.

"Yale," Rory blurts immediately.

Lorelai rolls her eyes. "Not this again?"

"What?"

"Did my parents put you up to this? Is that why you're here? I must say they have impeccable timing, getcha while you're strapped to a hospital bed relying on nurses to point where you can't even go to the bathroom by yourself."

"No, no, you've got it all wrong. I'm not here to talk you into going to Yale."

Lorelai sets the empty cup down and lays back on her pillow. "You aren't?"

"Not at all," Rory laughs.

"Then why are you here? Did you get lost at the vending machines or something?"

"Not quite," Rory answers timidly as she sits beside Lorelai's bed.

Lorelai looks at her, and then turns her head to the side, "I know you!" she exclaims with very little energy. Rory smiles thinking this might just be some sort of break through. "You were here when I woke up, yesterday? I think you called me Mom."

"I…"

"No, I am actually pretty positive about it." Lorelai reiterates. Rory doesn't speak, if she did, what could she say? Deny it? Lorelai continues to stare at her, "You know…you're really pretty."

"Thank...you" Rory manages.

"Welcome, but you still haven't told me why you're here." Lorelai grins because she thinks she is finally going to start getting some answers but their mini moment is interrupted by Emily walking through the door.

"Rory," she gasps, not expecting to see her granddaughter there.

"Um, hi," Rory replies. Emily approaches her daughter and granddaughter.

"Uh oh," Lorelai whispers to her daughter. "She has that look on her face. Which one of us is in trouble?"

"What's going on in here?" Emily asks.

"I was just talking to your friend here, Mom." Lorelai answers.

Emily huffs. "I think it's time we stopped playing charades, Lorelai."

"I didn't realize we were, Mother."

"We need to talk." Emily says as she pulls the other chair up beside Rory's.

"I agree," Lorelai states. "Are you ready to tell me what happened?"

"Yes," Emily says shortly. "Are you ready to listen?"

"I am all ears,"

Rory notices that the way they talk to each other is almost like a challenge.

"You were in an accident," Emily begins to explain.

"So I've gathered." Lorelai replies.

"Lorelai!"

"Sorry, I'll be quiet,"

Emily sighs wondering what the best way to break news like this to someone is. "Lorelai, you were in a car accident and you lost your memory." She says just spitting it out.

"I lost my memory," Lorelai repeats.

"Yes,"

"I lost my memory?" she says again with a little more force behind her voice. It isn't that she doesn't believe what her mother just told her. It would actually explain a lot, except for the fact that she remembers stuff.

"Yes Lorelai, you were thrown from your car because you weren't wearing a seatbelt and ended up with a serious concussion that gave you amnesia."

Lorelai laughs but then stops because it hurts. "I don't have a car, Mom." Lorelai declares. "I don't have a driver's license. Hell, I'm not even sixteen."

"You're thirty-eight." Emily retaliates. Lorelai has to hold her breath to keep from laughing again.

"Thirty-eight, Mom, really?" she says when she regains her composure. "You couldn't come up with anything more ridiculous."

"Lorelai, I am not making this up," Emily tries.

"She really isn't," Rory says speaking for the first time.

Lorelai rolls her eyes. "I don't even know you," she says harshly to Rory.

"Exactly," Rory rises.

Lorelai looks at her confused. "Should I know you?" Lorelai says softening her voice.

"I should say so," Rory says looking down at the floor. They all sit quietly for a minute.

"Thirty-eight, huh?" Lorelai asks trying to freak herself out.

"Yes," Emily says and Rory nods.

"So it's not 1984,"

"No," Emily says quietly.

"What year is it?" Lorelai asks not wanting to do the math herself.

"2006," Rory answers.

Lorelai sucks in a large breath but is very careful about releasing it. "You swear?"

"Cross my heart and kiss my elbow," Rory says quickly.

Lorelai smiles at the Holly Golightly reference and then lets it fade as a whole new series of questions pop into her head. She doesn't know where to start. She turns her head and looks carefully at the young brunette sitting beside her. She makes her think of Christopher. "Where's Chris?" Lorelai asks.

"He'll be back soon," Emily sighs softly.

"You look like him," Lorelai says to Rory putting the missing puzzle pieces back together in her mind. Emily and Rory are quiet giving Lorelai a moment to process the information she was just given.

"Thirty-eight?" she says again. She says it out loud to try and make her words connect to her brain but there is nothing, it doesn't compute, she can't comprehend. She thinks about how much time has passed. "Twenty-two years." She says and then dwells on that for a few minutes. So much can happen in twenty two years. Most thirty eight year olds aren't still in high school. Did I go to college? Did I get married? Did I marry Christopher? Do I live as far away from my parents as I always dreamed? And what about….She cuts off her thoughts and raises her hand to her stomach and then turns to her head to the right. Rory has tears pooling and Lorelai thinks she knows why. "How old are you?" Lorelai asks as soon as the thought dawns. It makes so much sense. Why she called her Mom when she first woke up, why she looks so much like Christopher, Why she's even here in the first place. Lorelai can't believe it took her this long to put it together.

"Twenty—one," Rory answers slowly.

"Lorelai—" Emily tries.

Lorelai stare off blankly offering her mother no response. "….Lorelai….."


	4. Pictures

**A/N- Alright boys and girls here is your chapter four. Okay so decision time. Luke and Lorelai's baby: boy or girl? See I already know which way I am leaning but I want your opinion too because you guys are my readers and if you are leaning the other way then I'll have some serious things to consider. So yeah just let me know in the review that I just know you're going to leave me. **

Pictures

He sits in a hard chair in the cold waiting room picturing her bruised and battered face while running her daughter's words through his mind over again. He pulls out his wallet and opens it. The first thing he sees is her picture. Her bright smile committed to film just for him. Behind it is a picture of Rory, and another of April, and on the inside is the horoscope that he just can't bring himself to get rid of. He hears Rory's voice.

"_God, she should be your wife anyway, if you would have just married her like you were supposed to none of this would have ever happened."_

And she is right.

_Let's elope._

He feels completely responsible for everything that Lorelai is going through right now.

_Come on, Luke. Grab your keys. Let's go._

After all, he pined for her for years, and then when he finally got up the nerve to tell her how he felt he yelled at her for not seeing his side of things.

_You said that would be fine at Martha's Vineyard. Didn't you say that would be fine at Martha's Vineyard?_

He told her that he was in. Not just in, he said 'all in' and she believed him.

_Come on, then! Let's go! We can drive to Maryland. What the hell, right? I mean, you have to see Maryland eventually. We can drive there, get married, and then come back here. And you'll get your stuff, and you'll move in._

He made her believe him.

_I mean we have the plan already, right? We just have to put the plan in motion._

Then there was Christopher at her parent's vowel renewal drunk and spouting off at the mouth, and even though he knew nothing had happened between them he left her there. She told him she was all in, but he took himself out all the same.

_Yes, we do, because we've been waiting and putting it off, and I don't want to put it off anymore._

He broke her heart once and hearing her shaky voice on the answering machine…that just about killed him.

_Yes, now is the right time. It's the best time because it's now!_

When they worked through it he told himself he would never let anything like that happen again but he did.

_Your car or mine?_

He didn't tell her about April.

_No I don't wanna talk, all we've done for months is talk. I want to do. I want to go._

The look on her face when he emerged from the kitchen and saw her talking to his daughter is forever embedded in his mind.

_Why not, Luke? Don't you love me?_

He never wanted to cause her that kind of pain.

_But I love you, Luke. I love you. But I have waited, and I have stayed away, and I have let you run this thing, and no more. I asked you to marry me, and you said yes._

He never wanted her to question his love for her but she had.

_We fixed up the house, right? We have a bigger closet, and I didn't get the purple wallpaper because you didn't want the purple wallpaper. And if it's between you and the purple wallpaper, I pick you!_

And in the end he let her walk away.

_Do you care about me?_

He wanted to be the one to protect her but in the end he became the very thing he hated most.

_Because I'm going crazy here. I made a commitment to you, and I need to make it happen._

Just like all the others had.

_But once we're married, everything with April will be fine. Anna said so._

In a way he was worse than all the others because in the end he knew what he was doing.

_When I talked to Anna…_

Because he was the one to pick up the pieces of her broken heart every time something went wrong, every time Christopher left her again.

_I know. I'm sor… God, no! I'm not gonna defend myself! For months now, I've been skulking around not saying anything, not having an opinion, like I'm Clarence Thomas or something, and I… I'm done with that. I-I've been waiting for a long time, and I don't want to wait anymore._

He remembers being the only one she'd ever shown herself too.

_You're gonna have to figure out how April fits into our lives, not the other way around._

He was the only one she really opened herself up for.

_Well, try married!_

He saw the scared senseless sixteen-year-old girl that she kept buried underneath brilliant blue eyes and a dazzling smile.

_I don't like Mondays, but unfortunately they come around eventually._

"_None of this would have ever happened." _He hears Rory say again.

_Well, I'm sorry to hear that._

He hurt her. He hurt her and he hurt their baby.

_And I have to go._

Just as Luke wonders if he will ever be able to earn her back his cell phone rings, with a vibra-melody combo that Lorelai applied to it when he first got it. He flips it open and presses the cool medal to his ear without first looking at the caller ID.

"Hello?" he answers in a tired voice.

"Luke, It's Anna," he hears.

"Oh, hey, Anna," he breathes, "What's going on?"

"I hate to do this but I was wondering if we could meet up," she says and he can hear the hopefulness in her voice.

"Um," He glance around the waiting room and then lets out a weary sigh. "Sure."

* * *

"…Lorelai…" Emily repeats for the third time.

At the sound of her name, Lorelai glances up at her mother briefly before turning away again. Nothing in her head makes sense. Her brain is like an interstate highway in the mist of afternoon traffic. Jam packed. There is just so much information to process, so many questions to ask. Where to begin? Lorelai lies back on her pillow picking her first question. It isn't an easy process either. She hears her name a fourth time and determines that she isn't going to be able to come up with anything if Emily keeps calling her name like that. She turns her head to look at her mother but catches Rory's eyes first and keeps her focus.

"So you're…" she trails off, not realizing that she is speaking out loud. "You're my…"

Rory nods. Lorelai exhales. "Wow," she breathes out. It really is amazing. "You're….tall," she compliments trying to find something to say.

"Um…thank you," Rory returns.

Another moment of awkward silence passes between them. "I'm sorry," Lorelai says plainly. "This is weird."

"Kinda," Rory agrees.

"Lorelai, don't slouch over like that," Emily scolds, watching Lorelai's posture change.

"I'm not comfortable, Mother," Lorelai returns with a grumble.

Emily rolls her eyes, "How do you feel about all this?" she asks.

"How do I feel about what?" Lorelai retorts. "Losing twenty-two years of my life? Finding out I have a grown daughter? Being confined to this bed? Mother, how exactly am I supposed to feel about it?"

Emily doesn't know how to respond to her daughter's sudden outburst. "Don't take that tone with me, Lorelai Gilmore," is all she can come up with in response.

"Whatever." Lorelai rolls her eyes wishing that there were someone there who understood her. "I want to see Chris," she proclaims.

Rory watches the both of them go back and forth feeling severely out of place. She zones out wondering if anything will ever be the same again until she realizes that Emily is standing and talking to her.

"Rory!" her grandmother calls again.

"What?" she asks coming to.

"Call your father," she repeats. "I'll be waiting outside," she continues in a huff.

"Oh, okay, Grandma." She pulls out her Sidekick and flips it open to dial the number, all the while not noticing her mother staring at the device with blatant curiosity.

"Hello?" Christopher answers from his car.

"Dad," Rory states looking up to her mother.

"Rory? What's going on? Is everything okay?" he asks genuinely concerned.

"Um, everything is fine, the same actually, it's just… Mom is asking for you," Rory tells him. She also notes the change in her mother's face when she says the word 'mom'.

"Okay honey, I was on my way back anyway," he says.

"Okay good, um, I guess we'll see you soon then." She smiles. "Bye."

"Bye," he replies and Rory hangs up the phone.

"Rory," Lorelai tries, speaking the name for what seems like the first time. She notes how weird it sounds coming out of her mouth and narrows her eyes. "That's your name, right?"

Her daughter nods. "That is correct." Rory smiles before shaking her head. "Actually it's Lorelai," she remembers.

"Lorelai?" Lorelai repeats questioningly.

"Yeah," Rory confirms with a smile, thinking of every birthday, when her mother would crawl into bed with her at 4:03 in the morning and tell her the story of the night she was born.

"You, um…" Rory blushes, suddenly feeling weird about explaining the situation. "You, were laying in the hospital bed thinking about how men name babies after themselves all the time so why couldn't you, and thus…" Rory concludes motioning toward herself.

"Lorelai," her mother finishes for her.

"Exactly, although I think a large amount of Demerol actually went into that decision."

Lorelai laughs softly. "That's actually really smart," she starts. "I was thinking about it and I couldn't come up with anything good enough."

"You've thought about it?" Rory asks.

"All the time," Lorelai answers. "Not just a name, but…everything,"

"What do you mean?" Rory urges genuinely curious.

Lorelai shrugs, "Lots of things, I wondered if you would be a boy or a girl, what you would look like…things like that," she explains shyly. "I guess I know now," she laughs, "I never pictured you, you know, so…grown but I guess I always knew you'd be a girl."

"You did?"

"Yeah, I mean I wondered what it would be like if I was wrong but I dreamed of baby girls and that had to mean something right?"

"I guess."

"After I finished freaking out about it I got really excited, I wasn't really that far along I mean I hadn't even told Emily and Richard yet." She sighs, "I just wanted to see you, hold you, I guess I'll never get my chance now," she finishes sadly. "I feel like I've missed so much."

"Mom," Rory sighs shaking her head before she is cut off.

"Could you not…" Lorelai starts trying to find a way to not sound harsh, "I mean could you just…um…call me Lore, for now?" she tries gently.

"Oh…uh…sure," Rory says nodding her head. "Lore," she says trying it out. "Seems disrespectful."

Lorelai laughs, "I don't feel disrespected."

"Good,"

The room goes quiet again. "I brought you some stuff from home," Rory says breaking the silence. "Nothing big, some photo albums, my baby book, I just thought it might help you remember."

Lorelai shrugs a little, "I'll look at them, but I can't make any promises," she says. Rory wonders if the tone she hears in her mother's voice is defiance but shakes her head and lifts her bag from the floor to hand the items over.

* * *

Christopher walks into the hospital again wondering what to expect when he enters that hospital room. He pictures Lorelai at fifteen. The violent storm that was looking into her blue eyes. He could think of that Lorelai all day but a face first collision with another person about the same size as himself breaks him from his reflection. He catches himself before losing his balance completely and looks up.

"Oh, sorry, I didn't see you," Luke says.

"No, my fault, I wasn't paying attention," he mumbles in response. "You leaving?"

"Just for a bit, I'll be back later," Luke tells him in way that tells the other man he is marking his territory.

"Drive safe," Chris mutters halfheartedly before walking toward the ICU leaving Luke to his business.

He approaches the room and takes a deep breath before knocking on the door. A nervous few seconds pass before Rory opens it. "Hey kid," he says softly with a smile. He walks into the room and hugs her as the door closes behind him.

"Dad," Rory sighs into his embrace.

Chris gives her a small laugh as she hugs him tighter. "Hey kid," he repeats. "How's it going?"

Christopher glances up at the bed and can't help but smile. "Lore."

Rory lets go and Chris smiles down at her before walking over to Lorelai's bedside.

Rory, sensing their need to be alone politely excuses herself. They watch her leave and then Chris returns his focus to those bright blue eyes. "Hi," she says shyly.

"Hey," he reciprocates.

She smiles at him as she reaches out and touches the side of his face. "Christopher?" she whispers. His eyes fill up with tears as he thinks about just how close he came to losing his best friend. She grimaces at his display of emotion and pulls away but he grabs her hand before she move away completely. "I thought I was going to lose you," he admits.

Lorelai shakes her head, "You of all people should know better," she giggles. "I'm invincible, remember?"

Chris chuckles and wipes his face. "You look so different," she mutters. "I feel like I'm dreaming,"

"Want me to pinch you?" Chris smirks and she grants him a wide smile in return.

"No… I want you to tell me everything," she requests.

"Everything?"

"Yeah, I've been waiting for you."

"What do you mean…everything?"

"I mean how we ended up here?" she implores. "What happened after…well let's just start from after I told you I was pregnant. That seems to be the last thing I remember." Chris sighs and looks down. "What?" she says questioning his change in his form.

Lorelai senses his sudden discomfort. "It's okay," she tells him, "whatever it is, I just really need to know."

He looks up at her and nods. "We…uh…we told our parents," he starts. "and they…just…freaked out." She nods signaling for him to continue. "They sat down and discussed it and decided that we were going to get married and move in with your parents and raise Rory together." Lorelai scoffs knowing that, that was something she would never go along with.

"But…" she coaxes.

"But…you didn't want to get married."

"Sixteen is too young, we wouldn't make it."

"I know that," he says.

"Sorry, continue."

"Okay, so Rory was born and we decided not to get married and you dropped out of school to raise our daughter and I didn't do anything-"

"What do you mean?" she asks cutting him off.

"I mean I wasn't there to help you Lore," he explains, regret clear in his voice. "With any of it."

"Oh."

"I turned 18 and moved to California."

"And I… stayed in Hartford?" she questions.

"No…you left before I did. You said you didn't want Rory raised the way we were so you packed up your stuff and left."

"Where?"

"Stars Hollow."

Lorelai nods although she still had no idea where that is. "Okay," she says deciding not to dwell on the details. "So then what happened?"

"Then you got a job and brought up Rory."

"Why'd you go?"

Chris shrugs, "I was just…really stupid. I thought that your turning down my proposal gave me an out as a father and that just wasn't right."

Lorelai nods and watches Chris hang his head. "I'm not angry with you Christopher," she tells him softly as she runs her fingers through his hair. "She seems…well adjusted."

"It's all you."

"What?"

"Everything that she is….you did," he sighs. "I wish I could take more responsibility for the woman that she is but I can't."

"And now?" she asks suddenly.

"What?"

"What about now? You and me, where do we stand?"

Chris lets out a weary breath. "I don't know."

"Why not?"

"Because some things have happened recently that changed everything."

"From…" she asks getting frustrated with his vagueness.

"We got back together a couple of months ago…" he tries.

"Okay…so what's the problem?"

"You got pregnant."

Lorelai looks down at her swollen stomach and runs her hands over it. "I kinda figured."

"It's not mine," he continues reluctantly. "You were already pregnant before we got together."

"Oh," she says sounding surprised. "Who then?"

"He _was_ you fiancé," Chris supplies

"My fiancé?"

"Ex fiancé…Luke," he tells her.

"His name is Luke?" she asks trying to keep up.

"Yeah," he says with a shaky smile. "His name is Luke."

* * *

"Luke!" Anna calls when she sees him walk into the coffee shop.

"Anna, hey," he returns walking toward her. She hugs him when he enters her arms length and then motions for him to sit down. Anna takes note of the bags under his eyes and his uncut exterior.

"How is she?" she asks referring to Lorelai.

He smiles thinking of her and replies, "She woke up yesterday," he says.

"That's great Luke," Anna tells him sincerely.

"Yeah, I think she's going to be okay…I mean she has this with her memory and I haven't actually seen her yet but I just have a feeling, you know."

Anna smiles. "Yeah, absolutely."

"So you uh…wanted to meet?" he asks suddenly remembering their surroundings. "Is it April? Is she okay?"

"Yes Luke," Anna chuckles a little. "April is fine. Calm down," she assures him. "It's just I have a problem,"

"Anything I can help with?" Luke offers.

"Actually yes."

"What is it?"

"Well…my mom is having back surgery next week," she begins to explain.

"Oh."

"Yes and being the only child I am the only one who can go down there to New Mexico and take care of her but I just don't want to pull April out of school like that."

"I understand," he nods.

"So I was sort of wondering if she could stay with you."

"With me?" he questions.

"Yes Luke, I mean if it's a problem—"

Luke cuts her off. "No! It's no problem."

Anna smiles, "Good, I am so happy to hear you say that."

"It's my pleasure," Luke tells her, happy that he is finally getting more parental responsibility.

"So I'll call you and we can work out the details," she says standing up.

"Yeah….uh…that sounds good."

* * *

After spending the last hour telling her all about his life with his four-year-old daughter and revealing to her his decision to move to another continent he watches her face widen in shock.

"Paris," Lorelai repeats.

"Yes Paris," he says again.

"But Paris." She groans. "Why Paris?"

"That's where her mother lives," he tries to explain.

She nods. "When do you leave?"

"Soon," he replies.

"And you're just going to live there?"

"It seems important."

Lorelai sighs and tries to process how she is going to get through this. A moment later Chris speaks up. "I have to get home to Gigi," he says.

Christopher leans over and kisses Lorelai's cheek before he stands up. "Bye Lore," he says.

"Bye Chris," she returns as he walks out the door.

Truthfully she is exhausted from the eventfulness of her day. Glad that it's finally winding down Lorelai closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. She has a lot to think about. So much information being suddenly sprung on her is making her head spin. She puts her hands on her stomach and wonders about the baby inside her, pushing all other thoughts away. Opening her eyes again she notices the stack of books that Rory left behind. With a tired sigh she sits up and reaches over for one and brings it to her lap. She runs her fingers over the words LORELAI and RORY slowly taking in the detail to each letter. The cover flips back and the first page reveals a photo. A single picture of a little baby. Lorelai touches the glossy Polaroid and traces the features of the child. Her child. The one she never got to know. Underneath the caption is a short description written in her own bad handwriting.

_Lorelai Leigh Gilmore_

_October 8th 1984 at 4:03 am_

_6lbs 11oz_

She smiles thinking that in her wildest imagination she couldn't have picture a more beautiful baby.


	5. Nerves

**A/N: Good Morning, so I had a lot of things I wanted to include in this chapter but it ran kinda long and my beta assured me that it's fine at the length it is, so the next chapter will have lots of good stuff in it. I'm still debating the whole boy/girl baby thing. I got a few responses but they were very mixed so if you didn't cast your vote before then please, do it now. I'm thinking the big reveal will be in the next chapter. I hope you guys enjoy. **

Nerves

Rory wanders through the hospital hallways clutching a cup of really bad, watered down, coffee in her hand. She thinks about how long she can stay before she absolutely has to go back to school, and the answer is: not long. She has a paper to write and two classes tomorrow afternoon. Not to mention her responsibilities as the editor-in-chief of the Yale Daily News, which she has been sorely neglecting. She decides that since her laptop is in the car she can stay the night and type her paper from the hospital, email it to her professor, and go home in the morning for a catnap before her first class. Considering this to be a good plan she takes another sip and swallows quickly before she has the chance to gag and turns to step on to the elevator.

She presses the big number three that will lead her back to her mother's hospital room and thinks about her parents. The way her father smiled at her mother when he entered the room was unnerving. She frowns at the thought of them together because as much as she tried to reassure her mom that she was okay with them being together, she really wasn't. Not because she doesn't love her dad or she thinks badly of him, but because she knows him and more importantly than that she knows her mom. They just weren't meant to be. Lorelai was meant to be with- _Ding!_ Snapping away from her thoughts she is alerted that it's time for her to step out of the little box and on to the floor. She complies and offers a smile to the nurse stationed at the desk as she walks by.

Rory sighs and takes one last sip of the bad coffee. She swallows, shakes her head, and throws it out in the waiting room garbage can. She shutters wondering what in the world possessed her to buy it as she approaches the thick wooden door. Lifting her hand she rasps on it lightly.

"Come in," she hears.

Rory pushes the door open and lets herself inside. "Hey," she smiles at Lorelai. She notices the photo album in her mother's lap and smiles wider. "Whatcha doing?"

Lorelai looks up and smiles back. "Nothing much, looking at these pictures," she says. "Waiting…"

"What are you waiting for?"

"The doctor said they were going to move me into a room upstairs," Lorelai responds. "Then Emily went to go make sure they kicked out a nice elderly woman on life support so that I can have a room with a view and now I'm waiting," she sighs.

"Oh." Rory moves out of the doorway and closer to the bed. "May I sit?" she asks.

"Please."

Rory nods and takes off her coat. She puts it on the back of the chair and sits down. "So did you have a nice talk with Dad?" she starts.

Lorelai nods, "I did," she tells her. A second passes before Lorelai closes the book and looks down at her daughter. "I think we broke up."

"What?"

"I mean I'm not sure—I could be wrong," she expands.

"What exactly did he say?"

"Everything?"

Rory shrugs so Lorelai persists. "Well we mostly talked about you," she admits.

"Me?" Rory questions.

"Well yeah, I mean, I asked him to tell me everything, and he was really honest. He said that we decided not to get married and I dropped out of school to take care of you and he just kinda went off and did his own thing and we lived somewhere called Stars Hollow."

"Then what?"

"Then we started talking about us and – wait," she stops.

Rory furrows her brows in confusion, "What?"

"Is this appropriate? Us talking like this?" she asks reluctantly.

Rory smiles having not previously realized that they had fallen back into their normal rhythm and shrugs, "It's just the way we've always been. We tell each other everything," she confirms. "I mean you're my best friend."

Lorelai doesn't know what to say so she opts for nothing. She thinks about her relationship with her own mother and can't help but smile that she was able to do it differently.

"Friends first; mother and daughter second," Rory offers.

Lorelai nods. "Okay, so anyway, um…." She starts trying to remember where she left off. "Oh yeah I asked him about us and he went on and on about how we _were_ together but things changed and how this baby isn't his but my ex fiancé's."

"Luke," Rory adds.

"Yeah, Luke. So I told him not to worry about it and then he talked about Gigi, that's her name right?"

Rory nods.

"Yeah so he tells me that his ex-wife sent him a letter and she wants to see the kid, but we never really got into why she doesn't see the kid now, anyway so he tells me that he is moving to France."

"What!" Rory exclaims.

"That's what I said."

"So he's just leaving?"

Lorelai shrugs, "I guess," she says looking down.

"Wow," Rory says shaking her head. She almost can't believe it but at the same time she is hardly surprised. "That it?"

"Yeah then he said he had to go get his daughter and he left."

"Oh," Rory sighs.

Lorelai watches her daughters face fall and instantly feels bad. "I'm sorry," she extends. Rory looks up and sees the regret in her mother's face. She shares with her a small smile to let her know that she's alright.

"You shouldn't be sorry," Rory tells her. "You haven't done anything to be sorry for."

"It's just, this whole situation must really suck for you," Lorelai observes.

"What do you mean?"

"You make it sound like you and I have this great relationship but because of the accident I don't remember anything about it and then your father decides that now's the perfect opportunity to leave the country. It just really sucks. I wish this wasn't happening to you," she explains sincerely.

"Thanks Mo- Lore," Rory blushes. "That's going to take some getting used to."

Their attention is diverted by a knock at the door. It opens and Emily walks in followed by two nurses: one in pink scrubs, one in green.

"They are going to take you to your new room now Lorelai," her mother tells her.

"Oh joy," Lorelai responds sarcastically. She looks over at Rory and smiles brightly while the nurses move to help her out of bed.

"Okay we're going to move very slow," the nurse in the pink scrubs tells her. She pulls down the metal bar and then begins pulling back the blankets on the bed exposing Lorelai's bruised legs. The nurse in the green scrubs retrieves a wheel chair from the hallway and brings it close to the bed.

Pink scrubs nurse takes a second to disconnect Lorelai from all the equipment she is hooked up to and brings her IV pole around by the wheel chair while the other nurse helps Lorelai get her legs off the bed and onto the floor. "We're going to stand up on the count of three, okay?"

Lorelai takes a deep breath as each nurse takes one of her arms and one of them counts down. "1-2-3…"

"Ahh…" Lorelai cries out as they bring her to a standing position. She whimpers as they let her take a second to adjust to her weight. She breathes deep and nods for them to continue but cries out again as they lower her into the chair.

Rory watches as the nurses assist her mother from the bed to the chair and wheel her out. "I'll get her stuff," Rory offers to her grandmother.

Emily nods, "Very well, the room is on the fourth floor. 412," she says before following behind her daughter.

They are just hooking Lorelai back up as Rory walks through the door. "You need to get some rest Lorelai," Emily is telling her daughter. "You have more doctors to see tomorrow."

Lorelai nods and yawns, "I'm kinda tired anyway," she shrugs. "Are you staying?" she asks looking over to Rory.

"For the night," her daughter says nodding. "I have to work on a paper for my Russian Lit. class, that won't keep you up, will it?"

"Nah," Lorelai waves as she settles into her pillow trying to get comfortable around her cast, "we're good."

Rory grins, "Good!"

"Rory?" Emily interrupts.

"Yes grandma?"

"We need to talk."

"We do?" she asks wondering what needs to be addressed this time.

"Yes, outside please," her grandmother insists.

"Alright," Rory agrees. She glances over at Lorelai who is now only semi conscious. "Goodnight."

"Night," Lorelai mumbles in response.

Rory smiles and follows her grandmother outside. They take a seat on the bench in the hall.

"Hey Grandma, what's up?"

Emily sighs and looks down at the stack of papers in her lap. "I've been talking to the doctors," she begins and Rory's heart drops in panic.

"Everything is okay, right?" she inquires quickly.

"Yes, everything is fine, it's just…She'll start Physical Therapy tomorrow and Dr. Thomas thinks that at the rate she is going and depending on how she does tomorrow there is no reason why she can't be released by the end of next week."

"Wow!" Rory exclaims excitedly. "Grandma that's great."

"It is but we need to decide what to do with her once she gets out of here."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean- your mother isn't going to want to come home with me, that much I know," Rory nods in agreement. "And you cannot take any more time off from school if you want to graduate on time." Rory sighs and shuffles her weight. She honestly hadn't thought that far into the future. "And your house-"

"What's wrong with our house?" Rory asks slightly offended at her grandmother's tone.

"Nothing is wrong with it," Emily assures her quickly, "I know that you and your mother put a great deal of time and effort into it and I really can appreciate that. However, she is pregnant and in three and a half months there will be a new baby here."

"I know that," Rory interjects defensively.

"All right, then you can see that your house isn't big enough for the three of you. It's hardly big enough for the two of you."

Rory cuts her off, "Grandma what are you suggesting?"

"Well a few months ago when I had my eye surgery I took Lorelai to a real estate office and showed her a property that your grandfather and I planned to purchase as a wedding present for her and Luke. Of course you know how that turned out," Emily rolls her eyes, "but I called Lorene, my agent, and she told me that the house is still on the market. It's still available. There is an offer on the table but we can easily take care of that. The only problem is I have to move on it quickly," Emily explains.

"You want to buy Mom a house?"

Emily nods, "Yes," she opens the folder on top of the papers on her lap and shows Rory a picture of the house. "Isn't it beautiful?"

Rory is rendered speechless for a second. "Yes, it's…um…very beautiful."

The older Gilmore woman smiles, "Your mother thought so too."

"She really liked it?" Rory asks.

"I think so," Emily answers honestly before looking down at the picture again. "It's five bedrooms, four and a half baths, it has a library, which made me think of you, and it has some property so Lorelai can have horses, she's always wanted horses… and I just think this whole situation will be much easier with a little more space." She takes a breath and goes on. "And I also realize that it's not in Stars Hollow but it's just outside Stars Hollow and I placed a call to man named …Taylor Doose…and he said he would see to it that town lines were rezoned so that you could have a Stars Hollow address."

Rory thinks about it still staring down at the picture. If they did this they would have to do it quickly. It would be much easier for to get Lorelai settled into one place instead of moving her home and then finding somewhere new. And her grandmother did have a point, Rory considers. There is absolutely no room for the new baby at their house, at least not if she still wants to live at home part time. Rory sighs.

"But who will take care of her?" she asks suddenly.

"What?"

"You never told me that,"

"Well I don't know Rory," Emily tells her granddaughter. "I was going to look into a day nurse but I'm sure you'll want someone there at night with her as well."

"Yeah," Rory sighs. "Maybe I should just take some more time off, I mean, it's not like graduating later is going to hurt me."

Emily's mind flashes back to the year before when her daughter came to her nearly falling apart over her own daughters decision to drop out of school. She clearly remembers the look in Lorelai's eyes as she pleaded with them to back her up, to help her keep her baby where she belongs. Emily looks back up to Rory and shakes her head in disagreement. "No, Rory, you know, that's not what your mother would want for you."

Rory scoffs in frustration, "I know Grandma, but I don't know what else to do, she's my mom, my best friend, I can't just abandon her."

"I realize that too," Emily sighs sadly. "She won't come live with me willingly Rory, not if she knows she has options and…I just don't want to see her unhappy anymore."

Rory nods, "Me either," she says quietly and then looks down at the floor.

"Rory!" The Gilmore girls hear causing them to jump. Rory glances down the hall following the voice that shouted her name while clutching her hand to her heart. She shuffles to her feet quickly and breathes a breath of relief to see that it's only Luke.

"God, Luke!" she cries. "You gave me a freakin' heart attack."

"Hey, I'm sorry," he replies. "I didn't mean to scare you. I was down stairs and they told me she'd been moved up here."

"It's alright," she tells him sadly sinking back into the spot beside her grandmother. "Is everything okay? I haven't seen you all afternoon."

Luke nods, "Yeah, everything is fine. I just had to go check on a few things."

"Oh!" Rory mumbles distractedly. "Mom's asleep."

Luke nods. He'd tried his hardest to get back after his meeting with Anna and checking on the diner but he knew that this would probably be the case. He looks up at the girl and her grandmother and takes note of the distant look on their faces. "What's wrong?" he asks them.

Rory brings her eyes to meet his and he can tell with this simple look that she is completely over whelmed. "Rory," he says putting his hand on her shoulder to comfort her.

"It's just… there's just a lot to think about," Rory answers.

Emily pats her granddaughter leg in an attempt to regain her attention. Rory looks over to her and watches as Emily slides the manila folder into her lap. "You think about it," the older woman says to the younger one. "I'm going to head home, your grandfather just got back and it's been awhile since I've had the opportunity to fire a maid," she jokes. Rory smiles at her attempt and leans over to hug her grandma. Emily accepts and returns the hug before standing up. "We'll see you tomorrow."

"Goodnight Grandma," Rory says standing up as well.

"Goodnight Rory." She smiles. Emily then looks over to the man standing beside her granddaughter and nods in her first actual acknowledgement of his presence since arrived. "Luke," she offers.

"Mrs. Gilmore," he returns. Emily shakes her and walks away taking one last look at the door that holds her broken daughter before going on to the elevator.

At least three minutes after the elevator doors close on her grandmother, Rory looks over to Luke who has taken the seat beside her. They sit back in their chairs, each processing their own thoughts when Rory reaches over and takes Luke's hand in her own. He gives it a gentle squeeze reassuring her that everything is going to be okay and she smiles.

"My Dad left," she confides. "He's taking my sister and moving to Paris."

Luke glances over at her. He hears that sound in her voice, the same one her mother gets when she needs to vent.

"Really?"

"Yeah, he's leaving too," she sighs. "Why is everyone leaving me, Luke?"

Her face crumples and she brings her hands up to her eyes. "Logan's gone, Mom's gone, and now Dad's going too." She sobs. "I mean, Logan's only working, and Mom didn't get into the accident on purpose but Dad was just starting to come around. He was just starting to be here for me and now...He didn't even tell me. I don't think he was going to."

Luke frowns at the sight of the girl falling apart beside him. "Hey," he says gently pulling her trembling body close to his. "You still got me kid," he tells her simply. Rory buries her face into his shirt and hangs on cries in the comfort of a man who has been more of a father to her than her own over the years.

She has no idea how much time has passed when she finally pulls away but Luke seems in no rush to let her go. "You okay?" he asks as she sits up.

She nods and moves her hands to wipe her face. Luke stands up and extends his hand to her. "Come on kid, let me buy you dinner," he offers. Rory nods again and lets him pull her up and escort her to the cafeteria.

When they are both seated with a club sandwich for Rory and a salad for Luke, he makes an attempt to speak to her again. "Do you want to talk about it?" he asks genuinely.

Rory shrugs. "Everything is just so…wrong," she confesses softly. Her voice hints that she's upset about more than just her father leaving.

"I know," he admits before giving her the chance to continue.

Rory pauses for a moment as if lost in thought and then opens her mouth, "She asked me to call her Lore," she snorts recalling her mother's words.

"Lore?"

"Yeah, it's what everyone called her in high school," Rory shares with a laugh. "She told me once that she only liked it because it made her sound bad ass and that's what she was going for at the time. She said that having a one-syllable name made her mysterious. I asked her why she stopped using it and she said that she didn't know who she was until I was born but once I got here it all became clear to her and she didn't have to be so mysterious anymore." She takes a bite of her sandwich and laughs again. "She said that my Dad never got the memo that she grew up."

"Does that upset you? That she asked you to call her that?" he asks.

Rory thinks about the question and then looks down at the table. "It probably wouldn't bother me so much if she wasn't having another baby," she answers truthfully.

"Why not?"

"I don't know, it's just like…she's starting over of something, I feel like the first pancake."

Luke understands her reference immediately and it hurts him to see her thinking that way, knowing it isn't true. "Rory your mom loves you very much," he tells her. "You have to know that!"

Rory looks up at him and smiles sadly. "Yeah I know, I just miss her, you know? I'm glad she's okay and she's being very nice about everything…considering, but…."

"She's not your mom," Luke finishes for her.

Rory shrugs without faltering her watery smile. "My grandma is freaking out about what's going to happen when she gets released."

"Why?"

"Well, she knows Mom is going to object to going home with her to Hartford and frankly I wouldn't blame her. That was six months of hell I wouldn't wish on anyone. Then Dad broke up with her and is moving across the world so he won't stay with her, and as much as I want to I can't stay in Stars Hollow to take care of her. I have to go back to school."

"Of course you do! You are not under any circumstances dropping out of Yale again," he says sternly causing Rory to giggle.

"Oh Luke, you big softy, you do care!"

"Of course I care, I care about the both of you."

The air around them turns serious, "Can I ask you a question?" she presses.

"Ask me anything."

"Do you still love her?"

Luke doesn't even have to think about the question before coming up with an answer. "Yes," he says and Rory can see in his eyes that he means it.

Rory nods, "I thought so."

"I'll take care of her," Luke says casually.

"What!?!"

"You were right about what you said yesterday," he starts to explain. "Everything got screwed up. If I would have married her like I was supposed to none of this would have happened."

Rory puts her sandwich down. "Luke, no!" she gapes. "I was just upset, I don't blame you!"

"I know you don't Rory, but I just want to take care of her. Please let me." He reaches out.

Rory nods understanding. "Okay Luke," she agrees, "I'll tell my grandmother it's settled."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome," Rory expresses. "You won't have to be there all day. Grandma is hiring a day nurse, so it'll just be at night."

"I can handle that," he says.

Rory looks to her right at the folder on the table and slides it over in front of him.

"What's this?" he asks opening it and peering down at the large white house.

"Mom's new house," Rory tells him cautiously.

Luke gives her a look that tells her that he's confused. "The crap shack isn't big enough for me, Mom, and the new baby," Rory clarifies. "And now you…"

Luke nods looking down at the document that annotates the house.

Rory bites her lip wondering if she should tell him that it was supposed to be their wedding present but decides against it. "It's pretty, right?" she says using the same methods of persuasion her grandmother had.

"Yes."

Rory smiles. "I want to get everything moved before Mom gets out of here."

"How long is that?"

"At least a week but probably more," she sighs, "I just don't know when I'm going to do it. I mean when I'm not here, I'm at school and…Oh My God!"

"What?"

"I have a paper to write!" she exclaims looking up to the clock on the wall.

"Look, you just tell me what you need done with the move and your mom and I'll handle it, just go study."

Rory smiles, "Thanks Luke, are you staying?"

"Ah…no," he admonishes. "I have some things to get settled out but I'll be back tomorrow."

Rory stands up, "Okay," she walks around to his side of the table. "And thanks."

"Anytime."

"I hope I see you before I go back to school but if not I'll call you and we can work out the details."

"Sounds good."

"Night Luke."

"Good night Rory."

***


	6. Feelings

**A/N: The votes are in baby Gilmore will be revealed. Luke and Lorelai will meet in the next chapter and then you can all rest easy. Enjoy.**

Feelings

Lorelai hears the beeping of the fetal heart monitor that is attached to her body and her eyes open to the blurry light of the morning. Her gaze falls to the window and she squints at the sight of the sun coming in through the glass. Groaning in protest to the gods of the wake-up call, she picks up the hand not weighted down by plaster and rubs at her eyes wiping the sleep away. Her hand then falls to her stomach as she takes a good look around the new room. She was so tired by the time she made it in here last night she immediately opted for sleep, taking no time to take in its decor. It has more windows than the room in intensive care did, it's also slightly bigger, but besides that there isn't much difference. She relaxes and turns her head on the pillow and notices for the first time the sleeping figure on the windowsill.

_Rory, _she thinks and smiles. Her daughter is fast asleep, head resting on the cold glass with book spread across her lap. Even asleep she looks exhausted and that makes Lorelai unbelievably sad.

She can't explain the connection she feels to the girl, but she knows there's a lot she's missed out on. She just wishes she could remember. Closing her eyes tight, she does her best to think. To come up with some memory, an image from the past, anything… but comes up blank. Her mind is cloudy, if not from the fatigue then from the morphine. Frustrated she opens her eyes finding herself a little dizzy and forming a nice headache.

Lorelai looks to the window again, this time past Rory. The sun is shining and more than wanting to remember everything she wants to be out there. Being locked up in this hospital is like being in a maximum security prison for someone so independent, at least someone as independent as she thinks she was.

She tries to be strong and not think about the negative…at least she is alive, right?

Yes.

She knows she's lucky but she can't help but think about the world going on around her and how much she wants to be a part of it.

With no one to talk to…to confide in, she is confined to her head. Another form of entrapment. And as much as she wants to bring herself to trust these people she just can't seem to do it.

She has to figure things out on her own because relying on others to tell her means only getting half the story.

Lorelai's gaze falls to the cast on her right arm as she contemplates what Christopher told her the day before. He said that he couldn't be with her because her baby isn't his. It belongs to someone else. She can't help but wonder why that someone else has yet to make an appearance.

_Luke._

That's what they called him.

_That's a nice name_, she thinks turning the name over in her mind wondering if it's short for something else. Lucas. She smiles.

Then she remembers the way they said _ex._ Like there was something not definitely over there, the way it would usually be with an ex. She knows there is a story there and she is determined to find it, if only she could get out of this damn bed.

She huffs exasperated and falls back on her pillows with a thud. Realizing the noise she looks over to see if she's woken Rory and sighs in relief when she knows that she hasn't.

Her mind wanders away again, taking her someplace warm where she can feel the sun on her face and skin. She can almost hear the waves crashing in the distance at Harvey's beach. She can see the Emilio Estevez look-alike at the snack stand. Her memory of her fourteenth summer makes her shiver but she keeps her eyes closed trying not to lose the image all the while promising herself that as soon as she pops she is going to go to the beach and do cart wheels.

_What the hell…_She jumps and her eyes snap open. Another roll in her stomach tells her that she didn't imagine it. What she just felt wasn't a fluke.

It moved.

She gasps willing it to do it again and even goes so far as to poke her lower abdomen but her efforts come up short.

A sound interrupts her. Girls Just Wanna Have Fun is playing. She looks around trying to figure out where it's coming from as Rory is jolted awake by the same sound. The younger Gilmore girl topples out of the windowsill, books and all, and lands less than gracefully on the cold ground.

"Are you okay?" Lorelai asks.

Rory groans in exhaustion and makes no move to pick herself up. "Rory!" Lorelai says in a panic.

"I'm okay," her daughter mumbles pulling herself up. She looks around at her scattered papers and sighs before starting to collect them. She picks up her books and pens and begins to put them away while Lorelai watches her sluggish motions.

"What's going on?" Lorelai asks when Rory finally has herself together.

"I…I um…my alarm…I have to go," she says barely coherent. She puts her hands over her face and rubs her eyes. She had a late night and only got a couple hours of uncomfortable sleep after finishing her paper. "I have…classes," she tries to explain. She pulls her cell phone out of her pocket and looks at the time and see that she's already a little behind schedule.

Her facial expression screams stressed out and Lorelai takes notice immediate. "Maybe you should get some coffee," she tries.

Rory laughs a tired laugh and nods in agreement. She sees her shoes on the floor and walks toward them.

"So you have class?"

Rory grumbles a little before answering. "Yes," she says plopping down in the chair to put her shoes on. "And I have to put in a personal appearance at the paper and I have to go home and get everything ready."

"Ready for what?"

Rory smiles shortly, "Nothing."

Lorelai takes the hint and decides to speak her concerns, "I know you think it's your job and everything but you don't have to take care of me," she says surprising Rory.

"What?"

"I mean, I'm a grown up, right? And this is my mess."

"Mo-"

"And you have your own life. It's not fair that you just give up on everything. I bet you have friends and a boyfriend and so many other things that you should be worrying about."

"Logan's in London and my friends understand, look, I want to be here," Rory assures her.

"I know that, but you don't have to be here all the time. You said we're close and I believe that, so I'm asking you to please take a break. Stop worrying so much. Just go back to school and stay there for a while. Take some time for you."

Rory smiles and nods hope brimming in her eyes. "I promise, I'll try and relax soon."

"That's all I ask."

Rory stands up and retrieves her purse to bring over to the bed. When she reaches Lorelai she reaches inside the black bag and pulls out her Sidekick. "Here," she says offering it to her.

"What's this?" Lorelai asks taking the object for her own.

"It's your cell phone," Rory supplies.

Lorelai looks up at her like she has grown an extra head. "Here," she says taking it back. Lorelai hands the device back over and Rory walks around to the other side of the bed. "Scootch over," she requests.

Lorelai obliges and Rory takes a seat on the bed beside her. "Look." She puts her finger in the bottom corner of the screen and pushes it up. "This is how you open it." Lorelai gasps when the screen spins around with a pop.

Rory puts her thumb over the mouse and continues to explain how the phone works. "And this is your phonebook," she shares, "You won't really need it yet because everyone you know is in your five."

"My five?"

"That's right, look." Lorelai returns her attention to the phone. Rory presses a button and five colorful icons with the names of people underneath them appear on the screen.

_Rory_

_Mom_

_Dad_

_Luke_

_Sookie_

"If you need me all you have to do is use this," she slides her thumb over the mouse in demonstration, "to highlight the smiley face icon. Once it's highlighted you can click it with the mouse for options or you can press the green button and it'll call me."

"Really?" Lorelai asks.

"Yes really."

Lorelai takes the phone back in her hand and stares at it with a wild mischievous grin. "This is so cool!" she exclaims clearly amused.

"I'm glad you like it," Rory laughs but notices the time again. "And I have to go or I am going to miss my opportunity for a shower."

"Okay," Lorelai nods in understanding. She smiles brightly for Rory masking her disappointment and fear of being alone.

"Grandma and Grandpa should be here soon," Rory tells her.

Lorelai rolls her eyes, "Great."

"Be nice," Rory scolds playfully gathering her things. "They mean well."

"Yeah, so did Hitler."

Rory shakes her head, "Some things never change."

Lorelai laughs, "Bye."

"Bye," Rory returns, "Oh and enjoy your toy."

Lorelai looks down at it, "Trust me, I will."

"And if you need me?"

"I'll call. But I won't."

"I know, but if you do…"

"If I do," Rory sighs and gives her mother a small wave before walking out the door and heading toward her car. She really does have a full day ahead of her and it's going to start with making some phone calls on her way to school. She gets in the car and pulls out of the parking lot while the phone rings, calling her grandparents to let them know what she's decided.

* * *

Anna walks into the diner with a manila envelope in her hand. Luke looks up from behind the counter, sees her and smiles. He wasn't expecting her till later but he's glad she came in because he has to talk to her about what he discussed with Rory and what that will mean for April.

"Hey," she says simply when she sees him looking at her.

"Hey," he replies. "I didn't expect you till later."

"I know," she sighs, "but I wanted to go over April's schedule before I brought her by."

"Okay," Luke nods knowing he desperately needs to talk to her too.

"Is this a good time?" she implores.

"Sure," Luke nods, "let's sit." He leads her over to a table on the far side of the diner and they take a seat.

"Great," Anna sighs nervously, but doesn't speak again until she is seated. "So, this is her schedule," she says bluntly. "I think I erred on the side of too many details.

"I like details," Luke assures her.

Anna looks at him reluctantly, "These are some of the phone numbers you might need – pediatrician, dentist, orthodontist…" she goes on to explain, "in case her retainer breaks –optometrist…."

"In case her glasses break," he fills in for her.

She smiles and nods. "So, my mom has her back surgery on Monday but, apparently, the recovery process is really slow, so I'm going to be in New Mexico for at least two weeks," she tells him.

"It's fine," Luke assures her, "April can stay with me as long as you need her to."

Anna's smile widens, "Thanks. I really appreciate this."

Luke smiles back, "Alright so what's this packet?" he asks wondering about the envelope.

"Right," Anna nods, "registration forms, some waivers… April will need to have this when she goes to school tomorrow. And she will tell you she needs to be there at 7:30 but she really doesn't need to be there until 8:00. Anyway, it's all in the notes."

"Don't worry."

"I'm not worried," Anna chuckles. "Okay, maybe a little." She eyes him carefully. "It'll be fine?"

"It will be fine," Luke commits. "I promise."

"Good," Anna breathes a sigh of relief.

"But there is one more thing we need to discuss before you go," he says quickly before he has the chance to lose his nerve.

"What's that?" she asks.

"It's about Lorelai," he tells her honestly.

"What about her?" she wonders confused.

"She's pregnant," he says.

Anna looks down at the table, she wasn't expecting that.

"She's five months pregnant and it's mine."

"And it's okay?" she asks remembering the car accident.

"Yeah, it's okay, but the point is that she's going to be getting out of the hospital soon and I'm going to live with her. I'm going to take care of her."

"Oh Luke," Anna sighs shaking her head and looking down at the table.

"I'm just trying to be up front with you Anna," Luke tells her. "No more bullshit."

Anna looks back up.

"This doesn't change my relationship with April, she can still come and stay with me and this won't affect my ability to care for her but I thought you should know. I didn't want you to think that I was just blind siding you."

Anna doesn't know what to say, "I…uh…appreciate that Luke."

"It's going to be okay," he says putting his hand over hers.

"Are you sure Luke? I mean this is a lot of responsibility."

"I know, but it's my responsibility, April and Lorelai, they are my responsibility."

Anna stands up slowly, "Okay," she mutters barely audible.

Luke stands up with her, "So I'll see you and April later?"

"Yeah," she nods, "You will."

He walks her to the door, "Later Luke."

"Bye Anna."

* * *

Emily and Richard walk into the hospital together. They enter their daughter's room to find her asleep and take the seats near her bed to be close to her.

Richard examines her. She has regained most of her color, the bruises have faded, and the cuts have seemed too shrunk. She looks much more like herself than she did the last time he saw her and he silently thanks whoever is responsible for her miraculous recovery. He looks over at his wife's unhappy face.

"Don't be upset, Emily," he tries to soothe her.

"I just don't understand, they broke up, it was over," she rants.

"She is pregnant."

"I know that!"

"He is the child's father."

Emily shrugs, "I suppose."

"So we have to let this happen, or it'll be another sixteen years before we are allowed near this grandchild. And I know you don't want that," he tries to reason.

"Fine, I'll let it go…for now," Emily agrees. "I have to go see Lorene and pick up the keys and I guess now is as good a time as any since she's asleep. Rory wants everything done this week which means we have a lot to do."

"I'll sit with her," Richard says. "It's been awhile since I've spent some quality time with my daughter."

"Well I'll leave you to that," Emily smiles and stands up, "I'll be back before the physical therapist gets here." She leaves and Richard looks down at Lorelai.

He looks over at the books on her nightstand and assumes that Rory left them for her mother's entertainment. He picks one up and opens it, thinking he can get in a little reading while he waits for her to wake up.

Lorelai sighs, glad that she let herself get a couple more hours sleep after she got frustrated with trying to figure out the Sidekick. She was getting uncomfortable lying in the same position after so much time, and that is what woke her. She opens her eyes and the first thing she sees is her father. Shocked, she waits for him to notice her.

As if cued, Richard looks up from his book to find two bright blue eyes staring at him. "Lorelai," he says putting the book down and moving to the edge of his chair.

"Dad," Lorelai responds still a little groggily, "Where have you been?" she asks.

"Prague," he answers honestly while mentally screaming at himself for not being here when she woke up. "I'm sorry," he tells her.

"For what?"

"For not being here."

Lorelai narrows her eyes at him and finds him to look sincere. "S'okay." She shrugs.

Their moment is interrupted by a knock at the door. A nurse pushes it open. In fact it was one of the nurses that helped Lorelai to her new room the night before but she never got her name. Her scrubs were decorated with Ms. Piggy today instead of just plain green like yesterday. She smiles at Lorelai as she pushes the heavy machine through the door.

"Hi," she says cheerfully.

"Um, hi," Lorelai responds.

A second later another person enters. This time a woman in a while lab coat. She is reading from the folders in her hand and stands in the room for a full thirty seconds before she even acknowledges the other people in the room.

"Hello, Lorelai," she smiles.

Lorelai rolls her eyes. "Another doctor," she states rather than asks.

"Yes, I'm Dr. Roberts, your obstetrician."

"Wonderful," Lorelai says while rolling her eyes.

"How are you feeling?" the doctor asks ignoring her patient's sarcasm.

Lorelai folds her arms across her chest and shrugs. She's tired of seeing doctors. She is tired of people knowing her while she has no clue who they are. She hates this entire situation and cooperation is low on her list of priorities.

"Come on Lorelai, this will all go a lot easier if you'd just participate," Richard cajoles.

"He's right," Doctor Roberts adds, "we get this over with and then you won't have to see me again until next month."

Lorelai glares at them both and then gives up with a sigh. "Fine." She drops her arms.

"Good." The doctor smiles. "So again… How are you feeling?"

"Fine, I guess," Lorelai offers still clearly aggravated.

The doctor walks up to the side of the bed and lets it back so that Lorelai is lying down completely, then removes the blanket so that only her lower half is covered and pulls her hospital gown up enough to expose her stomach. Richard stands up and moves to the other side of the bed so that he doesn't get in the doctors way and leans against the wall.

Lorelai moves her IV'd arm behind her head and relaxes the other at her side as Dr. Roberts begins to gently press on her abdomen causing the same stomach flutter she'd felt this morning. She gasps and the doctor grins. "Feel that?" she asks. Lorelai can only nod. The woman removes her hands and looks to Richard. "We are going to do the pelvic exam now, so I am going to ask you to step out of the room sir." Richard immediately begins moving toward the door without hesitation. "It'll only take a few minutes, and then you can come back for the ultra sound if you want," she offers.

Richard nods without turning around and exit's the room promptly.

* * *

Rory walks out of first class and pulls out her phone. She talked to her grandmother just before the class and she informed her that she picked up the keys and signed all the necessary papers and was now on her way over to the house to make sure everything was the she remembered it. Now she has to call Luke to let him know that her grandmother will be bringing him a key sometime in the near future.

It rings for only a second before the gruff voice answers. "Luke's"

"Luke, it's Rory."

"Hey, what's up?"

"Grandma got the keys and she's going to be brining you your copy in just a little while."

"Oh okay," he says. "Hey Rory?"

"Yeah?"

"April's going to be staying with me, that isn't going to cause a problem is it?"

"I don't think so, there are five bedrooms so that gives her one of her own, I don't see why it'd be a problem."

"Oh good."

"How long?"

"What?"

"How long is she going to be staying with you?"

"Oh um, couple weeks, maybe a little more."

"Okay," Rory responds coolly, silently hoping that April being around isn't going to cause Luke to ignore her mother again. "Talk to you later."

The bells over the diner doors chime, "Yeah, bye," Luke says and puts the phone back on the cradle.

He sees Anna carrying April's bags and April carrying a pillow and some disgusting looking plant. "Hey," she says with an instant smile.

"Sorry we're late. We were half way here and April remembered the avocado pit was still in the kitchen, so we had to go back," Anna explains.

April shrugs, "We had to make a pit stop," she jokes lamely.

Luke laughs.

"Hey honey," Miss Patty calls from her seat.

"Hi!" she responds with a wave.

"You remember Miss Patty," Luke says introducing them.

"Sure!" April agrees over enthusiastically.

"And Kirk," Luke adds pointing to the weird fellow at the counter.

"Yo," Kirk chimes.

"And Caesar," Luke goes on.

Caesar appears in the kitchen. "Hey April!"

Anna impatiently looks down at her watch and looks up to Luke, "Look I hate to have to rush, but I actually have to rush."

"That's fine. You go," Luke waves her off.

Anna and April share a quick hug before April speaks. "Bye, Mom."

"Ooh, Love you sweetie," Anna tells her.

"Say hi to grandma," April says as her mother turns away.

"I will," her mother promises. "I'll call you when I get there." She turns around and looks to Luke. "Take care of her," she warns.

"I will," Luke nods.

"Okay, then." Anna takes one last look around. "Bye."

After a moment of Luke and April awkwardly standing around, the silence is broken. "So, is there somewhere I can put the pit down?" she asks.

"Oh, you know what?" Luke stammers seeing a familiar figure through the window, "Go on upstairs, and I'll bring the bags."

"Okay," April agrees and disappears behind the curtain just as the bells above the diner door chime.

"Hello Luke," Emily says coldly.

"Mrs. Gilmore," Luke replies as she starts to pull something out of her purse.

"I'm assuming you are still going along with this plan my granddaughter has concocted."

"Yes, I am."

Emily huffs, "Fine." She pulls the key out and hands it over to him.

"Thank you," he says accepting it.

"Yes well," Emily sighs, "I guess I should get back to Lorelai."

"Yeah," Luke nods. "Can I um…can I see her…sometime? Maybe tomorrow?" he asks.

"You want to see Lorelai?"

"Yes, I mean I'm going to be living with her when she gets out of the hospital so I suppose it's inevitable, but I'd like to sooner rather than later."

"Fine," Emily replies shortly. "Tomorrow, around noon good for you?"

"That's great." He can't help but smile.

Emily nods, "Goodbye, Luke," she calls as she turns away and without waiting for him to reciprocate she leaves.

* * *

Dr. Roberts lets the bed up a little once the internal exam in compete. "Let Mr. Gilmore back in," she says to the nurse who is hooking up the sonogram machine. When the task is complete she opens the door and tells Richard that it's all clear and he slowly reenters the room.

"Everything's good," she tells him as he approaches Lorelai's bedside again. He looks down at Lorelai but can't read her expression as she lays in the same position he left her in.

The doctor turns the machine and sits down, "Get the light, Karen," she calls to the nurse as a small grey light fills the room. The nurse closes the shades on the window as well so that the screen is clearly visible.

The doctor looks at Lorelai, "Have you decided if you want to know?" she asks.

"Know what?" Lorelai answers confused.

"The sex of your baby?"

"Oh," Lorelai looks down. She hadn't really thought about finding out. She was curious, yes. Lorelai looks back up and confidently responds, "Yes."

"Okay then," Dr. Roberts nods. "This is going to be a little cold." She tells her referring to the gel in her hand.

Richard watches as the clear substance is placed on his only daughter's swollen stomach and turns his attention to her face. As he watches her she watches the screen and Richard notes the change in her expression from annoyed to something he can't quite place as an image appears.

"That," the doctor points to the black and white image, "is your baby."

Richard tears his eyes away from her to get the first glimpse at his grandchild.

"Wow," Lorelai mutters much in the same way she figured out Rory was her daughter. "There really is a person in there," she says to herself.

"Indeed," Richard finds himself answering.

Lorelai looks over to him remembering his presence. "So?" she asks impatiently "Can you tell?"

"Hold on." Dr. Roberts readjusts the wand. "Okay, got it, you sure you want to know?"

Lorelai doesn't even take a second to think about it. "Yes," she says.

"Well, shop blue Ms. Gilmore," she says with a smile. "It's a boy."


	7. Meetings

**A/N: I need to know what you guys think of this chapter. I really hope you aren't at all disappointed. **

Meetings

Lorelai stares at the little black and white print off the doctor gave to her while lost in thought about meeting the little guy inside the photo. She doesn't know what to do. She doesn't know anything about little boys…or little girls for that matter. More importantly she can't remember how she did it the first time. Rory says she was such a good mother and that even though they had nothing she gave her daughter everything. How is she supposed to duplicate that? She runs her finger against his little outline and then puts the picture down.

She is alone again, her father having left to go find himself something for lunch and giving Lorelai a little time to herself. She remembers him telling her that she only had about an hour before it was time for physical therapy and she should rest up.

She sighs realizing that she is completely bored out of her mind. She hates this hospital with its stupid four walls all the same dull beige color.

She wants to call Chris and get him to come and help her break out, but she knows he won't. That's not what grown-ups do. Not how they should behave. Besides he has a life now and so does she. At least she did. She thinks she did.

She had to have had a job….a house….a car….

She wonders about her life, the one she left behind, and hopes that one day she can get back to it.

Her life.

The one that everyone else seems to be running for her.

It bothers her. Immensely.

Them planning around her the way they are. Deciding things about her that she should be deciding. They must think that when she lost her memory she also lost her mind. That she doesn't know what they are doing every time they step outside to "talk". That she doesn't understand that they are talking about her, in code, on the phone.

The more Lorelai thinks about it the angrier she gets. Who the hell are they to make decisions for her? Without her input! She stops fuming long enough to wonder why she hasn't called them on it yet. Why she hasn't told them to butt the hell out and leave her the hell alone? That she'll figure it out, just like she always does.

_I hate my life!_ She thinks and sighs in frustration.

* * *

"Order people!" Taylor yells to the small crowd gathered for the meeting in Miss Patty's dance studio as he bangs his gavel on the hard wood. "Order!"

"What's this about Taylor?" Gypsy asks from her seat.

Everyone is gathered for an emergency town meeting. Announced by Kirk, ordered by Taylor, and arranged by Luke.

He needs help.

Sometime after Emily left and he went upstairs and helped April unpack while explaining everything to her. Then he received a frantic call from Rory telling him she's stuck in New Haven for the next two days. She can't come home and pack up their house. Not now at least, and if she waits it'll be even longer before everything is settled in the new house and she just wants everything to be over with.

So she called Luke, and Luke called Taylor, and now he is about to ask for help from this crazy town.

"Luke, would you like the floor?" Taylor asks with a smile.

Luke grumbles at him but shuffles up to the podium anyway and looks out into the crowd of his friends.

"Um, hi," he begins slowly. "So um… I guess you all are wondering why you've been summoned today…I mean I know today isn't a Thursday and I know you all may have had other plans but…."

"Just get on with it Sugah!" Babette rasps.

"Okay…I need help… with a project."

"I'll help!" Kirk volunteers.

"What's the project, honey?" Miss Patty asks.

"I need help packing up Lorelai's house," he answers honestly.

The people immediately break out into simultaneous chatter amongst themselves.

"_Lorelai's moving?"_

"_Is she leaving Stars Hollow?"_

"_What's going to happen to her house and the inn?"_

"Order! Order people!" Taylor calls out again.

They quiet down and Luke speaks again. "She's moving to a bigger house and Rory has to stay at school and she is still in the hospital and I just can't get everything moved by myself by the end of the week."

"Of course we'll help Luke," Miss Patty tells him solemnly.

"Yeah we will," Babette adds. "How is the angel, anyway? You don't never tell us nothin' doll!"

"She's good…I think…I haven't seen her since Thursday, but I'm going to see her tomorrow and I'll know more then."

"What do you need us to do?" Lulu asks.

"Well I mostly just need the house packed up. The whole house and then some help moving everything for the old house to the new one."

"When?" They all wonder.

"I was hoping we could start tomorrow morning."

* * *

Lorelai finds herself in a wheel chair being pushed by a nurse to a different floor to see her physical therapist. Her mother walks at a quick pace behind her. Lorelai, of course, is still insanely livid at everyone around her and hasn't said one word to anyone in hours.

The elevator dings on the second floor and Lorelai almost immediately reaches her destination. When the chair comes to a stop there is a chipper young blonde waiting for her, and Lorelai, being in the mood she's in, can't help but roll her eyes distastefully.

The girl sits down with Lorelai and Emily.

She speaks. "Hi I'm Kelly."

"Hello Kelly, I'm Emily Gilmore and this is my daughter Lorelai."

She smiles. "Ah yes, Lorelai Gilmore, we've been expecting you."

Lorelai stays blank faced as the girl begins to flip through the chart in her hand. She studies them for a moment and then speaks again. "According to this you didn't suffer from anything too traumatizing in your accident. I mean besides the break in your arm." She turns the page. "Nope, no leg damage or major spinal cord injuries. So I guess we just need to find out what we're working with."

Lorelai narrows her eyes at the girl wondering if she is serious or not.

"I think we should try to get you walking." She stands up and reaches out for Lorelai's hands.

Lorelai scowls at her and snaps, "I can do it myself." She steadies the chair by putting her feet flat on the floor and then uses all of her strength to push herself up ad bring herself into a standing position.

She flinches from the pain but doesn't falter. She has to prove to them that she can do this. That she isn't as incompetent as they think she is.

She knows she can't just stand there forever and takes hold of her IV pole to move forward. She almost stumbles but everyone moves to catch her. "I'm fine!" she tells them pulling herself back up.

She takes another step and wobbles but moves forward nonetheless. She knew she could it. Ignoring the shooting pain she smiles to herself in satisfaction and stubbornly takes another step.

* * *

The morning comes around quickly. Luke gets up at his normal time to open the diner and then helps get his daughter ready when it's closer to time for her to go to school. He packs her lunch and watches her leave with the car pool and then hurries off to Lorelai's house. Luke and his assembled crew meet up at the crap shack as promised. They map out a plan.

He and Sookie will take Lorelai's room.

Having gotten Rory's permission, Lane and Zack will pack Rory's room.

Miss Patty and Babette will take the living room and the kitchen.

Kirk, Jackson, Gil, Brian, and Andrew will begin moving the large furniture into the moving van.

And Gypsy and Lulu would take the bathrooms and hall closets.

Luke doesn't have very long. It's already eight am and he has to be at the hospital by noon. So they get to work. With so many people working it really doesn't take long. Luke and Sookie begin packing Lorelai's things away into boxes and marking them with a bright red LR. They get all of her pictures and books down and then Sookie moves over to the closet and Luke heads over to the night stand. He opens the drawer surprised to find a think bound black book. _I've never seen this before_, he thinks as he opens it to a random page near the back.

It reads:

_April 28, 2006_

_He forgot my birthday._

_It was yesterday. (April 27__th__)_

_Mom and Dad called, and Sookie of course made a big to do, but this has got to be one of the worst birthday's I've ever had._

_I'm not stupid._

_I knew that birthday week would be more different this year than it ever has been, with Rory and I still working things out and her with Logan all the time, but still._

_I get it, she's busy. She has a boyfriend, a life, a hell of a lot of schoolwork to catch up on and that's fine. That's where I want her, at school studying where she belongs._

_She called me this morning too and wished me a Happy Birthday and then promised that we would do it up right over the weekend. I agreed. It was only fair, her birthday also came belated this time around._

_But Luke…_

_I mean I know he's been busy with April._

_But I never thought he'd forget my birthday._

_I wish I could have taken a picture of his face yesterday morning when I walked into the diner. Immediately I was greeted by people wishing me a happy 38th. (Ugh! Let's not discuss it.) and then I sat down at the counter and waited and but when he appeared from around the curtain he just grabbed the coffee pot and offered me some. No rant, no lecture, no flirting. Just 'Coffee?' And that's it_

_Then Kirk plopped down beside me and asked me how it felt to be another year older, and that's when it dawned on him. I could see it in his face. Of course being Luke he tried to cover it. Play it off. But I can see through that._

_I know he felt bed._

_Then he disappeared into the kitchen (to check his calendar I suppose) and returned a while later with my birthday breakfast, like he planned it that way all along._

_But I know better._

_After the festivities were finished he took me home and we had sex. We haven't had sex in months. Not since February. Not since Martha's Vineyard. God, I can almost count it down to the day. (Feb 12.) How nympho is that? Maybe Jackson's brother was right about me._

_Anyway, now I'm sitting here in my room in an empty bed at 4 in the morning because he couldn't stay (Early Deliveries). That's really what he said. This time last year we hardly spent a night apart, and now it seems like it's a hassle to be together._

_Every since that birthday party we threw for April a couple weeks ago he's been spending less and less time here (Stupid Anna! Yes, I know, it's not Anna's fault, but still!). And then I feel bad when he is here because it seems like he doesn't want to be._

_He doesn't want to share a bed with me._

_He doesn't want to share his kid with me._

_And I'm starting to wonder._

_Does he even really want to be with me?_

_This really sucks! And I'm going to sleep._

_Lorelai_

_P.S. Happy Birthday!_

Luke shakes his head in disbelief. Tempted to reread the page just to be sure he read it right, but there is no need, it's burned into his brain. He closes the book and stares down at the cover realizing that he's just accidentally stumbled upon her diary and instantly feels bad.

He wasn't trying to snoop but after reading that page he can't help but want to know more. When did she start feeling this way? How long did it last before she cracked? How many details did she actually include? How did he not see it? He knows he has all the answers in his hands but he can't bring himself to betray her trust like that. Not again. He decides to return it to her and puts it down in a safe place so it won't get lost in the shuffle as he finishes his packing.

* * *

Luke steps into the hospital cleanly shaved and flannel free clutching a bouquet of daises. He can't wait to see her again…awake.

He steps onto the elevator and finds himself on the fourth floor. He wonders if her mother is around seeing as she told him to be here at noon, but surprisingly there is no Emily to be found.

He wanders over to the nurse's station, "Lorelai Gilmore's room?" he asks.

A red headed woman smiles up at him and points to a door close to the far end of the hall.

He returns the smile. "Thank you."

He approaches the wooden structure takes a breath and knocks hard.

"Come in," he hears her muffled voice call.

"Lorelai?" He says as he steps into her room.

"Did you figure that out all by yourself, or did my name on the dry erase board outside the door clue you in?" she asks snottily.

He doesn't answer.

"And you are?"

He remembers her memory lapse. "Luke Danes," he answers coming closer to the bed.

She nods. She figured it was him. Emily told her yesterday that he was going to be stopping by.

"These are for you," he says holding the flowers out for her and she can't help but smile.

"Daisies?" she asks reaching out for them. "I love daisies."

"I know," Luke nods. "May I sit?"

Lorelai shrugs and puts the flowers on the table beside her. _So this is the mysterious Luke,_ she thinks to herself. _He certainly has beautiful eyes._

"I can't believe you're here," she says breaking the silence. "I mean, they said we broke up."

"We did," he confirms.

"Aren't you supposed to hate me?"

"I can't," he shrugs, "and trust me I've tried."

Lorelai frowns.

"I brought you something," he says.

"Besides the flowers?"

"Yes."

"What?" Luke pulls the diary out of the bag.

"Here," he says as he offers it to her. "It's your diary."

"How did you get my diary?"

"I found it."

"You were just walking around and It was lying on the ground somewhere?"

"It was in the drawer of your nightstand beside your bed."

"In my house?"

He nods.

"And you were in my house because…."

"I was doing a favor for Rory."

"A favor that involved you going through my drawers?"

"Yes."

"Did you read it?"

"A little…"

Lorelai stares at him, mouth agape.

"I didn't know what it was, but after I realized it was your diary I stopped."

Lorelai looks down at the book in her hands. She remembers when she started keeping a diary. She was fourteen and her English teacher told her she had a lot of pent up frustration. He could see it in her writing and then he gave her a book with blank pages and told her that it might help if she wrote in it. So she did.

"I can't believe I still keep a diary," she laughs.

"Just do me a favor and wait until I leave before you read it."

Lorelai nods and sets it down beside the flowers. "Why are you here?"

"Excuse me?"

"What do you want from me?"

Her questions surprise him and he finds he doesn't quite know how to answer.

"I don't want anything, I just… you have no idea what it was like seeing you like that," he told her. "I mean I know you don't remember but there are a lot of people who love you and wanted to see you get better."

She had to ask. "People like you?"

"What?"

"Do you love me?"

Luke takes a deep breath and nods, "I will _always _love you." He says, "It killed me seeing you so hurt, I just needed to see you smile."

She does. She smiles for him and for the first time in months it reaches her eyes. It isn't a smile put on to mask pain or to hide behind. It's a real Lorelai smile. "That's sweet."

Luke shrugs.

"I think I dreamed of you," she tells him.

"You did?"

Lorelai nods. "You're just so familiar, I mean I know I don't know you, but I do…you know?"

Luke laughs, "Not really but if you say so."

"I'm having your baby," she follows bluntly.

"I know," he nods.

"Is that why we broke up?"

"God no!" Luke jumps defensively. "Lorelai you have to know that it was nothing like that. I'm not like that. I didn't even know you were pregnant."

"Apparently no one did," she admits.

"Yeah well you haven't exactly been forthcoming these past few months."

"I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"For not telling you, that's not fair."

"You shouldn't be apologizing to me, I should be apologizing to you. I shouldn't have made you feel like you couldn't tell me." He sighs. "Besides you did tell me…right before _this_ happened."

"I did?"

"Yeah, you called me and said 'I'm pregnant' and then you said it was mine and not to worry because it didn't change anything."

"Oh," Lorelai looks down at her lap, "I want to know about us, what happened and stuff, but not now," she says. "Not today. I need to know, but my head is just kind of on information over load and I still need a little time to process."

He laughs. "Don't worry we have plenty of time."

Lorelai smiles again, "I feel so comfortable around you, it's weird, and I don't know if that's a good or bad thing."

"Probably a little of both."

"So you aren't mad that I'm pregnant?"

"Of course not. How could I be mad? You didn't do it by yourself."

Lorelai's smile gets wider. "Dirty!"

Luke rolls his eyes. "Well, If you're sure…" she says reaching for the picture on the table. She hands it to him.

"What's this?" he asks knowing good and well what it is.

"That is our son."

He stares at it for a moment and then looks up at her, "It's a boy?"

"It's a boy." She nods.

"Wow."

She giggles, "That's what I said."

He looks at the picture a few minutes longer and then notices her yawn.

"I'm sorry," she mumbles.

"That's okay, you're tired."

"Just a little, I had physical therapy again this morning and it just kinda takes a lot out of me."

He looks at his watch and sees he has to go get April anyway.

"Would you like me to come back and see you again?"

Lorelai nods, "I think so."

"Okay then." He stands up and hands her picture back to her.

"You keep it," she says quietly. "Put it on your refrigerator."

He smiles, and nods, whispers goodbye and leaves as she drifts off to sleep.


	8. Fears

**Hi, Sorry this one took longer than the rest but I have finals for the next two weeks so I've been studying like a crazy person. Really, I mean just hand me a book and call me Rory. Okay, maybe not but...I've been trying to get this finished for days but it just wouldn't let me stop. lol. Anyway, I hope you like it.**

Fears

Fear is described as an unpleasant feeling of anxiety or apprehension, caused by the presence or anticipation of danger. It is real and at some point, it can be overwhelming. Lorelai knows this all too well. They all do.

* * *

Rory stands in the doorway of her childhood home, alone. It's emptier than she can ever remember seeing it, as she steps inside. There are no pictures on the walls or on the mantel piece. The hand print collage she made is kindergarten is now on a different fridge. The knick knacks and collectable junk that would be spread out all over the place belongs to a new residence.

The living room is cold and dark. The electricity has just been cut off, so of course there are no lights, and despite the warm early fall sun shining outside, chills develop on her freckled skin. There is no real reason for this visit except that she just wants to walk around their home one last time. Of course they aren't selling it, so maybe, one day, they'll find another use for it and she can come again.

She stands in the middle of the living room and does a slow turn wondering if she should have brought a camera and then she hears….

"_No, I don't want to remember it like this."_

Her mother's words from the last time they walked through the Independence Inn together, right after it burned down and Mia sold it. It was empty and cold, much like the space she is standing in now, and her mother couldn't bear anything less than the warm atmosphere that helped her bring up her daughter.

"_Mom," eleven-year-old Rory called from the doorway of the downstairs bedroom of the house they were looking at. "Look at the size of this room, it's practically the same size as our whole apartment!"_

_Lorelai turned away from the realtor and sent a smile in the way of her young daughter._

"_Do you like it, Sweets?" she asked._

_Rory nodded her head vigorously and then disappeared back into the empty space. She looked around mapping out where she was going to put her bed and her books and her desk. She's never had her own bed, or room, or desk. So, this whole experience was new and exciting for her._

"_Can you give me a minute with my daughter, please?" she heard her mother ask when she walked back into what would become their living room._

"_Certainly." The old woman nodded and walked away allowing the Gilmore girls a chance to converse._

_Lorelai turned to Rory. "So…what do you think? Do you like it?"_

"_Yes," Rory said quickly._

"_Me too."_

"_Is this really the house we're going to get?"_

"_I hope so, Kid. I'm going to put in a bid as soon as Susan comes back in here."_

_Rory's face lit up. "And if we'll get it, we'll be right next door to Babette and Morey, and they said I can play with Cinnamon whenever I want."_

"_I know, how cool is that?"_

"_Do you think they'll be enough room for all my books?"_

_Lorelai rolled her eyes, "Seriously? You want to bring all your books, because I don't think we'll need a house, I think we'll need a whole library."_

_Rory shook her head, "I think it's perfect."_

"_Me too…" her mother laughed._

Rory smiles agreeing with her memory, she definitely doesn't want to remember it like this. She wants to remember the movies on the couch with pizza and Chinese food on a Saturday night; the crazy themed birthday parties in the yard inhabited by the even crazier characters of her childhood; and late night study sessions with open books lying all over the kitchen table. She wants to remember the way her home smelled consistently of coffee, every single morning.

Rory's smile is faltered by the realization that her mother doesn't remember any of these things, and she secretly fears that she never will again.

Shaking her head, the young woman moves on, up the stairs and into the first room on the left to the newly renovated empty space that Lorelai shared with Luke for a short period and then occupied alone. Rory hates that their stupid fight caused her to miss this chapter of her mother's life. She wonders how she could have been so stupid to take a home like this for granted.

She lingers in this room a while longer and then continues on, back down the stairs to her bedroom. The one she lived in from the time she was eleven until she was eighteen. She loves this room and this house and is almost sad to see it so empty. She looks at it from the center and can still picture her furniture as if it had never been taken away. The books on the shelves, the lamp on the desk, the comforter on the bed, she closes her eyes and savors the memory.

Her cell phone chimes notifying her that she has officially run out of time. She has to get back to hospital with the bag of clothes she packed for her mother waiting in the trunk of her car. She sighs and disables the alarm. She closes her bedroom door, exits the house, and locks the front door behind her.

* * *

Drops of water begin to hit the hard white floor of the shower as she turns the knob to left. This is the first shower that they've allowed her to take by herself and it's the last one she'll have in this place before they let her go home… _where ever that is_.

The nurse is drawing up her discharge papers. Once they've been signed she'll be free and clear.

They'll finally let her leave.

Still, Lorelai can't help but wonder what will happen after. When she steps foot on the pavement outside those double doors for the first time. After all, the world out there is far different than the one she left two decades ago.

She's scared.

Not that she would ever tell them that. She can't. They already expect too much from her.

From what she's heard they want fearless and strong, Lorelai Gilmore; mother, business partner, friend, _wonder woman,_ but truthfully she doesn't know how to be any of those things. She doesn't know how she pulled herself together the first time.

Regardless of her anxiety, she knows this day had to come at some point and she is almost just as glad to be rid of this god forsaken place. She takes off her gown and steps into the warm water. As leans back and lets the moisture trickle down her face she closes her eyes but a knock on the door interrupts her relaxation.

Her head snaps to the wooden structure that is opening. "Lore…" Rory calls.

"Yeah?"

"You almost done?" she asks. "I brought your clothes."

"Yeah, just, um, leave them."

"Okay," Rory sets the bag down just inside the door. "I'll be waiting right out here."

"You do that," Lorelai replies a little snappishly.

The door closes and she instantly regrets being so crabby. She just wanted a few minutes to herself. She pushes the thought away and lets her mind drift back to the time that has lapsed since she first woke up. Her brow furred in contemplation, she reflects on the things she has learned about herself. First and most importantly, she is a mother, to grown girl, and soon to a little boy. She was engaged for sometime to a man that she loved and he helped her to create that little boy. She has a home in a small town called Star's Hollow and owns her own business there. And she is thirty-eight years old. Lorelai wonders why her brain hasn't completely shut down from all the thinking it's been doing over this information alone.

Her mind wanders to Luke and she absentmindedly smiles. He was so nice to her and he brought her flowers…daises at that. Chris brought her flowers all the time but he always gave her roses. She remembers the last time Luke visited her. She was asleep…at first but the hospital beds are so uncomfortable that the rest never lasts long. She woke up when she heard the door open but she kept her eyes closed….

_She heard the door open and then the sound of shoes against floor and without opening her eyes she knew that it was him. She could just feel it. He sat down in the chair beside her bed and watched her. He thought that she was sleeping but he was content in just watching her._

_It reminded him of when he came that day after her accident and Rory was afraid to go in alone._

_He smiled recalling the feeling of her hand squeezing his. Slowly he reached out and gently took her palm for his own. At the slightest touch Lorelai's heart rate sped up. She felt weird having a man she hardly knows holding her hand but she liked the warm feeling it brought her. As his thumb moved in a circular motion against her skin she hoped she wasn't blushing at her own silly sensibility._

_Then, while maintaining his hold on her hand, his other hand moved to her swollen stomach. His touch was light, gentle, but enough for the baby inside her to turn flips, although she was sure it was something only she could feel._

Lorelai opens her eyes.

* * *

Rory looks around and decides to gather up her mother's things while she waits for the nurse to bring her the discharge papers. She looks around and notices things she can start to take to her car. She walks out to the nurse's desk and smiles. "Hi, um, I was just wondering if you guys have a box or something I can use to carry out my mother's things?"

"Sure, honey," the older woman replies. She gets up from her seat and walks away only to return a few moments later with a medium sized brown box. "Is this okay?"

"Perfect!" Rory says as she takes it. "Thank you so much," she finishes politely.

"You are very welcome." The nurse nods.

Rory takes the box back into the hospital room and starts to pack it up. She takes get well soon cards from the windowsill and then the books she brought from the nightstand. She packs the photo albums and the lose leaf pictures and then she packs the dying Daisies that Lorelai wouldn't let anyone touch. _The ones from Luke_. Rory smiles as she places them in the box and then she hears the water shut off in the bathroom. She starts to pick up the box to take it to her car but something catches her eye: the corner of a black book sticking out from underneath Lorelai's pillow.

The cover is blank and so is the spine. Curiosity gets the better of her and she flips it open to a random page near the front.

_August 20th 2005_

_The renovations on the house are almost finished and we're ready to paint. I am driving Luke crazy with picking colors. He says (more like rants) that the walls are ready to paint but if the workers don't have anything to paint then they don't make any money and they'll leave to go paint houses that provide money and then we'll never see them again. It's just so hard. And of course he is no help. I've been asking around. I asked Sookie, Babette, Andrew, Miss Patty, and although I did find some very nice colors for their homes nothing seems right for mine….hell I even consulted Paul Anka (he liked magenta) but I'm still at a loss._

_This is the type of thing I would consult Rory about but-_

"Um… Rory!" Lorelai calls stopping Rory from finishing the sentence she was reading.

She looks up, tearing her eyes away from the page. "Yeah?"

"Can you um… help me… please?"

Rory closes the book puts it down. She walks around the bed and over the bathroom door and puts her hand on the handle and pushes it open.

"I can't get dressed," Lorelai sighs generally frustrated.

Standing with her back to the fogged over mirror trying to hold her towel with her free hand she sees Rory and holds out her casted arm. "Can you help me get the bag off?" she asks referring to the garbage bag cover.

Rory laughs remembering the not so distant past when she too had to wear a cast for her fractured wrist and her mother wrapped it in saran wrap.

She nods. "Sure."

Lorelai watches as Lorelai unties the bag. "I'm sorry," she says. "For snapping at you earlier…I'm hormonal."

Rory waves it off but doesn't look up. "It's fine."

"You sure?"

"Sure, I didn't even think about it." Rory picks up the overnight bag and puts it on the counter and changes the subject. "I went through your clothes but there wasn't anything 'maternity' related so I hope this fits."

"What is it?"

"It's just sweats and a large t-shirt." Rory says. "I tried to find a big one."

"Okay well let's see then."

Rory opens the bag and pulls out the underwear she brought and helps Lorelai get them on, as uncomfortable as it makes them both.

"I'm sorry," the older Gilmore finds herself saying.

"For?"

"This is weird…there are a number of scenes from a Steven King novel I would reenact before I ever helped my mother do anything like this…."

"It's okay, really," Rory says as she reaches in the bag for the bra. "When I was thirteen you broke your leg and I helped you get dressed for the first couple days then too…Just until you got the hang of it."

"I broke my leg?" she asks disbelievingly.

"Yeah, about 9 years ago," the younger woman confirms.

"How'd I manage that?" Lorelai questions.

"Yoga," Rory states simply. "You were trying to out bend a blonde pretzel but don't worry you took her down with you." She glances up and sees discomfort written all over Lorelai's face. "Are you okay?" she asks her mother, after she snaps her bra.

"Yeah it's just…" Lorelai fades.

"What?"

"It's tight, really tight."

Rory frowns, "Yeah…I can see that,"

"My boobs must have gotten bigger," she says, her tone oozing with amazement.

"Well you're going to have a baby," Rory replies matter-of-factly.

"I know… I just can't believe she didn't buy maternity clothes," Lorelai muses aloud.

"She?" Rory questions, confused.

"Me, her, you know, Lorelai before…erg!…I could kick myself."

Rory tries to hide her expression. "Maybe we can adjust the straps. Can you turn around?"

Lorelai complies and turns toward the mirror but closes her eyes tightly as Rory plays with her bra straps. Rory starts to say, "We'll go shopping for new clothes this week-" but stops when she sees the face her mother is making. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Lorelai replies quickly.

"Why are your eyes closed?"

"It's stupid…" She maneuvers her body away from the mirror so that she is once again facing Rory who is pulling the over sized t-shirt from the bag.

Rory scrunches up the shirt and lifts it over Lorelai's head to help her put it on, "I doubt that," she says.

"Yeah well it is…I know it is, and I'm the one doing it," Lorelai replies as she pulls the tight white t-shirt with '_Lorelai'_ spray painted in pink across the chest down over her stomach.

"You still haven't told me why."

"I…just…I'm kinda freaked out by the mirror…."

"Watching too many late night sci-fi movies?"

"What?"

"Never mind. Why does the mirror freak you out?"

Lorelai sighs as she pulls up the sweat pants and answers honestly, "I'm afraid of what thirty eight looks like…"

Rory's mouth drops slightly but quickly recovers. "That's not stupid. It's a little…."

"Weird?"

"I was gonna say…Eccentric,"

"Cause that's better."

Rory shrugs and opens the bathroom door just as Dr. Thomas comes in with the clipboard.

"Hello ladies, all ready to go?"

Lorelai rolls her eyes, "Uh huh."

"Good." He hands her the clipboard and pen. While she signs, Rory walks around the bed to pick up the box.

"I just want to go over a couple of things with you two before you leave?"

"Like…" Lorelai draws out.

"Well for one thing I want you to get plenty of rest, no over strenuous activity, no lifting heavy objects, just kinda take it easy."

"Done," Lorelai says quickly. "Can I go now?"

Rory smiles at her mother's childish impatience.

The doctor goes over a few more things with them as Lorelai is forced into a wheel chair for her departure. A nurse pushes them outside while Rory carries the box.

"I'm going to go get my car, wait here, I'll be right back," the younger Gilmore girl says.

"Why can't I go with you?" Lorelai protests.

"Because, it'll be easier if I can just go get it and pull up here to get you."

The older Gilmore huffs but concedes. "You aren't going to drive off and leave me here are you?" she calls after her daughter.

As Rory walks through the parking lot her cell phone rings. Shuffling all her items to one arm, she pulls her cell out of her pocket and answers trying to hold the phone to her ear with her shoulder so that she can continue to walk.

"Hello?" she says breathlessly into the receiver.

"Hey Ace," she hears and an instant smile appears on her face.

* * *

The new house is all unpacked and ready for Lorelai's arrival. Still, Emily is running around like a chicken with her head cut off wanting everything to be perfect. She goes into the master bedroom upstairs the one that has been set up for her daughter and takes a look around.

It's twice as big as the room left back at The CrapShack but when they moved everything in they set it up the same way. She put sheer white curtains up over the French doors that lead out unto the balcony and Emily thinks it makes a nice touch. Nothing seems to be out of place so she closes the door and goes back down stairs to await their arrival.

* * *

Lorelai rubs her hand over her stomach as she sits and waits for her daughter to bring the car around. Enjoying the sun on her skin for the first time in a month she smiles, "So what do you think, kid? Are we gonna make it?" she asks her unborn son. "I don't know about you but….I'm not so sure." The baby moves and Lorelai laughs. "Is that your way of telling me that everything is going to be alright? I really hope you're right." The car pulls up and Rory gets out of the car with an unshakable smile on her face.

Lorelai stands up and Rory holds the passenger side door open for her. She helps her mother into the car and then walks around to her own side practically humming.

"You look happy," Lorelai comments as they pull out of the parking lot.

"Do I?" Rory beams.

"Yeah you have that 'here comes the sun' smile." Lorelai laughs.

"Can't I just be happy?"

"Sure…may I ask what caused this sudden change in mood?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean when you walked away you didn't have that goofy grin on your face."

"Well…my boyfriend called." Rory blushes.

"Boyfriend?" Lorelai smirks, "I should have known."

"Yeah, his name is Logan."

"That's a nice name," Lorelai shrugs unsure of what to say.

Rory laughs, "Yeah it is…"

"So why haven't you mentioned him before?"

"He just hasn't come up," Rory says quickly. "I don't know."

"Where is he?" Lorelai continues to inquire.

"He lives in London."

"London? Wow, so far?"

"Yeah, we were supposed to go to Asia over the summer but his Dad isn't a very nice guy and he made him leave the country for a year… to get his act together."

"Tough Love?"

"Very."

"So what did he say?"

"What?"

"On the phone?"

"Oh," Rory smiles remembering why she is so happy. "He's coming home. To visit."

"Wow, that's big."

"I know. I missed him so much."

"You seem really excited."

"I am…"

The conversation falls as the girls silently revel in their own thoughts. "Hey Rory?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you know anywhere we could get a taco?"

"A taco?"

"Yeah I'm just starving, and all I've had is nasty hospital food since I woke up and I really want a taco."

"Sure, there's a taco bell right down the street."

* * *

A car pulls up in front of the diner and a twelve-year-old girl gets out. "Bye Marcia, thanks again Mrs. Woods," she waves to her best friend and her Mom. They drop her off at the diner since Litchfield is so far out of the way as a favor to Anna.

When the car drives off the girl settles her backpack and enters her father's place of business.

"Hey Dad," she greets the man in flannel behind the counter.

"Hey, April," Luke says looking up at her. "How was school?"

She puts her book bag down and then climbs onto a stool. "It was good," she smiles. "My homework is super easy, and I got a new book from the library so I'm happy."

"That's great!"

"Yeah."

"So, Lane will be here in a few minutes and we can go," he says placing a grilled cheese sandwich in front of her. "I thought you might be hungry."

She smiles wearily, "thanks."

"No problem," Luke replies. He wipes down the counter as she picks at her food and then becomes worried. "Okay, what's wrong?"

"Nothing," she says quickly.

"April," he warns. His daughter sighs and then drops her sandwich on her plate.

"Lorelai is coming back today."

Luke's face falls, "I thought you liked, Lorelai."

"Oh I do," April assures him. "I mean I only met her twice but she seemed really cool both times."

"Then what's the problem?"

"I don't know, I just don't know what to expect I guess," she explains. "I mean Mom told me to keep my distance, because she lost her memory and she's pregnant, so she may be on edge, and I just don't know how to act around her."

"Oh April," Luke shakes his head. "I don't want you to tip toe around Lorelai. Yes, she has suffered a head injury that has impaired her memory. So, it may be a little hard for her at first but you don't have to change or hide or be nervous. She's still Lorelai."

April smiles, "Okay."

"Okay," Luke says relieved. "So finish up your sandwich so we can get out of here."

April nods.

* * *

Rory drives past a familiar sign and flashes a smile over at her mother in the passengers seat stuffing her face with her third taco. "Welcome home, Mom," she whispers.

"Hmm?" Lorelai asks with her mouth full.

"Nothing, I just said welcome to Stars Hollow,"

Lorelai looks up to see the town square. She swallows, "This is it?"

"This is it," Rory nods, "It's not much but…" she slows the car down, "look," she points to a large wooden structure, with a woman standing outside smoking a cigarette. "That is Miss Patty's dance studio and that lady is Miss Patty."

"Did you dance there?" Lorelai asks.

"Very badly," Rory laughs. "But I took a couple years of beginner's ballet, gymnastics, and cheerleading."

Lorelai nods.

"And over there, is Doose's market," Rory continues. "And that's his soda shop, over there, and next door is Luke's diner."

Lorelai's head stops at the sound of his name. "Luke's diner?" she repeats.

Her daughter notices the change in her expression and it makes her smile wider, "Yeah, that's where he works."

"That's cool," Lorelai says trying to play off her fascination.

"Anyway, over there is Weston's, this is the square, we have all the festivals and carnivals here."

"Seems like a nice place to grow up."

"It was," Rory agrees. She turns her attention to the street ahead of her and continues on five minutes down the road.

Lorelai watches the scenery change outside the window until the car slows again and pulls into the driveway of a large while house, with a wraparound porch. She gasps and then looks to her daughter. "What are we doing here?"

"This is your house," Rory replies.

"No it's not," Lorelai argues. "It can't be."

"What do you mean?" Rory asks.

"It's supposed to be blue, there are supposed to be gnomes in the yard next door," she says around the yard.

"How do you…" Rory's jaw drops in disbelief. "You remember TheCrapShack?"

**Oh Cliffy! :) TBC.....**


	9. Problems

**Hey, so….it's been awhile, huh? A month and a day. Sorry. So my finals went well but unfortunately that didn't get me out of stupid summer school so I am still in school mode for another week and a half but after that I'm free! (thank God) lol. So here is chapter 9 and I really hope you like it! Let me know what you think. -PMB**

Problems

"How do you…?" Rory's jaw drops in disbelief. "You remember The Crap Shack?"

Lorelai just looks at her. Of course she doesn't remember anything. How could she, when the people who are supposed to be closest to her are sheltering her from her own life? She folds her arms across her chest defiantly and turns away from her daughter. Rory looks on, confused. She is about to start asking questions but the rumbling of a dark green pickup truck diverts her attention. She looks out the passenger side window and sees Luke and April pull up and step out of the truck. Lorelai doesn't move nor does she change her demeanor so Rory unbuckles her seatbelt and gets out of the car.

"Hey," Luke greets her as April says, "Hey Rory."

"Hey you guys," Rory says as she smiles back.

"You just get here?" Luke asks.

Rory nods. "Um…yeah." She looks back at her car and sees her mother still staring straight ahead. "I think Mom's startling to remember something," she tells them.

"What?" Luke asks blankly.

"She was…. I don't know, it was really weird. She asked me why we were here and she kept saying this isn't her house."

"You really think she remembers?" he inquires.

"I don't know," Rory continues. "She went quiet after I asked her and then you two pulled up."

"Why is she still in the car?" April asks after she notices that Lorelai still hasn't moved.

"I'm not sure, I'll go get her," Rory says before turning away from them. She walks back over to her and around to the driver's side. Lorelai is staring down at the black book that she'd seen earlier in the hospital. She pulls on the door handle but it doesn't budge.

Shocked, she pulls on several times in a row. "Lorelai! Unlock the door."

Lorelai glances up and rolls her eyes at the younger girl before going back to her reading.

Luke approaches. "What's going on?" he asks.

"She locked me out," Rory tells him flabbergasted.

"What?"

"She won't let me in," she repeats.

Luke approaches the car and tries to open the passenger side door but it turns out to be just as useful as Rory's attempt. "Where are your keys?" he inquires.

"In the ignition. The car is still running, Luke," she says exasperatedly, surprised that he doesn't notice the engine running.

"Right." He bangs his hand on the window but Lorelai doesn't pay him any attention. Instead, almost as if cued she turns the dial on the radio raising the volume. The Go-Go's "We got the Beat" blares from the stereo causing Lorelai to truly smile as she sings along.

Luke sighs and shakes his head. "April, why don't you go on inside and do your homework, and tell Mrs. Gilmore that Lorelai and Rory are here."

April looks at the crazy woman in the car, and then back at her father. "Oh-kay," she says exaggerating the word and makes her way up the driveway and into the house.

Luke then turns his attention back to the car and looks up at Rory. "What happened?"

"What do you mean what happened?" Rory asks incredulously. "I got of the car to talk to you, came back and she locked the door."

At that moment the door to the house opens and Emily steps out.

As Luke and Rory try their best to explain the situation Lorelai watches from the car. She can't hear what they are saying over the high volume of the radio but she's almost positive it's about her.

She's angry with them. She knows that she read in this book somewhere that they painted the house blue, she and Luke together, and this house is far from blue. This isn't her home. She looks down at the pages spread before her and flips around randomly, finally falling on a page written in pink ink.

_June 3rd_

_With the exception of my frequent trips to the bathroom I haven't gotten out of bed today. I felt weak and pitiful and I just couldn't do anything. I called Michel this morning and told him that I'm sick. Which isn't a total lie because I've been vomiting Linda Blair style all day, but I guess I could have still gone to work. Truthfully I don't want to be around people. Rory decided to spend the night with Paris in New Haven so I get to be alone anyway._

_It's really sad actually. All I've been able to do is throw up, cry, and dream of the beautiful wedding I planned. The perfect dress is still hanging in my closet. I've contemplated burning it but that would require effort and I'm too tired. It seems that all I have left is the memory of what was meant to be and the mess that it turned into._

_I wonder if he even remembers._

_I wonder if he is sitting in his hermit hole, feeling like his whole the world has collapsed from underneath him._

_Probably not._

_So yesterday, I visited my friend Mr. Doctor. And he said "Congratulations Ms. Gilmore. You're gonna have a baby". Congratulations, like this is a goal I've been working toward instead of an unfortunate accident. I don't know why I was surprised though. 12 pregnancy tests told me the exact same thing 2 days ago._

_I wrote him a letter this morning. Actually I wrote him 3 but ended up throwing out the first two. I told him about the baby and how angry I am that I have to do it alone and that we aren't getting married to day. It was probably worse than the first two because I ended up crying all over it but it doesn't really matter. I'd never send it anyway. I hid it in the DVD case to 'The Way We Were'._

_I'm so….despondent_

_And I feel guilty about not being pleased. I should be happy. I should want to do a dance and announce to the world that I am going to be a Mom again but…I can't bring myself to get excited. I was lying on that cold bed in the doctor's office thinking things that I am ashamed to admit. I can't even write them down. I don't want to remember. Luke would never speak to me again if he knew that for even a fraction of a second I thought about- Never mind. I hate myself enough for the both of us. So let's just not think about that and go back to my wallowing._

_I've been up here for hours. I should eat something but I'm just too down. I just want to sleep, so that's exactly what I am going to do. Sleep the rest of June third away._

_Goodnight._

_Lorelai_

This entry surprises her. It's so different from the ones she's been reading. She isn't used to this person who is sad and unhappy. It isn't like her. For a moment she wonders if the entry was even written by the same person. Depressing.

She looks up and sees the three adults in the driveway arguing over what to do. She picks up another taco and unwraps it, deciding to let them wait it out a few minutes longer before giving in and getting out of the car. She is getting uncomfortable in here anyway.

Suddenly Luke catches her gaze and she stops chewing. He looks back at the two women in front of him and tells them he's going to try and talk to her and then he walks over to the passenger's side of the car and taps on her window.

She looks at him, swallows the food in her mouth and then puts the rest of her taco down.

He smiles shortly, happy to have achieved her attention as she rolls the window down enough for him to talk to her.

"What?"

"Why won't you get out of the car?" he asks calmly.

Lorelai sighs, "Because I don't want to."

"Fair enough," he replies. "Can I get in with you?"

She shrugs and rolls up the window. He takes the hint and walks around to the driver's side of the door and waits patiently for the sound of the door unlocking. Slowly Lorelai's arms travels up the door to the lock button. She closes her eyes and pushes it hard giving him access to the car and everyone inside it.

He sends a look to Emily and Rory as he opens the door and then slides in. Chuckling a little as she picks her taco up and takes another bite he closes the door and turns toward her.

"What are you doing Lorelai?"

"I am partaking in a mindless ritual most know as eating," she retorts.

He shakes his head. "Wouldn't you rather eat inside?"

"Not particularly."

"Why not?"

"Because this isn't my house."

"What makes you say that?"

"I'm not stupid Luke, I can read, you didn't think I'd describe my home in my diary. I mean there are pages written on paint samples alone."

"Ah."

"I don't know why you guys felt you needed to lie," she says.

"We just didn't want to confuse you. The old house wasn't big enough for all of us, so we had to upgrade slightly."

Lorelai rolls her eyes at him as she finishes her taco. "Whatever."

"Please don't be upset, all your stuff is still inside. Just in a slightly larger area." She is unresponsive so he continues. "Can I at least show you around inside before you decide you absolutely won't stay here?"

She shrugs and looks at him, "I guess." She sighs as she unbuckles her seat belt and throws her journal back into the box in the back seat.

Luke jumps out of the car and walks around to her side to open her door and help her out. She steps out of the vehicle and gives Luke her hands so that he can pull her up. Emily and Rory exchange glances and start toward Luke and Lorelai.

"What was that about?" Rory asks her mother.

Luke answers, "Lorelai feels like we weren't exactly up front with her about things that directly involve her."

"What are you my public spokes person now?" she asks him as she snatches her arm away from his protective grasp. "I can walk by myself." With a huff, she walks painfully past them up the driveway and on to the porch, determined not to let her still healing injuries slow her down.

Without glancing back at her stunned family in the driveway she pushes open the front door and steps inside determined to figure things out on her own.

The entry way is nice enough. Immediately when walking inside there is a large wooden staircase that leads to the second floor and past the stairs is a hall that goes into the living room. The floors are hard wood and the walls are a soft yellow. Silently thankful that it is nowhere near as stuffy or boring as her parent's house she smiles and steps in further.

"How did you get her out of the car?" Lorelai hears coming from the other room, she follows the voice and walks into the living room where a young girl is on the floor with at least three textbooks spread out In front of her.

April hears someone enter the room and turns around but is surprised to see her almost step mother standing there. "Oh!" she says nervously and then stands up. "I didn't realize it was you."

"Hi," Lorelai says trying not to be rude to the young girl. "Do I know you?"

"Um kinda," she admits shyly. "I'm April, Luke's daughter."

"Oh!" Lorelai smiles, having read something about April in her book. "Nice to see you again."

"Yeah you too," April replies as the two hear the front door open.

"I'm just going to look around," she says turning away.

Aprils face lights up, "I can show you around," she says hopefully as Rory, Luke, and Emily enter the living room.

Lorelai smiles, "I'd like that."

She nods and kneels down on the floor to close up her books.

"What's going on?" Luke asks.

"I'm going to take Lorelai on a tour," April tells him happily.

"Yeah, we'll be back," Lorelai adds.

"Okay," April says with her best tour guide impersonation. "This is the living room. It's mostly for T.V. watching and stuff but I like to do my homework in here because it's spacious and the windows let in a lot of light and stuff."

"Yeah."

"So yeah, T.V., couch, stuff like that, oh and in there," she says pointing to a cupboard under the T.V. stand. "You have a seriously impressive movie collection, I mean you go the classics ranging from the Godfather to Harry Potter."

"Harry Who?" Lorelai asks confused.

"Never mind, we'll get back to that later. Follow me." She exits the living room and goes into the hall that leads into the kitchen. "This is the kitchen. Dad says you can't cook but you probably still want to know where it is in case you want a snack or something. It's just a kitchen with all your basic kitchen stuff oven, fridge, stuff like that."

Lorelai smiles, "Looks good."

"Okay, Moving on, this is the hallway. Who hasn't seen one of those?" April laughs moving to the staircase but Lorelai lingers looking at the picture on the wall. Her and Rory in the hospital on the day she was born, her and Rory on Rory's Second Birthday, her and Rory on Rory's first day of school. She watches herself and her daughter grow up in these pictures.

"You always made sure to get everything on film," Rory says coming up behind her. "You said you didn't want to forget."

"I didn't mean too," she replies stiffly.

Rory puts her hand on her mother's shoulder. "I know you didn't."

She turns around and smiles, "Where did April go?"

"I'm right here," the teenage replies coming back down the stairs, "I turned around and you were gone."

"Sorry, I got distracted. I'm right behind you."

"Okay, Next I'll show you my room, which is totally cool because no offense to my Dad but the apartment he had before was way drab if you know what I mean," she babbles as she walks up the stairs again, only with Lorelai and Rory trailing behind her this time. "And that whole no doors thing, wasn't really working for me."

"You didn't have doors?" Lorelai asks.

"Nope, just big open archways."

"Wow!"

"I know!" April exclaims as Rory snickers behind them. "Okay this is it. Don't you just love the color cerulean, I am very into cerulean."

"I can tell," Lorelai replies sarcastically, "It looks like a smurf blew up in here." She laughs.

"I know but I love it…. Hey! Wanna see Dad's room? It's nowhere near as cool." The teen asks but before Lorelai can answer she is prancing across the hall and opening the door.

Lorelai steps inside and looks around at the plain white walls blue bed spread. "Where on earth did he find flannel sheets?"

"Beats me." April shrugs.

"Where is your room?" Lorelai asks turning to Rory.

"Down the hall."

"Can I see?"

Rory smiles, "Of course."

"Her room is fabulous, despite its aura," April adds as she follows behind Rory and Lorelai.

"It's not as together as April's or Luke's is, I'm still unpacking," the younger Gilmore admits as she opens the door to her lilac colored room.

"I like this, it seems like you," her mother says. "It's very Zen."

Rory puts her hands on her hips and looks around. "You think so?"

"Yeah," Lorelai nods.

"Thanks."

"No problem, so ladies, where do I sleep?"

"You have the biggest room," April says playing it up. "It got its own bathroom and a balcony, and it's right next to the nursery which Dad and Mrs. Gilmore thought was convenient."

"Wait." Lorelai stops her. "What nursery?"

"Oh well it isn't a room yet but it's going to be." April rambles.

"Yeah, we haven't gotten anything for yet," Rory jumps in not wanting to upset the older woman any more. "I was thinking you could go shopping with Sookie or Luke and pick out what you like, I mean it is your baby."

"Yes, it is," Lorelai says firmly but then softens as she looks into the open room. There are two windows in the back and the sun is shining through them making the room look magical. She can see baby blue paint on the walls and a crib in the corner. She leans her head against the frame of the door forgetting that she isn't alone and smiles. "What's a Sookie?" she asks suddenly.

"Not a what, a who," Rory explains.

"What?"

"No, who?"

"Wait, what? I'm confused."

"Sookie is a person," April clarifies.

"Oh." Lorelai shrugs it off and turns away to take the five steps to her bedroom. "Double doors, this is looking up already." She pushes them open and walks into to her master bedroom suite. The walls are a soft blue, not quite the blue she was imagining for the baby's room but not as in your face as the blue of April's room. The comforter on the bed is white and it makes her think of a cloud, or a hotel, and on the mantle is a hello Kitty alarm clock that makes her laugh.

"Lorelai!" she hears the shrillness of her mother's voice and snaps out of her dream like state. Lorelai can hear her heels on the stairs and knows that she is coming. Emily enters the bedroom.

"There you are," she starts. "You've been on your feet long enough; I think it's time you sit down."

"I don't recall asking what you think," Lorelai replies snidely.

"Please don't do this," Emily say putting her hands to her temples.

"I know what I need," Lorelai states folding her arms across her chest, "and what I don't need, is my _Mommy_ telling me what to do."

"We have all had enough of your childish behavior for one day."

"My _childish_ behavior? At least I've been honest, I'm not the one who has been lying and hiding things, so don't tell me I'm acting childish and quit being such a damn hypocrite," Lorelai bites out, rolling her eyes in disdain.

Emily throws her hands up, "I don't know what we are going to do with you!" she says.

"Oh my God! I'm not five. You can't ground me… in fact you can't tell me what to do at all," Lorelai retorts raising her voice.

Luke, having heard the commotion comes up stairs. "What's going on up here?"

"The Williams sisters ladies and gentleman," Rory says in announcer voice.

Emily drops her hands to her sides. "I was just trying to remind my hard-headed daughter that she just got out of the hospital, she's recovering from a major head injury, and she is almost six months pregnant."

"Thanks for the update," Lorelai deadpans.

"I just think she should sit down is relax, why is that so wrong?"

"Lorelai," Luke sighs. "Your mother is right, you should be taking it easy?"

"You're siding with her?" she points accusingly. "I don't believe this. All I am doing is standing here, I'm not dancing, or jumping up and down. Jeez."

"Lorelai-" Rory starts.

"No! You know what, whatever! Just leave me alone!"

"We aren't going anywhere," Luke protests.

"Fine!" she shouts and tries to walk past them.

"Where are you going?" Emily asks.

"None of your fucking business!" she says angrily.

"You can't leave," her mother replies.

"Either I am or you are… take your pick!" she adds through gritted teeth.

"Alright," Luke says calmly. "We'll step out. Why don't you just try and calm down."

"Bite me," Lorelai snaps at him. "I am not about to do what you, or her, or anyone else in this entire freakin' house tells me to if I don't feel like it. Got that, bucko?"

Luke looks at her worriedly. It's hard to imagine that this is the same woman he's been in love with for so long, the same woman he almost married. "I… I… sorry," it comes out in a timid whisper as he averts his eyes to stare at his shoes, afraid of the anger in her blue eyes.

"We're leaving but we're not going to forget this issue," Emily tells her daughter sternly. "You owe us all an apology."

Lorelai lifts her hand to flip her mother off, but Emily stops it by holding up her own hand, with her palm facing Lorelai. "Don't."

Lorelai puts her hand down and sits down on the bed, exhausted. "Whatever."

She closes her eyes for a minute, trying to regain some semblance of composure, and when she reopens her eyes they are gone. She is alone, finally.

**REVIEW!**


	10. Stories

**Hi, So the reviews for the last chapter were so mixed on Lorelai's attitude. Some of you were like "Hey, Luke deserved it for the way he treated her on the whole April issue" and some of you were like, "I hate this Lorelai..." So when writing this chapter I was extreamly conflicted and I actually had a comepletely different track in mind for it. Oh well, the best laid plans, right? **

**On to my thank yous...**

**visionxofxme and coffeebeanner thank you for letting me annoy you with my endless vague questioning on ideas and wordings. I appreciate you both. **

**and to the rest of you who read and review...thank you for being there. Oh yeah and I enabled anonymus reviewing. i didnt even realize it was off. **

**Oh yeah, one more thing...how would you guys feel about me adding Jess in perhaps over Logan?**

**I hope you guys find this chapter okay, let me know what you think. :)**

**-PMB**

Stories

When Lorelai wakes up the sun is just starting to go down. She can see the cast of pastel colors reflecting off the pond through her windows. As she sits up she realizes that she has been covered by a weird looking blanket, and has a Post-It Note stuck to her forehead, but she can barely make out what it says in the dark. She cuts on the light beside the bed and sitting right underneath the lamp on the nightstand are a pair a black-framed glasses. She picks them up and slides them on her face and is suddenly able to see much better than she has in a while. Remembering the note in her hand she looks down at her daughter's handwriting.

_Gone Back 2 Yale. See ya soon. –Rory._

Lorelai sighs. She hadn't meant to be so mean to everyone, everything was just so overwhelming. She absolutely hates being bossed around, and for a second it seemed like they were all going to start ganging up on her, so she snapped. It was like a volcano just erupted inside of her and she had to retaliate, had to defend herself.

Hoping that her mood swings aren't the reason Rory left, she smoothes the quilt covering her tracing the stitching with her hand. It's cute, decoratively made with different patterns of cloth. She fingers the fabric and suddenly it comes to her. She remembers making this quilt for herself out of Rory's baby clothes when she out grew them. She remembers staying up all night at the sewing machine in the potting shed to finish it and sticking her fingers more times then she can count. It isn't a big memory but it's something. She can sew. Lorelai smiles and stands up from the bed ready to tell anyone who will listen.

She walks over to the French doors and pulls them open stepping on to her balcony, still clutching her blanket, and sees him sitting out by the pond appearing lost in thought. She wonders if he is thinking about her. She doesn't mean to be vain or arrogant but she hopes he is because she can't help but think of him.

Luke, the man in the plaid flannel and backwards baseball cap, has been on her mind more than she'd like to admit. Being honest with herself, she finds it weird; not that she's thinking _of_ him, but because he's not her type. She's always gone for guys like Christopher. And Luke, she muses, is older than her, mentally and physically; he has to be at least over forty. Yet she cannot help that she's completely infatuated with him, and craves to be around him.

Swallowing her pride, she decides she'll apologize and maybe he'll let her sit with him. With her quilt still in her arms she turns away and closes the doors then drops the blanket on the bed and leaves the room following the stairs to the first floor and exiting the house through the back door. She closes it quietly behind her, careful not to disturb him, and begins her slow trod across the grass.

Luke sits wondering how he is going to make this work. How he is going to fix everything, and make Lorelai love him again? He questions himself as to if it's even possible and if it is would he be taking advantage of her in her impaired state? Staring out at the water, he hopes that the baby inside her isn't the last thing they'll ever share.

Lorelai clears her throat to gain his attention. He turns and looks up into the beautiful blue eyes that have him so conflicted.

"Hey," she says quietly, "Can I sit with you?"

"Yeah…sure," he manages confused by her approach.

She smiles and slowly lowers herself to the ground placing her free arm securely behind her to support her protruding stomach.

He watches her settle herself but can't stop himself from staring even once she is stable. After a second, she speaks giving him a reason to look at her. "I just wanted to say, that I'm sorry for snapping at you earlier, I was just really tired and I don't know what came over me, you were just trying to look out for me, I didn't mean to be such a bitch."

"You weren't…. It's okay, really," he assures her, but she shakes her head.

"No it's not. You didn't deserve that."

Luke shrugs, "It's really no big deal."

"Would you just let me apologize, please?" she prods gently.

"Alright," Luke concedes. "Apology accepted."

She smiles again. "Thank you, Luke."

"You're welcome," he says returning gesture.

They sit in silence for a few minutes before Lorelai glances over at him, "Hey, Luke?" she says.

"Yeah?"

"Do you remember back at the hospital when I told you I wasn't ready to know about _us_?"

"Yeah."

"I think I'm ready now."

He looks over at her and smiles. "What do you want to know?"

She shrugs, "Why don't you just start from the beginning. We don't have to go through everything tonight, maybe just…I don't know, tell me about how we met."

Nostalgia takes over him as he revels in the memory. He laughs a little.

"What?" she wonders.

"Nothing… it's just… this is your favorite story."

Her face brightens visibly, "Really?"

"That's what you said. You used to make me tell it to you all the time."

"Tell me, tell me!" she begs happily.

A smile of complete adoration spreads across Luke's face, he begins eagerly. "It was at my diner during the lunch rush. You came flying through the place in a caffeine induced frenzy, and you were talking a mile a minute. Who knows what you were saying," he pauses and reflects, his eyes sparkling with reminiscence; she giggles and urges him to continue. "So, I turn and tell you you're being annoying, to sit down and shut up that I'll get to you when I get to you."

She smiles charmingly, a look of smugness in her eyes. "You know, I bet I took that just wonderfully!"

"You didn't," Luke answers, laughter in the way he says it. "You began following me around, flapping a newspaper at me." He stops when he sees her confusion at having waved a newspaper at him, so he quickly clarifies. "You wanted to know what my birthday was, and it wasn't until after about the third time you asked that I caved. I told you what my birthday was. You flipped the newspaper open to the horoscope section, next to Scorpio you wrote: You will meet an annoying woman today, give her coffee and she'll go away."

She stares at him wild-eyed, in wonderment. "Did you give me coffee?"

"I gave you coffee." He nods in conformation.

"But I didn't go away?" She looks at him questioningly.

"You didn't go away." He looks at her and smiles. "But I'm glad you didn't."

"You are? Really?" She places her hand on her chest, on the left side about where her heart is, and smiles at him lovingly. It's like she's falling in love with him all over again.

He leans into her and kisses her cheek, feeling an electric spark return but doesn't want to scare her.

"What happened to the horoscope?" she asks quietly, blushing from his innocent gesture.

"You told me to hang on to it, that it would bring me luck. And it has, it brought me you."

Lorelai reddens through her unshakeable grin and lays her palm over his but their mini moment is disrupted by a twitch in her abdomen that makes her gasp out loud. Luke's expression turns to worry as she grimaces.

"Is everything okay?" he asks quickly.

"Yeah…" she mutters in response rubbing her hand over her abdomen. "His kicks, they're just…getting really strong. It just surprised me that's all," she says giving him a reassuring smile.

"Are you sure?" he asks not completely convinced.

"Yes." Her smile grows in confidence as she makes a grab for his hand and places it on the side of her stomach where their son is still kicking. "See," she giggles. "It's nothing, really."

Luke's eyes grow wide at the thumping underneath his hand grows in strength. "Does it hurt?" he asks without moving his hand.

She shrugs. "Sometimes, it just depends on where he does it and how hard," she tells him and then looks down at her stomach. "Alright, you have my attention, you can stop now." She looks back up to Luke shyly. "I think we're hungry."

Luke smiles and nods, "Figures," he says standing up. Once he's vertical he extends his arm and pulls her up. "Let's get you fed."

"And coffee?" she asks hopefully.

"Lorelai…."

"They wouldn't give it to me at the hospital," she pouts.

"Maybe tomorrow," he tells her, obliviously still holding her hand.

As they walk back into the house he turns to her. "What would you like for dinner?"

She ponders this for a moment and then looks up with excitement, "Waffles."

"Waffles?" he asks.

She nods. "Yes with barbeque sauce."

The look on his face gives the impression of something that mirrors disgusted. "Um…"

"You don't have to eat it," she reminds him with a smile.

"Thank god."

Lorelai sits down at the dining room table and watches Luke make her waffles in utter amazement. He keeps her in conversation, distracting her from the painful blows she is now receiving to her rib. She rubs her un-weighted hand across her stomach attempting to calm the child inside her while laughing at Luke's stories of the colorful characters of Stars Hollow.

He is just finishing the one about Kirk vs. Cat Kirk when he sets a plate of waffles and a bottle of BBQ sauce in front of her and goes to call his daughter down for dinner.

Once April and Luke get over the initial disgustingness of Lorelai's dinner they fall into a pretty easy rhythm of dinner time conversation, mostly discussing April's day at school and their plans for the rest of the week.

Lorelai likes spending time with Luke and April, it's almost like for a little while they are her family and she belongs with them.

After dinner Luke cleans up and April heads off to bed with the excuse of having to leave for school early to get to the library before the place becomes crowded.

Lorelai too heads upstairs. Full, she changes into a large t-shirt and brushes her teeth for bed. As she drops her toothbrush in the cup she does something daring. She looks up and stares at her reflection in the mirror.

She'd told Rory she was afraid of what thirty-eight looked like but now that she was looking twenty years in the eye, she determines that her fears had been misplaced. She studies her face. The familiar blue eyes she has seen in her daughter, her memorable curly raven hair, and the features that made her look like a grown woman that she would have to become acquainted with. However, all in all, not much has changed. She smiles at herself thinking that she grew up well and is surprisingly pleased with the end result. Yawning, she steals one last glance before hitting the light and leaving the bathroom and settling on her nice, big, pretty bed.

Blissful, Lorelai closes her eyes and falls deep into unconsciousness.

_Everything is dark around her. Stormy clouds are blocking out the moon. Even with the street lamps she can hardly see the road. At first she is alone on the highway, riding smoothly and peacefully with Eternal Flame playing on the radio but slowly other vehicles begin to join hers and soon an abundance of cars are flying past her. She is behind the wheel, driving, but suddenly she can't steer, it's like the wheel has become frozen and she is unable to fix it or stop the train wreck that is about to occur. Gentle rain begins taping on her windshield making her vision blurry. It gets harder with each passing second, making her nervous. Thunder sounds in the distance immediately followed by a bright flash of lightning and the car speeds up taking her with it. She slams her foot on brake as hard as she can but the car won't stop it just picks up speed pushing the speedometer further to the right. She starts to scream with a dark realization of what's about to happen but no one comes to her rescue._

_All she can do is watch as the cars in front of her lose control. An 18 wheeler skids up on its side and bursts into furious flames. A small van slams into it exploding on impact and she knows she is next. She screams louder, much more frantically, and fights to break the window or open the door but it won't budge, she's trapped. She can feel the tears streaming down her face as she begs for an escape._

In another room, Luke is drifting off, enjoying the sound of the rain on the window, and thinking about his day and the way it did a complete 180. He thought nothing would be able to turn his mood around after he'd left Lorelai's room but she surprised him. Settled under the blanket ready to be taken by the sleep gods, he is suddenly jolted awake by a high pitched scream coming from Lorelai's room. He jumps out of his skin completely startled then without thinking jumps out of bed and walks quickly into the hallway just as April emerges from her bedroom.

"What's going on?" she asks tiredly following her father down the hall.

Luke doesn't bother knocking on the door he opens the double door without hesitation and proceeds in her bedroom. Instantly, he is greeted with the sight of her pale sweating body thrashing around on the bed and continues to hear her screaming in agony. April waits by the door a little afraid herself, unsure of what's happening.

"Lorelai," He says as reaches her bedside and realizes she is asleep. "Lorelai, sweetie, wake up!" Tears are streaming down her face and it scares him. He grasps her shoulders and shakes her, in a desperate attempt to wake her up. "Lorelai, honey, please wake up!"

Abruptly, her eyes shoot open and he is greeted with a terrified watery blue that reminds of the night she begged him to elope.

As soon as sees him she whimpers and leaps into his arms gasping for air. She clings to him, burying her face into the crook of his neck like a small child while he holds on to her trembling body for dear life.

April steps further into the room to observe watch the scene a little more closely. "Is she okay?" she asks her father in a hushed tone.

He nods. "I think she will be, go on back to sleep, Sweetie."

"Okay," April agrees quickly. "Night," she mutters as she leaves her father to handle the situation at hand.

Luke watches her leave and then turns his attention back to the sobbing woman in his arms. "Shhh…" he soothes, running his hands through her hair. "It's okay. Everything is alright," he tells her but she doesn't loosen her grip nor does she show any signs calming down so he lets her cry it out while rubbing small circles against her back.

After a few minutes her breathing evens out and all that is left of her sobs are the silent tears falling down her cheeks. Her grip on him relaxes and slowly she starts to pull away from him exposing her red, puffy, tear stained face.

"What is it, baby?" he asks genuinely concerned.

She sniffles trying to wrap her mind around the images and sounds from her dream. The reverberation of her own screams echo through her mind. She looks at him as water wells up in her eyes again. "Don't…go…" she begs laying her head on his chest.

"I'm right here," Luke tells her, holding her close.

"No, please... sleep in here…with me?" Her voice is quiet, afraid of his response.

"Of course, Lorelai."

She needs a distraction. She needs to push the frightening thoughts away from her mind. She buries her face into his shirt and inhales his sweet aroma. Something changes for her in that moment. Here is this man, a man she has strong feelings for, a man who tells her often that he loves her, a man who wants to comfort her and make her feel better. She wants to love him too. She wants all of him. She wants to feel him, taste him, touch him, and she wants him to want her back.

She pulls away and sits up, shifting her weight onto her knees so that she can straddle his legs. She presses her body hard against his and looks at him. She can see uncertainty spilling from his eyes. He thinks he should tell her to stop, but he doesn't really want her to, even though he knows it's not right; he opens his mouth to say something but his mind can't form the words, he's left with his mouth hanging open. She knows it's not the time for this but the urgency she feels in this moment outweighs all logical thinking.

She smiles shyly and takes a deep breath before placing her mouth on his neck. Before her lips even come in contact with his skin she can feel the heat radiating off him and it makes her crave him more. She places a soft kiss to his jaw and then another one on the corner of his mouth. He reciprocates by kissing her mouth as his hands slowly travel up her shirt and caress the skin of her back. She responds with a deep moan, aching for him, and he presses her closer to him, kissing her more passionately on the mouth.

Her tongue slides in his mouth and she bathes in the sensual feeling of the kiss; warm and wet, tasting like mint toothpaste. She closes her eyes and basks in the feel of his nimble hands caressing every bit of her skin, and her hands move under his shirt while she pulls away to quickly pull it over his head. Once it's off, she tosses it to the side; it lands haphazardly on the floor of her bedroom. He craves to be inside her, to be one with her again, but no matter how much he wants it, he simply can't bring himself to take control and do it. He never fathomed being this close to her again, but now that he is, it's just not right. After her accident, and that before, he knows she's not really ready, so reluctantly he pulls away from her, but brushes her hair back from her face with an expert hand.

"Lorelai," he gasps trying to catch his breath from her searing kiss as he looks at her. Her chest is heaving and her lips are red and swollen.

"What?" she asks, breathlessly. "Why'd you stop?"

"We can't…." he starts, trying to choose his words extremely carefully. "…do this."

She looks at him with sad eyes but doesn't know what to say. She thought he wanted her. He'd acted like he had. He'd looked at her like he did. She is so confused. "But….why?" she asks taking herself off his lap.

"We just can't," he says simply.

She stares down at her lap as silence washes over the room. "Is it…me?" she asks quietly, suddenly feeling extremely self conscious she covers her stomach with her arm. "I mean…I thought…." Her face turns bright red and she can't bring herself to look at him. "Sorry."

"No, it's not you. You're beautiful. It's just that... uh, well," he pauses and scratches his head. "I don't want to rush you. You weren't exactly speaking to me before your accident."

"I know but, that doesn't have anything to do with right now?"

"See the thing is, I'm not sure this is what you want, I think you're just scared," he says gently.

Lorelai rolls her eyes. "If I didn't want you I wouldn't have…never mind... whatever," she says turning away from him so he can't see her pout.

Remembering her earlier request he reaches out to her. "Do you still want me to stay?" he asks.

With wounded pride she snaps at him, "Do whatever you want!"

He doesn't really want to leave but he doesn't want to deal with her mood swings either so slowly he rises from her bed to leave, however, he doesn't see the panic that crosses her face right before she makes a grab for his arm. "Luke wait!" she pleads grasping his hand. "Please? Please stay."

Luke looks back at her and nods. "Come on," he says as he helps her back into bed. He cuts off the light and walks around to the other side of the bed where he crawls in beside her.

"Goodnight Crazy Lady," he mumbles as he begins to drift off to sleep.

She leans into him as he wraps his arm around her and her head snaps up, "What did you call me?"

**Review please. **


	11. Dreams

**Summer was crazy and now I am back to school but here is a new chapter for you and I am outlining the next one for you as we speak. What's new with me? Hm. Had surgery….got my driver's license….started school….got a job….I've just been crazy busy I hope you aren't upset and can just bare with me. **

**By the way the reviews for the last chapter were just amazing. You guys are so awesome. I hope you continue to enjoy the story. The next chapter I think is going to be my favorite. The way this outline is looking it's going to be super long. So be on the lookout very soon. **

Dreams

Luke wakes up early the next morning to see April off to school. He doesn't have to go into work because he had Caesar open and run the diner for the day so that he can help Lorelai adjust a little more. He tries to get up but Lorelai is clinging to him in her sleep so he detaches her, careful not to wake her, and rolls her off him, before he climbs out of her bed.

He walks across the room to the door and stops, turns around to look at her sleeping figure, still lying like she is facing him. The sight of her dark curls toppling over the pillow makes him smile. He watches her sleep for a few seconds longer and then leaves the room to go wake up his daughter.

"April!" he calls tapping lightly on the door, "Time to get up."

He hears some shuffling behind the door and then it opens, revealing a tired looking teenager. "Hi," she whispers.

"I'm going to make your lunch, PB&J okay?"The girl nods wiping the sleep away from her eyes. "Oatmeal for breakfast?"

Again she nods.

"Okay then, I'll meet you downstairs."

Luke walks down the stairs with a smile having slept a full comfortable night for the first time in months, since he watched the love of his life walk away from him, disappearing into the night. As he walks into the kitchen he contemplates how much he missed something as simple as sharing a bed with her. Never mind everything else that happened last night. He takes the bread and peanut butter from the cabinet and the jelly from the fridge as he commemorates the feel of her body in his arms, venerates the taste of her tongue in his mouth, and revives the smells of her hair in his face. By the time he's finished making his daughters sandwich he already misses her. April comes down stairs a few minutes later completely dressed and takes a seat at the table. He sets her oatmeal in front of her.

"Ready for school?" he asks.

"Yeah," she smiles, "Hey Dad?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you think I could maybe spend the night with Marcia?" she asks.

"Tomorrow night?"

"Yeah, there is a movie coming on tomorrow we don't want to miss."

Luke shrugs, "Alright."

April grins. "Thanks Dad," she says as she scoops a spoon full of oatmeal into her mouth. Luke sits down and has breakfast with his daughter and then they leave together so that he can take her to school and then check and make sure that Caesar can handle the diner without him for the day.

As Lorelai opens her eyes, it takes a moment for her eyes to really focus, but when they do she finds that she is alone in her bed. She can't help but wonder if the night before was a dream or if it really happened; however, the horrible nightmare, she knows for sure she really had, and she'd much rather chew nails than relive it. But the man who held her in his strong arms afterward, whispering to her that he was there and that everything would be all right, is what her mind is fuzzy on. Did it really happen? The kiss felt so real, it made her want him to take her right then, right there, no doubts or questions asked. Except she's alone now, and she wants to cry thinking it was all a dream.

Sadly, she stands up only to be hit by an overwhelming wave of dizziness. After she falls back onto the bed and closes her eyes she takes a few deep breaths and thinks to herself that she is really getting tired of this pregnancy thing. Opening her eyes, she tries again, successfully making it into a vertical position this time.

She carefully walks across the room to her dresser and opens the top drawer. Something catches her eye. She stops rifling through her underwear drawer and looks down, what she sees takes her by surprise. She reaches her hand down and pulls out the most striking diamond ring she has ever seen.

Staring down at the sparkling jewel in her hand, she gasps….

She can hear his voice echoing off the walls of the house as he declared, "Moment's here!"

_She walked out of Rory's bedroom wiping the tears from her eyes and smiled when she saw him. "Moment?" she asked joining him in the living room._

_He smiled and took her hand leading her outside into the yard illuminated by the full moon he'd been waiting for. He led her under the Chuppah that he carved and got down on one knee._

"_I love you, Lorelai Gilmore," he said. She covered her mouth with her right hand as he held on to her left one and pulled out the ring. "And I'm going to marry you." He grinned looking up into her drowning blue eyes as he slid the band on her finger. She smiled at the man in front of her, reveling in the fact that this is real, and no one could take this moment away from her._

She shutters in reminiscence and realizes that she now has the ring securely on her wedding finger. She must have absent-mindedly slid it on. She looks down at it and takes note of how good it looks resting there. She smiles shining through the fact that she has recovered another memory, and goes to take the ring off and put it back in the drawer, however, her smile fades as pulls on the ring on her finger but it doesn't budge. "Oh my god," she says panicking.

As she realizes that the band is stuck for the time being, she takes a deep breath and calms herself. "What's the harm in wearing it, just for a little while," she asks herself and grabs some underwear, a shirt and some stretchable pajama shorts and heads into the bathroom to wash her face and brush her teeth.

She takes her time changing her clothes, since she can't move very fast anyway, and then pulls her long curly hair up into a ponytail.

With a quick glance at herself in the mirror she cuts off the light and opens the door but the sight in front of her causes her to stop dead in her tracks.

On her plushy white bed, a shaggy grey and white dog sits panting comfortably. For a split second she wonders if she is still dreaming and forgets all about the ring immobilized on her finger.

The dog sees her, stands up and barks in recognition.

"Um…hi…" she says timidly wondering how the hell a dog got into her house. The wheels in her head start turning and a large smile spreads over her face. "Paul Anka," she whispers.

Paul Anka barks again in confirmation.

She takes a step towards him and begins to think to herself. It strikes her as odd that she sees this dog for the first time and instantly his name pops into her head but when she looks at her daughter, a person that she physically created and brought into the world, she draws blanks. She thinks back to the journal and tries to remember if she read about him in there, and if that's why his name is so fresh on her mind. "Yeah, that's probably it," she tells herself as she takes a seat beside him.

Lorelai is sitting upstairs flipping through the channels on the television when she hears the door close down stairs. She has been up for over an hour now and assumes that it's him walking down stairs.

"Luuuukkkee…." Lorelai whines loudly from her bedroom upstairs. Truthfully she is painfully bored and hates being left alone for long periods of time. She likes to be with people experiencing things, enjoying life, plus she is hungry is she is almost positive that if she were to go down stairs on a food hunt she might just burn the house down.

When Luke arrives he finds her sitting on her bed with Paul Anka's head resting in her lap.

"I got a dog!" she beams when walks in the room. "Isn't he cute?"

"Damn animal has been hiding for days," Luke grumbles. "And what is he doing in the bed?"

Lorelai shrugs, "He likes it up here."

"You shouldn't let the dog in the bed."

"But he's sooo cute." Lorelai smiles threading her fingers gently through Paul Anka's fur.

Luke rolls his eyes but turns away so she can't see him smile at her interaction with the crazy mutt.

"Where'd you go?" He hears her ask him a second later.

"I took April to school, and made sure Caesar was still cool handling the diner for the day."

Her smile brightened visibly, "You're taking the whole day off?"

"Yes."

"To spend with me?" she questions excitedly.

"Yes." He chuckles. "Are you hungry?"

"God yes!" she answers quickly reaching out her hand so that he can pull her to her feet.

They walk down stairs together and she takes a seat at the table much like she did the night before while he makes her breakfast.

"What can I get you?" he asks.

"Ham and Cheese Omelet." She smiles. "Please."

He nods. "You got it."

Luke begins to gather the ingredients from the refrigerator while Lorelai starts to fidget with the ring on her finger.

"I want to ask you something…." She starts a minute later.

"What's that?"

"Last night, you called me Crazy Lady, but it didn't sound mean…why?"

Luke looks over at her and shrugs, "Old habit I guess."

"You make it a habit of calling me crazy?"

Luke can't help but laugh, " I guess I do…you just…always say the most indirect things. The things you do are always…passionate..." He smirks to himself going back to making breakfast, "There are times you act completely certifiable."

Lorelai looks confused. "Then why are you smiling?"

He grins at her. "It's a good thing. You're not like anyone else in the entire world."

She smiles at what he says still absentmindedly trying to get the ring off. "Hey Luke…" she starts again only this time more timidly. "I need help."

Luke looks up from what he is doing and finds her staring at him. "What is it?"

Lorelai stands up using the chair she was sitting in as leverage and walks into the kitchen. She holds up her left hand. "I found this in my top drawer and I was just looking at it but it got stuck because my hands are swollen, anyway I can't get it off."

Luke stares down at ring on her finger, the engagement ring she never returned, and for a split second he imagines that it belongs there. Lorelai watches him with avid interest as he picks up her left hand and brings it closer to his face to be examined.

"Can you get it off?" she asks breaking the lingering silence.

He looks up from her hand into her blue eyes and nods.

Rory walks through the hallway with her arms full of books on her way to Logan's apartment. She has a lot on her mind. The paper she has to write, the sociology book she is in the middle of, her mother, how she is going to make it to Friday Night Dinner on time and still go to the library again before the week's end. She wonders if she can skip a class, go home and read there thus solving the book and checking on her mother problem, write the paper on Friday before dinner and just wait until Saturday to do the research for the next one. Just as she is trying to explain to herself why that plan won't work her cell phone rings. She looks at the caller ID and smiles.

"Hey."

"Hey," Logan says from the other end of the line. "You watchin' it?" he asks.

"What?" she inquires shifting the weight of her books so that she doesn't drop everything, all while digging for her key and holding the phone to her ear.

"The meteor shower!" he states incredulously.

"What meteor shower?" she asks wondering if this was an event she was supposed to remember.

"It's on the news," Logan tells her. "The BBC said there's some huge meteor shower tonight and I thought we could watch it together."

"Uh, Logan, I have been in the library for the past nine hours," she explains. "I don't know anything about any meteor shower tonight. But I could really use a regular shower though," she admits dreaming of the relaxation that is mere feet away from her.

"Go up on the roof and check it out!" her boyfriend urges.

"Now?" she sighs.

"Yes, now!" He pushes harder. "It's supposed to start in two minutes."

"But…." Rory tries.

"Ace," he interrupts. "This is an once-in-a-lifetime celestial event. Get going."

"Okay, okay." She caves with a smile and drops her books on the ground by the door. "I'm getting, I'm going."

"Are you running?" Logan teases.

"I'm running! I'm running," Rory heaves as she jogs up the flight of stairs leading to the roof. "Who knew you were such an astronomy buff?"

"Hurry!"

"What has gotten into you?" she asks wondering why he is acting so weird as she flings open the door leading out on to the roof.

"Nice night," Logan says closing his cell phone.

Rory's jaw drops being so surprised to see him standing there. "Oh, my god! You're here!" she screams running to him. "What are you doing here?"

Logan chuckles, "Happy to see me?"

"Beyond happy." She hugs him. "Ecstatic! I can't believe you're here!" she beams and then suddenly pouts. "And look at me, I'm covered inn highlighter ink and I smell like Fritos and ginger ale."

Logan shakes his head. "It's an aphrodisiac."

Rory looks around at the food and lights set up everywhere and turns to him in marvel. "You are here and you did all this?"

"You like?" he asks arrogantly.

"I love," Rory admits, "but you didn't have to do this. I mean, you're here. It's enough. It's more than enough."

She smiles and leans in as he does and they share a blissful kiss.

"So there is no meteor shower?" she asks for clarification.

"No meteor shower."

Rory smirks, "So you used the entire cosmos to trick me?"

"I like to think big," Logan laughs.

"So, what's going on? What, why are you here?" she asks still amazed that he is standing here in front of her and isn't 3000 miles and an ocean away.

"I'm kissing my girlfriend on the roof," he says in a _duh! _tone and kisses her again.

"But why?" she questions when he pulls away.

"The Fritos and ginger ale thing. I told you, huge turn-on."

Rory sighs. "Explain yourself. You said it would be two weeks."

"I'm just here for a quick business trip." He laughs.

"How quick?"

"Too quick."

"How quick is too quick?" Rory asks annoyed with his vagueness.

"I have a 10:00 flight back to London, tomorrow night."

She frowns, "Oh that is too quick."

"Yes it is, so let's make the most of it," he says.

"Um, so what's that amazing smell?"

"Food from Ibiza."

"The island?" she gasps, clearly impressed.

He shakes his head. "The Tapas place downtown."

"Ohh." She smiles suddenly extremely hungry. "Did you get the duck?"

"I did." He nods.

"And the short ribs?"

"Yes, and…." He holds up a bottle of wine.

She gasps. "Ohh! A 2003 red something." She claps. "Oh I bet it's very oaky and corky and full of fruity legs."

"Know a lot about wine do you?" Logan laughs.

"Not so much," she giggles. "But the label's pretty."

"There's also gazpacho, the cheese pie thing you love, and flan."

"Ohh, flan! You got me flan?"

Logan grins, "It doesn't take much to make you happy, does it?"

"Not when you're on this continent." She smiles sweetly.

"Okay," Logan hands her the bottle. "Why don't you open this wine? I want to taste those fruity legs, and I'll make you a plate with extra flan."

"Okay," Rory walks away and starts to open the bottle but then stops and runs to Logan. "Ohh! I'm so glad you're here," she cries hugging him again.

After they get their picnic together and are comfortably seated on the ground Logan leans on her a bit. "So how has everything been going back here?"

"What do you mean?" Rory asks with a mouth full of flan.

"You know with your Mom and everything?"

"I don't know," Rory shrugs sadly. "Everything is all over the place. I mean I never really realized how much I depended on her, I mean even when we weren't speaking I knew she was there but now she's not. She's just a totally different person and I miss her, you know?"

"I know how hard this has been on you."

She nods. "Sometimes, I just feel like screaming at her. She is so self absorbed, but I can't do that. So I just kind of put myself on autopilot around her, and don't think about it."

"I'm sorry, Ace," he says sincerely.

Rory smiles. "It's alright. At least, I think it will be eventually."

Luke stays with Lorelai for the rest of the day but they are both very quiet with each other. Luke gets the ring off her finger and gives it back to her but she can't help but wonder if she's upset him by putting it on but decides against asking him about it.

Lorelai spends majority of her day on the couch and Luke spends his working on things around the house. The new washer and dryer arrive so he installs them. He gets the garbage disposal up and running. Adds a lock to the bathroom door, things like that.

Lorelai tries not to think about him. She tries not to feel like he is avoiding her. She wonders if she should tell him about the memories that are starting to return. She wonders if that will make him feel any better about hanging around her.

She walks over to the spot where April pointed out to her that the DVD's were and flips through them looking for something bearing the title The Way We Were. It doesn't take her long to find a case with Barbra Streisand and Robert Redford on the cover. It takes her a second to figure out how to open the case but once she pries the thing open a thick wad of papers stuffed into an envelope falls into her lap.

Carefully she picks up the white package with Luke's name on it, rips the flap open, unfolds the pages inside and begins to read.

_Dear Luke,_

_It's June third and we were supposed to be married today. I can't help but wonder now what that would've been like. If my mother would have helped me get dressed. If my father would have cried while giving me away. How happy I would have been at thought of being with you forever…but thinking about just makes me hurt worse. My heart is so broken I don't think repair is possible but I'm going to try. I'm going to try to move on, go forward. What choice do I have?_

_I went to the doctor yesterday and found out I'm pregnant. Yeah, about six weeks. That means the baby is yours. My guess is that it happened on my birthday. That was the last time we were…together. To tell you the truth I almost wish that this baby wasn't yours, or better yet that I wasn't pregnant at all. That I didn't have to share him or her with you or ever deal with you on anything concerning this child because it hurts. Seeing you around town is eating me up inside. I'm trying not to think about you or how much I love you or about what our life might have been like but how can I not do that when a part of you is living inside of me._

_I'm so scared, Luke. I'm not sixteen anymore, it'll be so much harder to be a single mother this time around and while I have no doubt that you will be around for your kid there is still no one here for me. I've done this before. I know what it's like to go days without adult conversation. To have no one to confide in over your worries or fears or frustrations._

_It's not fair. What I did to you was wrong. It was horrible and I shouldn't have done it, but I felt like I was being pushed out by a twelve year old. You never wanted me around. You've made that abundantly clear over the past few months. You don't need me anymore, haven't for awhile now, and I know you'll never want me again but I'm so pissed at you for breaking me. For turning me into this person who feels like they can't go on in life because they were rejected._

_I hate not knowing what I am going to do or who I am going to be without you._

_I hate being afraid._

_I hate living here without you but what choice do I have?_

_We're over._

_You'll never see this letter but don't worry I'll tell you about the baby at some point. I'm not Anna, there won't be someone with your eyes showing up at the diner in twelve years claiming to be yours. I just have to deal with things on my own first…wrap my head around it. Get use to the idea._

_I still love you Luke. All the little broken pieces of my heart still belong to you and I'm pretty sure it always will. I'm shaking too hard to continue so I hope this is legible._

_Love Always,_

_Lorelai_

Lorelai lays in her bed thinking about the events of her day. She wishes she had tried harder with Luke and not have been in her own head so much. She wishes she would have shown him the letter or told him about the things she remembers.

She doesn't want to appear needy or vulnerable but she doesn't want to sleep alone, and suffer from that nightmare again either. It seemed that when Luke was with her,he kept her safe even while she was unconscious.

Glancing at the clock, Lorelai can see that it is well past midnight. She throws back the covers on her bed and climbs out, leaving her bedroom. In the hallway Lorelai stands in front of the closed white door, takes a breath and knocks quietly. A few seconds later a very tired diner owner appears, rubbing his eyes, wondering what could be going on so late in at night.

"Lorelai, are you okay?" He panics almost instantly.

"Yeah, I'm fine I just…can I sleep in here?" she asks him getting straight to the point.

Luke moves to the side giving her room to come in.

"Are you sure?" she asks hesitantly as she walks past him and sits down on the flannel sheets of his bed.

"I don't mind," he reassures her as he goes around to the other side and slides back under the covers. "We should get some sleep."

"Yeah," she agrees happily surprised to find that his pillows smell like him. She positions it to her liking and moves back a little so that she almost laying against him, closes her eyes and falls asleep.

**Also, I have a new story. **** The Broken Road. Check it out. And Don't forget to Review.**


	12. Acts

**So…its been awhile. A long while. Like what two years? I know I promised you guys something like two years ago but …. What can I say? I don't know. I am so sorry. I guess I'll have to leave it at that. I have more coming…. But I know I'll have to prove it to you. That's okay. I'll get your trust back…If you are still with me that is… I have missed you guys so much! I hope you're still with me. **

Acts

It isn't unusual for Luke to be up before the first light of the sun. Even on days he doesn't have to get up and go into the diner his internal clock never allows him to sleep in too late; but last night was different because he hardly slept at all. He just couldn't turn off his brain after Lorelai climbed into bed with him, although, she seemed to be sleeping just fine. He glances over at her at her and can make out her silhouette in the dark. He hopes that her dreams are better tonight, that they are good dreams, instead of the nightmares she'd been having.

Being up all night has given him the chance to think about this odd situation they have found themselves in. He seemed to be replaying the entire last year's events in his brain like a movie up for review. He had gotten the girl of his dreams and lost her, and in a weird way gotten her back again, in such a short span of time. What is surprising is that his head isn't spinning from the rush of it all. How unprepared for this whole thing he was, the accident that is. He knew that taking care of Lorelai would be hard but he never imagined the stress and mental exhaustion that comes from dealing with a defiant teenager, hormonal at that, 24 hours a day 7 days a week. He wonders how Emily and Richard did it the first time, which is a thought he never imagined would cross his mind. Exhaustion aside, he made Rory a promise and he'd never go back on it. Not for anything in the world. Even if he hadn't, he wouldn't be able to entrust her care to anyone else. He will take whatever she has to dish out to him because he loves her and even though he took her for granted once, she is the only thing matters to him anymore.

He watches her sleep for a few minutes. The steady rise and fall of her chest is much more comforting to him now that she is safe in his bed and not in the cold chambers of the hospital, lost to the world for an undetermined amount of time. That was the scariest thing he'd ever experienced, even more frightening than losing his mother and his father. It helps that she looks more like herself now with all the bruising almost completely gone. Watching her sleep, he knows exactly what he is fighting for. He knows that somewhere inside that kid that woke up in Lorelai's body is the woman he is going to marry and he'll do anything to get her back. She just needs a little more time.

Leaning down he plants soft sweet kiss on her forehead, much in the way he did every morning when he had to leave before she woke when they were still together….really together. Back when Lorelai was still Lorelai and he was the man she picked. He sees a stray curl and gently tucks it behind her ear before quietly slipping out of bed. Although it is still very early, he has a lot of things to do. Today is the first day that Lorelai will be left with the day nurse while he goes to work and he isn't sure how she is going to react to that. He needs to clean up the house, which is still a little wrecked from moving in and make everything presentable before the nurse and Emily arrive and he also has to get April up and off to school. He also notes that at some point he needs to call Anna and Rory to give them updates. He makes a list in his head as he climbs in the shower.

Even though he wishes that he could just stay home with her a few more days, he knows that a little separation is probably best for them. The past few days with Lorelai have been complicated at best. Like a hormonal teen, her moods range from really high to, well, really high on the opposite spectrum. He has learned quickly that his former bride-to-be has somewhat of a quick temper – it's like a fury, really – when she is angry. However, with the bad also comes the good. Happy to see that her quick wit and sarcastic sense of humor was something that she always had, he found that when she wasn't being so hostile she was really easy to talk to. He has also noticed how curious she is about everything, which is understandable when the last twenty years have completely been erased from your memory. No, having him there all day would only frustrate her. She would take his devotion to her as hovering, and there is nothing worse for someone thought to be so independent. She needs her space, and he appreciates that, because in some ways he needs his too. He also needs to be sure that his business is still standing.

Staring at his tired face in the mirror, Luke quickly shaves and brushes his teeth before getting dressed and walking back into the bedroom. Glancing over at the bed he sees that the noise from his shower hasn't disturbed her at all as she sleeps on with her un-weighted hand resting on her stomach. He smiles.

He wishes he'd had the opportunity to know about April when Anna found out she was pregnant. Not only then, but when she was a baby, a toddler, and a little girl with a curiosity that he just knows she had. That is something he realizes he missed out on, but now, seeing their child grow inside of Lorelai and feeling him kick and move means more to him than there are words to describe. Luke is just glad he gets to be here for it all now. He would never be as back and forth as Christopher was with Rory.

He walks down the hall to April's room and coaxes her into getting up. He has to get her to school all the way in Woodbury. When he is sure that April is up and getting ready for school he goes down stairs to get her something to eat for breakfast. He makes her something quick, a bagel and some oatmeal, and sets it down for her to eat hoping that she doesn't take too long to get ready. Not one to disappoint, April makes her way downstairs just as Luke is sitting down with his own food.

"Morning, Dad," she says cheerfully as she takes the place that has become hers at the table. "Did Lorelai have a better night last night?"

Not wanting to let his daughter in on the fact that Lorelai slept in his bed, he simply nods. "Yes, I think so. But you can ask her when you come home."

April looks up at him mid bite into her bagel with a muddled expression and pulls the food away from her face. "But you said I could spend the night with Marcia tonight! You didn't change your mind did you?"

The realization dawns on him that he forgot. "Of course. That's right. I'm sorry, April. No. I haven't changed my mind. You can still go as long as her parents are okay with it."

"They are!" She smiles and goes back to eating her breakfast.

Genuinely curious, Luke looks over at her. "So, what do you think of it here, so far? Do you like the house? I mean, I know it's a little weird but…" he begins hoping that he is giving his daughter enough of his time and attention.

She smiles. "Don't worry Dad! I'm having fun! I mean, yes, it is a little weird, but what isn't? Everything takes some getting used to sometimes. Aside from the bipolar mood swings, Lorelai is great and I love the house! I like that I am able to have my own room here and everything."

Luke lets out a breath of relief. "Good." He starts to clean up the kitchen as April dives into a story about something that happened at school.

When breakfast is over he takes her to school and she assures him she will be fine and that Marcia's mother will bring her home in the morning. "Bye Dad!" She waves as she walks away from his old pickup truck and toward the large brick building.

The smell of coffee drifts through the house like a feather in wind, traveling from the kitchen where Luke turned the pot on, up the stairs and into the bedroom where he left Lorelai sleeping. As if cued by the scent of sweet caffeine her eyes open. Laying there for a moment, she thinks back to the night before. How she crept into Luke's room in the middle of the night and was immediately at ease beside him. She wonders how it is possible for something to feel so right and so wrong at the same time. She knows that she feels something for him but it can't be love. Not yet. Maybe she loved him once but she doesn't even know who he is now. Not to mention the difference in their age mentality. She is so confused. Not just about Luke, but about everything, and she is pretty sure that things aren't suddenly going to become clear for her overnight. She has so much to say, to tell him, but at the same time she isn't sure he is someone she can trust completely yet.

The smell of coffee gets stronger. It's like the aroma is personally calling her name. "Maybe tomorrow…." She hears in her head and can't help but smile. He made her coffee. Closing her eyes contently for a moment her tranquil thoughts of caffeine are interrupted by footsteps in the hall and turns her head toward the door.

He walks in the room and smiles, "Good morning, Sleepyhead! How'd you sleep?"

"Pretty good." Lorelai yawns as she sits up and smiles at him. "Thanks for letting me crash in here last night, by the way."

"Not a problem," he says coming over to take a seat beside her.

Noting the sluggishness in his step and the dark circles under his eyes her smile fades a little. She wonders if her sleeping in his bed kept him up and he is just too polite to say anything to her about it. "How about you?" she asks with a hint of candid worry in her voice. He shrugs attempting to displace her concern and get her mind on other things. "Pretty good…. Are you hungry?"

As if cued her stomach rumbles and she laughs out loud.

"I'll take that as a yes," he teases.

She looks down at her stomach and rubs it before looking back up at Luke with a wicked grin in her eyes. "Well my name is Lorelai Gilmore..."

He rolls his eyes playfully. "Come on, I made you some breakfast."

Luke offers her and hand and helps her up. Her eyes get big as she allows him to help her into a standing position, "And coffee?" she asks knowingly.

He laughs, thinking, some things never change. "Maybe there is coffee."

"Only maybe?"

He shakes his head. "Come on, Lorelai…." he leads her downstairs and helps her take a seat at the table. She isn't as resistant to help today, he notes to himself. Maybe that is a good sign.

Watching as he walks over to the counter where their plates are waiting, she waits patiently as he gets the food then walks back to the table. He sets a large round plate in front of her.

She grins. "Someone deserves a standing ovation," she compliments with admiration in her tone. "This looks wonderful Luke."

"Thanks. I actually have something else for you as well," he returns before going back in the kitchen and returning with two mugs. He sets a cup of dark hot liquid in front of her.

"Coffee!" She claps clearly excited.

Luke laughs. "Thought you might enjoy that." He sits down beside her and watches as she takes a sip.

Lorelai inhales the aroma of her sweet addiction before bringing the to her lips and enjoying what feels like her first taste of Luke's coffee. "Oh My God!" she exclaims. "What did you put in this? It's amazing!"

"I'm glad you like it," he tells her clearly amused.

"It's like liquid gold or something," she continues before taking another sip. "Or whatever the edible equivalent to gold is because pretty sure that gold doesn't taste this good!"

"Well I am glad you like it… better make it last though. That's the only cup you're getting!"

"What!" Lorelai pouts. "No fair, Luke! You can't just introduce a girl to coffee like this and then deny her anymore. That's gotta be against the law or something."

Luke sighs. He knew that making her coffee was a bad idea but he thought it might make her a little less on edge. "I'll make you decaffeinated coffee."

"It's not the same…." she whines with a completely bummed out look on her face.

"Lorelai," hestarts carefully, not wanting to upset her but wanting her to understand. "lots of caffeine isn't good for the baby."

The look on her face tells him that she never even thought about how the things she puts in her body can affect the baby. She looks down as she sighs. "I know… Sometimes I forget that I can't have everything I used to," she says playing with the handle on the mug. "I'm not trying to be selfish. I just miss coffee that's all." He doesn't say anything, just watches as she pushes the cup away from her. "I don't need anymore…. "she finishes quietly "I've already hurt the baby enough."

Almost immediately Luke feels guilty. "Lorelai," he sighs. "I didn't mean you shouldn't have any. I don't think one cup a day will hurt anything but more than is probably pushing it… "

She nods but doesn't look up.

"You know the accident…what happened wasn't your fault," he offers, unsure if that was what she meant by hurting the baby.

With tears in her eyes she looks up at him. "How do you know, Luke? I wasn't wearing my seatbelt. That is what they said. Not only that but…. What on earth was I doing out there in the dark, driving in the rain…what was I thinking? I could have killed him."

Luke doesn't know what to say. He had no idea she was feeling so much guilt over the accident that, of course, she didn't cause and had no control over. "You just had a lot on your mind…. I'm sure that is why you forgot to put your seat belt on. I don't think you knew it was going to rain or you wouldn't have been driving. You hate driving in the rain, but you were desperate to get home to Rory."

"I should have never left," she mumbles shaking her head feeling completely overemotional. All of this over a cup of coffee.

Luke leaves his chair and kneels down in front of her taking her hand in his. "Lorelai, look at me, please?" She doesn't want to at first but the urgent and caring tone of his voice convinces her to look up. He smiles at her. "The accident wasn't your fault. It was a very tired truck driver's fault. He fell asleep at the wheel and lost control and there was nothing you or anyone else could have done to change it. It wasn't your fault. You took very good care of yourself before the accident. The doctor said so. You didn't do anything wrong. Please don't beat yourself up over this."

Shocked at the way he's gotten down in front of her, she realizes just how much he hates seeing her upset. Doing her best to smile for him she nods and laughs at herself a little for being so irrational. "I'm sorry, I'm such a wreck."

"You're not," he assures her.

"I'm a mess," she confesses wiping at her eyes.

Luke sits back down in his chair and takes a couple bites of eggs. "You know… I think you're pretty put together considering…."

"You're just saying that!" She grins looking down at her own untouched plate of food. Picking up her fork she thinks that he might just be the one she needs to open up to as Luke glances over at the clock. "Has Rory called Luke?" she asks as he realizes that Emily and the day nurse could be arriving at any moment.

He looks down at her, confused, wondering if she was starting to miss her daughter…if maybe that was part of the process of regaining her memory. "Rory?" he questions hopefully.

"Yeah… I mean… I haven't seen her since she left the other day after my little outburst and I never got the chance to say I'm sorry…. Is she still mad at me?"

Happy that she is even asking for Rory, Luke smiles and shakes his head. "Oh, no. I don't think so. She called yesterday to check on you… I think she just wanted to give you some time to adjust to things around here."

Unsure of herself she mutters, "Oh… maybe I can send her a message or something on that phone."

He nods. "I think that sounds like a great idea. I'm sure she'd love to hear from you." She smiles and he takes his opportunity. "So…" He begins uneasily. "I'm going back to work today…."

Lorelai puts her fork down and looks up at him as an apprehensive feeling spreads through her. "You are."

He nods again. "Yes." She knows that that isn't all he wanted to say, she also knows whatever comes out of his mouth next is going to be there part that has to do with her. "And…"

"And… your mother is on her way here."

Lorelai frowns. The last thing she wants to do is spend the day arguing with her mom. "My mother is spending the day with me?" she asks thinking she already knows the answer.

"Not exactly…."

Confused doesn't even begin to describe it as Lorelai furrows her brows trying to figure out what he is trying to tell her. "Can we please stop talking in riddles Luke, what is going on?"

"Well…." He takes a deep breath. "Your mom hired a day nurse."

"For me?" Hearing that was the last thing she expected to hear. She thought they were starting to trust her. She thought that maybe she could trust them. Well not Emily Gilmore, she knows better than that but Luke…she was really starting to warm up to him. She thought that he was on her side. "I do not need a baby sitter!" she says, anger welling up inside her.

He knew that she would react this way. That she would take their harmless gesture as another way of trying to control her. "We know you don't Lorelai, I just don't think you're ready to be here by yourself all day. What if something happens? You are still recovering from a major head injury and surgery… if something happened no one would be able to get to you!"

"I can take care of myself!" She looks away from him folding her arms across her chest rebelliously. "I don't need a nurse!"

He sighs. "I was just trying to be up front with you..." he hoped that he would be able to convince her before Emily arrived but as he hears the doorbell chime he realizes that he isn't going to get that chance. He stands up.

Lorelai doesn't move, going into her pattern of completely shutting down when she doesn't get her way. Luke runs he hands over his face, stands up and walks to the door.

Emily steps inside as he opens the door. "Good morning, Luke," she begins pointedly. "How are you doing this morning?" Without waiting for him to answer she walks down the hall in search of her daughter. "Lorelai!"

"I'm doing great…" Luke mumbles sarcastically, knowing that she isn't listening. He turns his attention outside and sees a car pull up behind Emily's and a small woman with short brown hair and dressed in scrubs steps out carrying a bag that looks to be about as big as she is. Luke watches her up the walkway and waits to let her in.

Emily walks into the kitchen and sees Lorelai sitting at the table with agitated written across her face. "Good morning Lorelai."

Lorelai, shifts herself a little, and looks up at her mother coldly. "I do not need a nurse!"

Emily laments, "Lorelai, can we please not do this today?"

"I can't believe you guys keep going behind my back! I am fine!"

"You are not fine. In fact you are the complete opposite of fine. No one here is doing anything for the mere amusement of making you angry. The reality is that Luke has a business to run, he cannot stay here with you all day, Rory has school, and I am certain that you do not want me sitting up here all day…" she begins taking a seat at the table, "You need someone here to help you on the stairs, and to make you meals, and to be here if something…if anything goes wrong! Besides we would all feel a lot better knowing that you are being looked after. And you cannot argue with that because you know I am right!

Lorelai huffs. Part of her knows her mother is right and she needs to stop being such a baby but part of her swears up and down that she really can do everything all by herself. Back when she was in the hospital that is what everyone who came to visit kept going on and on about. That no matter what she was going through she always took care of herself and of Rory without any help from anyone. And the irrational part of her brain stubbornly refuses to relent, she sees however, that she really has no choice in the matter.

Luke leads the mousy looking nurse into the kitchen to where Lorelai and Emily are sitting. The woman sets her bag down on the table. She is much younger than Lorelai. She barely looks old enough to drive much less have graduated from nursing school. Emily had a few complaints about that but on such short notice she'd just have to deal. She smiles and Lorelai looks up at her dark brown eyes. "Hi! I'm Olivia Hollis…you much be Lorelai!" She extends her hand to the disconcerted looking woman. Lorelai notes her incredibly southern accent and wonders where in the world this girl is from. She glances over at her mom and then at Luke before rolling her eyes and shaking Olivia's hand.

"Nice guess," she says miserably pulling her hand back.

Luke notices the hostility and hopes that Lorelai doesn't keep it up for long. He glances at the clock again and realizes he is already running late. He smiles at the women in the room. "I'm sorry about this, but I have to get to the diner."

"Yes, of course," Emily says halfheartedly. "Have a nice day, Luke."

Olivia smiles at him and shakes his hand again like she did when she came in the door with that huge bag on her shoulder. "It was real nice meeting you Luke."

"You too, Olivia," he says politely.

After a long pause in which Lorelai says nothing, Luke walks over to her. "I know you're mad but this really isn't as bad as it seems?" he says fighting the desire to lean down and kiss the top of her head. "Call me if you need me."

Lorelai, in her own head doesn't want anything to do with this but more than that she really doesn't want Luke to leave her and scares her that she feels so attached to him. Letting up on her façade, just enough for him to see a glimpse of the one he loves, she looks up. "Bye Luke…"

He smiles, "Bye Lorelai," he says before quickly waving to the other two women, grabbing his keys off the bar and walking out the door.

Olivia moves her enormous bag from the table to the floor and takes a seat. "How are you feeling today, Lorelai?"

Lorelai looks at Emily who had her arms folded across her chest expecting her daughter to say something remotely polite to this woman. She looks back at Olivia. "Fine I guess."

"You're not having any pain or discomfort?" She continues pulling out a manila folder with Lorelai's name on it.

"Nope," Lorelai answers shortly.

"So, you're about six months pregnant, is that right?" she asks seemingly unaffected by Lorelai's obvious distain.

The Gilmore girl looks down at her swollen stomach crosses her arms over it, "Something like that."

"Twenty-five weeks?" the nurse asks for conformation.

Lorelai relaxes, being so hostile isn't going to make the situation any better, and it's not Olivia's fault that no one thinks she can do anything for herself. She is just so tired of being examined and asked the same questions over and over again when she knows the answers are sitting right there in that file in front of her. "Look, I'm still pretty tired. I just want to go back to bed for a while…is that okay?"

Olivia closes the file. "Yes, ma'am. Of course…whatever you want."

Lorelai smiles at her a little and then looks at her mother, "Sorry for freaking out on you," she apologizes as she struggles to get up.

Olivia stands and helps her to her feet. "Are you sure I can't give you a look over real quick before you go upstairs?"

"No really," Lorelai reassures her. "I'm just a little tired. I'll be in a better mood later."

"I'll help her up to her room Olivia," Emily offers. "Why don't you go ahead and get familiar with the house?"

Olivia smiles and waits while she takes her daughters arm. "Yes ma'am."

Lorelai looks over at Emily skeptically, "I can walk upstairs by myself mother," she says simply, all the hostility having left her voice and been replaced with uncertainty.

"Let me help you, Lorelai," Emily returns. "There is nothing wrong with accepting a little help once in a while," she says as begins to walk, giving her daughter zero opportunity to put up at fight.

Lorelai relents and keeps her mouth shut allowing her mother to help her up the stairs and back through the double doors. "Do you want me to stay?" Emily asks and her daughter can't help but wonder where all of this is coming from. Were they not just arguing a few minutes ago?

She pushes the thought out of her mind and only worries about getting her mother away from her. "No. I'll be fine…I just need some rest that's all," Lorelai guarantees her.

Convinced that Lorelai is finally starting to calm down, Emily smiles. "Alright then." She walks to the door and looks back at her little girl. "Sleep well."

"Thanks Mom." Lorelai smiles back before watching Emily leave the room closing the double doors behind her. She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath before deciding she is just not tired and getting up.

Emily sits with Olivia goes over a few things for Lorelai's care plan. They map out a schedule and go over her diet. Olivia will take Lorelai to her doctor's appointments, and make her meals, and keep her from getting too excited about things, if Lorelai wants to go somewhere or do something then Olivia will be there to help her. "So, you will be here by 8 and you'll stay until 6 Monday through Friday, correct?"

"Yes, ma'am," Olivia smiles. "Mr. Danes said that he is going to come every day at lunch to check on her and I am sure you'll be coming around as well and her daughter. I will make sure that she doesn't do it too much."

Emily nods, "Good. I must warn you Miss Hollis my daughter is a very stubborn woman even more so now that her memory is gone. I am afraid she has lost all her sense of reason. She is like a teenager, and it's incredibly frustrating."

"I'm sure she is just trying to adjust," Olivia offers. "Which is understandable…I think that once she gets used to me being here everything will be okay. She won't be so resistant to help."

As the women talk neither one of them seem to notice someone coming down the stairs. Having gotten herself dressed, Lorelai fights the pain as she grips the railing and as slowly and quietly as possible walks downstairs. When she reaches the bottom she gives herself a minute to catch her breath. She can hear the voices drifting in from the living room and is relieved that she made it down. Lorelai sees the table by the door where Emily's purse sits. She looks at the door, and making a quick and sudden decision she grabs her mother's keys and wallet before turning the knob, the door squeaks a little as it opens and she stops, looks back and holds her breath as she waits to be caught. They don't come though. Emily and Olivia are too caught up in their conversation to realize she is making a break for it. Lorelai pushes the door open farther and steps out on to the porch closing the door behind her.

**Please Review! It keeps me inspired. **

**Ch. 13 should be up this weekend. (fingers crossed) :D**


	13. Stars

**Hi! Okay, so it took two weeks but two weeks is better than two years in my book! Thanks for all the kind reviews you guys. They really make this so much more fun. I love to know what you think. So... I think I asked this before but I am going to go ahead and pose the question again... Rory and Logan? Yes or no? I am willing to hear you out on any other ship except Dean! Enjoy and dont forget to review! :) **

Stars (Hollow)

Lorelai runs her hands along the steering wheel and takes a deep breath as she slides the key into the ignition. She knows that what she's doing is seven types of illegal. She also knows that her Mom, Rory, maybe even Luke will blow up if… no, when, they figure out that she is gone, but she just needs to get out for a little while. It's only been two days but being locked up in that house feels like being held down with a pillow over her face. She slowly turns the key, as if her unhurried movements will quiet the roar of the engine. The car isn't loud though. With her foot on the brake she turns a little and grabs hold of the seatbelt, pulls it across her body and clicks it in place before returning her free hand to the wheel. She winces at the pain of the movement, and takes a calming breath before continuing. She'd be lying if she said she wasn't nervous but she takes a deep breath to remind herself that the accident that stole her memory wasn't her fault she wipes away her apprehension.

She shifts the car into reverse and takes her foot off the brake. _You've done this a thousand times!_ She hears in her head_. JUST DO IT!_

Her foot lightly touches the gas and she backs out of the driveway, looking over her shoulder. The back wheels of the car find the road and something flips inside her, she isn't sure however if its butterflies or her son. As she makes it out of the driveway and gets the car straightened out with her uncasted hand she starts to relax a little. Last she remembers she was only in Driver's Ed., but that doesn't change the countless number of times she and Christopher climbed into one of the cars their parents kept around for no good reason and went on a joy ride. She can drive.

She turns on the radio to relax herself a little more and after some channel surfing she lands on something she actually recognizes and a smile plays on her lips as Bonnie Tyler's voice fills the car. _"Every now and then I fall apart. And I need you now tonight, and I need you more than ever and if you only hold me tight, then we'll be holding on forever."_

Lorelai presses the gas and drives away from the house with no idea where she is going. She lets her mind wander.

* * *

Rory stands and kisses her boyfriend goodbye as he prepares to board a plane and go back to London.

"I'll miss you," she confesses honestly, arms wrapped so tightly around him that Logan isn't sure that she will let him go.

He sighs and rubs her shoulders, placing a soft kiss on her forehead. "I know, Ace…. I'll miss you too. But we'll see each other again soon."

"When?" Rory wonders out loud, unable to stop herself.

"We made plans for Christmas, remember?" He does his best to soothe her although he knows his efforts are fruitless. He knows that Rory is going through a lot. They spent most of last night talking about what a hard time she is having with all this but Logan honestly has no idea how to help her. His family was never close. Rory had to yell at Mitchum, his father, to even get him to come and visit him while he was in the hospital. He knows that the Gilmore's aren't like that. At least not Lorelai and Rory, even when they weren't speaking they were more connected to each other than they are now and it hurts him because it hurts Rory. He wishes he could stay and hold her together through it, or at least relate even a little bit to what she is going through so that he can at least give her some semblance of advice or something when they talk on the phone.

She pulls out of their embrace and looks up at him, "I know that just seems so far away." She smiles putting on the tough, I'm-going-to-be-okay exterior that he knows only too well. He saw it more often than he cared to during that long hiatus when Rory and her mother didn't say anything to each other.

He smiles back, there is nothing he can do for her now. If he doesn't leave now he'll miss his flight. He leans in and they kiss for a long minute before he pulls away and places a soft chaste kiss on her forehead. "I love you, Ace," he says honestly, "See you later."

Rory steps out of the way and watches him, smiles for him, lifting one hand in a sort of half wave she watches as he picks up his brief case and walks through the security line disappearing from her sight. It occurs to her how weird this seems. A year ago neither of them could have pictured themselves living this life. She wasn't speaking to her mother, she wasn't in school, she was living with her grandparents and working at the DAR but she had Logan then and all his crazy mixed up completely insane antics. He was hers then, really hers. And now they are cohabitating on opposite sides of the world, she is back in school and happy to be there, and to some degree she has her mother back but with no Logan. Rory sighs as she walks over to a bench in the lobby of the airport and sits down. She needs a few minutes to herself just to sort some things out.

She wishes she could call Lorelai. Physically she knows she can, but the woman on the other end of that phone isn't her mother. She isn't even someone Rory is sure she wants to know. Its almost comical to the twenty one year old to think that if she and her mother had gone to high school at the same time they wouldn't have been friends. They may not have even liked each other. Lorelai would have been the girl all the bad boys wanted, and she would have been the bookworm that nobody noticed that girls like Lorelai picked on.

She told her grandmother she was going to go up to the house today and check in on Lorelai, or Lore as she asked to be called back at the hospital, but Rory isn't all that sure she wants to. It isn't that she's not worried about her mother or concerned about her wellbeing but there is only so much of that girl that one person can take.

Then again, Rory reconsiders, she is probably just still hurting over Lorelai's outburst. She shouldn't have taken it so personally. Lorelai was obviously feeling overwhelmed about everything, and they pushed her. They shouldn't have pushed her.

She sighs heavily as she continues her mental tug of war and decides that she will go check on Lorelai. She has a free day and although she should probably spend it studying, there will more than likely be time for that later. Taking another couple minutes to herself, she gathers her things and eventually leaves the airport, walking back to her car and taking a ride to the place her mother raised her, Stars Hollow.

* * *

Lorelai pulls Emily's car into a parking space next to a sequence of shops or something she remembers from the tour Rory gave her on her way home from the hospital. She looks around at her handiwork and smiles thinking she'd done pretty well for someone who'd only had one week of parallel parking lessons. Grabbing her mother's wallet from the passenger seat she gathers her nerve and exits the car.

The first thing she notices about the square is that there are people everywhere. Lots of families and children running around everywhere, playing in the gazebo and with each other…getting dirty. Her mother would have a heart attack, but it brings a smile to her face and she inadvertently touches her stomach. "This is where you get to grow up, little man," she finds herself saying.

Lorelai's eyes dart around the square. She isn't sure yet whether she made the right decision coming here, or if she should have gone with her first instinct and gone to Hartford. No one would know her in Hartford and she wouldn't be getting the strange looks and stares that she is right now.

Deciding that since she is already here and people have already seen her, she might as well explore the town. Who knows…it may even help her get some of her memories back.

She looks around and noticed that there is so much going on around her. She glances over to the middle of the square where a large beautiful gazebo sits and beside it there is a table being occupied by a petite woman with a pixie haircut and a tall man with a goofy look on his face. They're wearing t-shirts the color of a yellow highlighter that say, "Support Stars Hollow Elementary" and they seem to be selling something. Curiously, Lorelai walks over.

The girl with short haircut looks up and sees the brunette sauntering over to them, she nudges her boyfriend beside her: he goes pale and gasps. "Lorelai!"

Her smile fades as she realizes whoever this person is knows who she is. Endless possibilities run through her mind, the top one being, what if he tells Luke? She quickly finds her smile again and laughs playing along, acting as if she is supposed to be here. "Yes, of course."

"Hi, Lorelai!" the woman says brightly.

He looks from Lorelai to Lulu back to Lorelai again. "What are you doing here?" Kirk asks obliviously. "Luke said you have to stay at home because of your accident. He said you weren't healed yet."

"Don't I look okay?" Lorelai smiles convincingly, wondering who this guy is and why he so concerned for her wellbeing.

"But your head…" Kirk says before lowering his voice and his head.

"It looked pretty normal when I left the house this morning…" she says sarcastically.

Lulu laughs, "You look amazing, Lorelai, as always. I think Kirk just meant-"

"Don't you have amnesia?" he asks for himself before his girlfriend can get it all out.

Lorelai laughs but doesn't answer his question at all, instead she asks one of her own. "What are these for?" she points at the tickets displayed in front of her on the table.

Lulu brightens again, "The elementary school I work at is hosting the fall carnival this year and Kirk and I thought it would be fun to help so we're selling raffle tickets! Would you like to buy one?"

She hesitates and but then smiles, "You know… I don't have any money with me, but how about a rain check?"

Lulu's grin never fades as she agrees.

As Lorelai stands and chats with Kirk and Lulu, across the street the phone tree has already begun.

Gypsy steps out of her shop, wiping her oily hands on a dirty rag when she looks out across the square and sees a familiar brunette standing by fall carnival booth. Her mouth drops as she absolutely doesn't believe what she is seeing. She doesn't know what to do first, run over and say hi or call somebody…. anybody… she decides to go with the latter and runs inside to grab her phone. She dials Andrew.

"Andrew, it's Gypsy!" the woman whispers as if somehow, Lorelai can hear her all the way across the street.

"Gypsy?" Andrew asks curiously, lowering his voice. "Why are you whispering?"

"Because… guess who's back?"

"What?"

"I said…guess who's back?"

"Back where?" Andrew asks curiously wondering where this secretive game of twenty questions is going to take them.

"Lorelai!" Gypsy says having already become frustrated with the man and returned back to her normal tone of voice.

Jackson Belleville walks to the front of Stars Hollow Books with his two young children, each of which has a brand new book in their hand. As he takes the books from the children he overhears the book store owner whisper the name Lorelai, and there are only two Lorelai's he knows in the entire world. He can't help but listen in on the conversation even though all he can make out are hushed tones, whispers, and scandalized gasps. Leaving the books on the counter her grabs his children and hurries out the door, to head to the inn, but before he has the chance to even get the kids in the van he sees what all the hushed tones and whispers were about. Quickly he pulls out his cell phone and calls Sookie. When he can't get her on her cell phone, he calls the inn.

"Dragonfly Inn, this is the general manager, Michel, speaking," the arrogant Frenchman says with a certain tone to his voice.

"Michel, its Jackson! Where is Sookie?"

The concierge tries not to laugh, "Well she is the cook, so it would stand to reason that she is in the kitchen, no?" he asks rhetorically.

"I don't have time for this, Michel, put Sookie on the phone!It's important!"

The Frenchman sighs, "Very well…" He removes the phone from his ear and carries it back to the kitchen. "Sookie," he says to the cook, "your vegetable man is on the phone."

"Jackson?" Sookie asks curiously, "I wonder what he could want."

"I do not know," Michel whines, "but he said it was important enough to tie up the business lines so…."

She wipes her hands on her apron and takes the phone, giving Michel a look of annoyance. "Hey Jackson…is everything okay? Are the kids okay?"

"Oh yeah… the kids are fine… I just thought you might like to know that Lorelai, is up and walking around Stars Hollow parading a baby bump around as if the town has never seen one."

Sookie gasps, "Does Luke know?"

"I don't know. I called you right away. She was talking to Kirk and Lulu but now she is moving on. What do I do?" he frantically asks.

"I don't know! Don't do anything! Luke said she is incredibly hostile right now, you don't want to freak her out."

"Are you talking about, Lorelai?" Michel interrupts. "What about her? I want to know."

"Hush, you," Sookie shushes him then goes back to Jackson, "Just- I don't know... keep an eye on her…but from a distance and I'll get out of here as soon as I can."

* * *

While Sookie and Jackson go back and forth, Miss Patty stands on the porch of her dance studio overlooking the town. She'd noticed Lorelai talking to Kirk and Lulu just as all the others had, but now seeing the girl walking toward her, she was getting all the scoop she needed. "Good morning, Doll, haven't see you around here in awhile," she gushes as Lorelai, slowly but surely approaches the building.

Lorelai smiles a little, "Yeah…"

"How are you doing?" Miss Patty continues trying to bait the winded woman into conversation.

Lorelai, not yet ready to admit this little venture out was a bad idea, "Oh…um…" she starts taking a couple breaths, "you know… I'm fine…"

Miss Patty notes that she doesn't look fine. "Are you sure? If you'd like you could come in and have a glass of water."

Lorelai is overwhelmed by the kindness of the people in this town, she's sure she's never met people so genuinely concerned over someone else's welfare. The thought of spending even another minute walking around out there without resting weighs on her and she decides to go inside.

Miss Patty helps Lorelai into a chair and then goes and gets her a glass of water, which Lorelai accepts graciously. "Thank you so much," she barely has time to get out before she starts drinking. Looking around the studio she sees a room with mirrors everywhere and ballet barres on the walls, so similar, yet at the same time so strikingly different from where she'd taken ballet classes at as a child.

"Oh, you're welcome, Dear," the older woman says taking a seat beside her. "We've been very worried about you around here."

"You have?" Lorelai questions, "Why?"

Miss Patty can't help but laugh, "Why, Dear, because you are a part of our community, our family." This makes Lorelai smile and she looks down into her glass of water.

* * *

Olivia and Emily continue to go over Lorelai's schedule in great detail Not only mapping out almost every possible aspect that can be coordinated but also going over her specific diet and tasks that Lorelai's doctor has given her the all-clear for and the ones that are strictly off limits. Although Olivia feels this type of schedule might be too restricting on her patient, she appeases her mother if for no other reason than to keep the peace.

Emily sets her teacup on the table. "Well I think I am going to head out. I have to pick up Richard's dry cleaning before noon and I am already cutting it close, I fear, with traffic."

Olivia smiles and nods, "Yes, ma'am, I understand."

"I think I'll just go up and check on Lorelai before I go."

Olivia takes their used dishes to the kitchen while the older woman heads up the stairs to check on her daughter. Slowly, trying to remain quiet so that she doesn't wake Lorelai up, she peeks inside the room.

Downstairs, Olivia hears a shrill scream and nearly jumps out of her skin before running up the stairs to check on the commotion.

"She's gone!" Emily exclaims in complete hysterics, hurrying back downstairs to check out what she already knows. She throws the front door open and runs outside to find, as suspected, her car has disappeared.

"Gone?" Olivia asks, a look of shock written all over her face, but Emily doesn't answer. The Gilmore woman already has her cell phone out and is calling her husband at a frantic pace.

* * *

In the corner of Luke's diner Miss Patty and Babette talk in hushed tones occasionally glancing over at Luke. He notices but doesn't want to be involved in whatever they have cooking at the moment. He begins to wipe down the counter taking a breath glad that the lunch rush is finally over and he has a second to himself. He puts down his rag and goes to tell Caesar that he is going to go check on Lorelai, when Kirk barrels into the diner and stands up at the counter bouncing up and down.

Luke watches him for a moment perplexed before giving in, "I know I am going to regret this but what the hell do you think you're doing Kirk?"

"I have to tell you something! I've been selling tickets to the fall carnival with Lulu and I couldn't leave the booth but she finally gave me a break so I came straight here…"

"Why?"

"Because, I saw Lorelai, and I thought you should know even though she told me not to tell you."

Luke looks at Kirk like he has lost his mind, which isn't an unusual look for Luke to have on his face. "What the hell are you talking about Kirk?"

"I saw Lorelai," Kirk repeats ready to tell Luke his entire story again but Luke shakes his head.

"No you didn't. Lorelai is at home resting."

"No!" Kirk says seriously. "She was at the booth talking to me and Lulu! Everyone saw. I'm not crazy!"

Luke mutters something under his breath as the diner falls silent. He walks over to the phone on the wall and dials a number. The southern nurse answers the phone.

"Olivia, this is Luke. Can I talk to Lorelai please?"

"I'm sorry, Mr. Danes. I don't exactly know how to tell you this but Miss Gilmore's not here…."

"Not there? What do you mean she is not there?" Luke asks agitated.

"She took Mrs. Gilmore's car…we don't know where she is. Mrs. Gilmore is on the phone with Mr. Gilmore right now trying to decide if they should call the police or not."

"No! Don't do that. Tell them not to do that!" he says placing his hand on his head feeling a headache coming on. "I'll find her. Tell Mrs. Gilmore I'll bring her home."

"Yes, sir," Olivia says quietly.

Luke sighs, "Alright, thanks Olivia, I'll be there as soon as I can."

"Okay, I'll tell Mrs. Gilmore," she says before they exchange goodbyes and hang up the phone.

"What have you done, Lorelai?" Luke mutters to himself, before pushing himself off the wall. "I'm leaving Caesar! Lane is in charge," he says as he grabs his things and walks out the front door leaving a dumfounded Kirk and a diner full of gossips behind him.

* * *

Rory passes the Stars Hollow sign lost in her own thoughts. She can't stop thinking about her relationship with Logan and wondering where they are going with it. They decided they would factor each other in to everything but she doesn't feel very factored in. Actually, she doesn't feel factored in at all. She wonders why Logan can't just tell his father to leave them alone. They can make it. She knows they can. But she doesn't think Logan is ready to give them a real chance. Not at the cost of being cut off completely. She sighs as she passes through the square and turns her head to the right to catch a glimpse of Luke walking out the diner and the look he has on his face makes her feel uneasy.

Something inside her tells her she needs to pull over so she brings the car to the curb and gets out. "Luke!" she calls running to catch up with him."

He stops and turns around relieved to see her. "Rory, did your grandmother call you?"

A thousand horrible thoughts cross her mind as to what could be going on. "Where is Mom?" she asks quickly, in place of answering his question.

"I- I don't know Rory," Luke tells her rubbing the back of his neck. "I just know we have to find her before something bad happens."

"What are you talking about?"

"Apparently she took your grandmother's car and has been wandering around town. I don't know why but she just took off, she didn't tell anyone she was leaving. No one knows where she is."

Rory takes a couple deep breaths torn between being terrified and furious. "Why would she do this?"

"I don't know Rory, I keep asking myself that… I honestly just don't know…. But we have to find her. We should split up, just look around town, old places she liked to go to before the accident. I don't know…"

"Alright," Rory mutters with no idea where she should look. "Call me if you find her."

"I will," Luke promises before turning around again and walking off in another direction.

Rory stands there for a minute feeling more annoyed than anything else. She closes her eyes and tries to think about where on earth her mother could be and decides to go to the inn. She walks back to her car and get in.

* * *

Back at the diner, Babette and Miss Patty carry on their conversation. "Well what did she say, Sugah?"

"It was so strange, Babs. She was so quiet. I didn't know what to make of it. She looked tired and she had this guilty air about her. I've never seen Lorelai like that before." She stops for a second. "You know what Babette,that's a lie. Do you remember the morning after Lane's wedding when I told her we would all cover for her drunken speech…. She looked a lot like she did then."

"Where did she go?"

Miss Patty sighs, "I don't know… I just let her leave. I didn't even ask."

**Part 2 of this will be up ASAP! :)  
Review please!**


	14. Daughters

Hola! Fellow fanfictioners. I missed you so much! Sorry this chapter took so long. (Geez, I sound like a broken record.) But here it is. Guess what guys? 11 more days and I'll be a high school graduate! YAY! Then comes the summer and with it more time to write. Okay, I'll leave you to it. Enjoy. 

Daughters

Emily stands on the porch of the big white house with a pensive look on her face. There is worry in her eyes and a deep apprehension in her demeanor. She's been standing in the same place, in the same position, for a long time now. Waiting, just like she was told to do just in case her daughter should come back. Olivia, the nurse she'd hired, sits in on the porch swing behind her. She'd decided not to leave until she was sure Lorelai was safe and that she'd still have a job to come back to tomorrow. It wasn't just that though, there was something about the older woman that made her sad. Something that said that the two elder Gilmore girls didn't have the relationship that she could tell the mother desperately wanted. And Emily did want it. She wanted it more than anything.

The first time Lorelai ran away from her it put a giant gaping hole in her heart. As she read that letter left on the dining room table all those years ago she felt her lungs constricting like she couldn't breathe. Her heart raced. Her blood ran cold. She'd felt it again when Lorelai went missing for those two long days. And yet again when she got the call about the accident. She hates this feeling and she wonders how she got to a place where her little girl felt the need to run all the time.

_A five year old with dark curls tumbling in clusters around her face danced into the living room in a pink dress. She did a twirl as her nanny trailed a good distance behind her. "Lorelai!" she called._

_The little girl giggled thinking she'd never be found as she got down on the floor and hid behind the drink cart._

_Kristen, the nanny, ran into the room and looked around. "Lorelai," she whispered with a smile. She could hear the child's laughter and knew exactly where she was hiding. She also knew that hide and seek was Lorelai's favorite game and since it was her birthday and it would undoubtedly keep her out of trouble she played along._

_Emily Gilmore walked in the house with her day planner in front of her face going over the check list for her young daughter's birthday party over again for the thousandth time. She glanced up entering the living room and saw the nanny looking around. "Kristen?"_

_"Good morning, Mrs. Gilmore," the young girl said turning around. She smiled shyly and glanced over at the drink cart to make sure that the little girl hadn't moved._

_Emily nodded towards her and started to look back down at the planner when she realized that something was missing. Well…someone. "Kristen, where is my daughter?" she all but demanded, closing her book and returning her stare to the young woman. _

_More tiny giggles filled the room._

"_She's um… hiding," Kristen answered meekly. _

_Lorelai crawled out from the tiny space revealing herself to the women in the room and stood up. "Here I am Mommy!" she proclaimed with her small child excitement. _

_Emily huffed. "Lorelai!" she began to scold. "What are you doing on the floor?"_

_The little girls smile started to fade as she recognized the sour look on her mother's face. "I was just playing," she replied sadly as she was picked up and looked over._

_"Look at this dress! It's all wrinkled!" Emily exclaimed annoyed before turning to Kristen. "How could you let this happen? You're supposed to be watching her." _

_"I-" Kristen started but was unable to defend herself. _

_"I am not paying you to be her playmate." _

_The young nanny looked down at the floor. "I'm sorry Mrs. Gilmore."_

_The mother sighed knowing there was nothing to be done about it now. Not with so much left to do before the party. "Have Candace make her breakfast and then take her for her morning walk. She can change into something more acceptable when she gets back," she said decisively handing her child over._

_Kristen sat Lorelai down on the floor and the little girl looked up at her pitifully, she took her hand silently, her mother still watching and led her into the dining room. Lorelai walked with her head down. She wanted so much for her mother to let her wear clothes she could run around and play in and get dirty in but she was always supposed to be dressed like a "lady"._

_She sat down at the dining room table with her arms folded across her chest glaring at her mother angrily as she entered the room and sat down at the table with her daughter._

"_Lorelai," Emily sighed seeing the look. "Please do not look at me like that. You were the one crawling around on the floor and you were the one who wrinkled your pretty dress," she said turning her attention back to her day planner and away from her daughter._

_A few minutes later Kristen came back carrying Lorelai's breakfast but the child turned her nose up at the green vegetable coming out of her omelet in disgust. "I don't want that."_

"_Lorelai," her mother warned, too involved in what she was doing to even look up at her daughter. _

_"I don't want it!" she said again but a little louder this time._

_The older Gilmore rolled her eyes. She didn't have time for Lorelai's defiance. Not when there was still so much to be done. "Lorelai, I am warning you! Eat your breakfast or I am canceling your birthday party! Do you understand me?"_

_Lorelai looked down at her plate. It was her birthday. She thought she should at least get to eat what she wanted on her birthday. _

_"I said, do you understand me?" Her mother repeated. _

_Lorelai sighed. "Yes," she answered in a small voice then reluctantly picked up her fork to eat. Emily looked back down at her planner as her daughter took a small bite before making a horrible face. "Yuck!"_

_Emily looked up again. "What is it?" she asked exasperated. _

_"I don't like the green stuff," Lorelai whined in return._

"_It's spinach. It's good for you."_

_Lorelai put her fork down on the table. "It tastes like feet!"she said, not wanted to eat anymore._

_Emily closed her day planner and looked at her daughter with all the seriousness in the world. "Then you won't get your party."_

_"But Mommy!" Lorelai protested as her blue eyes widened in horror. _

_"But nothing-" her mother snapped. "Either you eat your breakfast without another word or I am putting an end to this party." _

_The little girl looked down at the plate again sadly. She picked up her fork and stuck another piece of grotesque egg in her mouth._

"_Now was that so bad?" her mother asked condescendingly standing up from the table. She'd never get any work done sitting there with Lorelai being so difficult. She looked at the nanny. "She isn't to get up from this table until she finishes it all."_

_Kristen nodded knowing she is already on thin thin ice with her employer. "Yes, Mrs. Gilmore." _

_"Good." Emily got up and left the room but stopped just outside the door looking for the number to the bakery making her daughters cake._

"_I don't like this Kristen," she heard her daughter say miserably._

_In the dining room the young caregiver looked over her shoulder to be sure her employer had left the room before exhaling slowly and looking down at Lorelai. Truthfully she loved Lorelai and hated to see her so unhappy. She smoothed back the little girl's hair and whispered. "I know Sweetie, but it's good for you and your Mom wants you to eat it and she's the boss, so just do it okay? For me, please?" The woman had a certain softness to her voice. There was something comforting about it and hearing it standing just outside the dining room, Emily looked up no longer concerned with the phone number. "Listen," Kristen continued. "If you hurry maybe we'll have time to stop by the park on our walk, what do you say?"_

_Smiling Lorelai agreed and started to eat her breakfast with no complaint. "Kristen," she said, "I wish you could be my mommy." _

_Emily dropped the book. It felt like someone had punched her in the stomach or ripped her heart out. And Emily wasn't sure which part hurt her the most. The little girl's general statement or the way she cried and cried when her mother fired Kristen the very next day._

Lorelai walks down a long dirt road. She has no idea where she is or where she's going but for the first time in a long time, she doesn't feel like she is lost. It is like there is some invisible force there pulling her, guiding her somewhere that she has forgotten she is supposed to remember. There aren't any people on this road, nor any cars, but Lorelai isn't scared. Somewhere deep inside her she knows this isn't aimless wandering. The baby inside her is restless and she is exhausted but she keeps walking to this unknown place.

Dusk approaches. She knows it'll be dark soon and she should definitely be getting back, but she isn't sure what'd she'd be going back to. By now she knows that they all know she is missing and according to the stories she's heard it was this type of disappearing act behavior that led to her accident in the first place. The accident that stole her memory from her. They'll be mad. Probably really mad. Her mother will yell at her and what can she do but take it? It was reckless and stupid for her to leave, especially when she is in such a delicate situation, especially since she refuses to admit to herself. 'Be more careful', it's not a hard concept to grasp unless you're Lorelai Gilmore.

So she walks on. Déjà vu all over again.

Luke will be disappointed, she thinks to herself. Disappointed that she ran off without a word and disappeared out in the big wide world. Most days she can look in his eyes and see his adoration for her but some days she sees him looking at her like she is a stranger. When she acts out especially. She hates getting that look, but this time she knows she deserves it.

And Rory.

She isn't sure what Rory will do or say, or if Rory will even find out. She remembers when she was in the hospital and Rory hardly left her side and now she has hardly seen her at all since she has been home. She wishes for something…anything, that will give Rory her mother back. Give her that connection back. She can feel it when she reads those journal entries and when she looks at old photographs. This strange recollection type phantom of a love for someone she doesn't remember ever meeting. It breaks her heart trying so desperately to remember but coming up with nothing.

She begins to wonder how long until they find her as she comes up upon a long abandoned property. The roof is stained in patterns of black all over and she can almost hear the sirens in her head as she realizes this place must have burned down. She closes her eyes, unknowingly feeling the same trepidation she felt when she first appeared before this same place over twenty years ago. Her feet begin to move and Lorelai finds herself getting closer and closer to the mysterious building but it's like she can't stop herself from being pulled in as if a this set has a gravitational pull on her.

In her chest, her heart is racing faster. She steps up on the porch and something tells her to stop. This building clearly was set on fire a long time ago. There is no telling how architecturally sound it is now. But as dangerous as it looks there is also something safe about it. A feeling deep inside her telling her that she has finally made it home.

Satisfied with her journey for the day she sits down on the old wooden steps and takes a long look around. Her skin chills a little. Goosebumps appear on her arm the same way that had that night.

_It was cold. The little bundle she had wrapped up tight in a blanket slept comfortably against her chest but the thin jacket she had chosen to wear was clearly betraying her against the wind. She moved closer to the place fearfully. Uncertain of what the next stage in her life was and if this was it, she swallowed her nerves and moved up the wooden steps to the entrance._

_She'd heard some men on the bus talking about the Independence Inn and how much they'd enjoyed their stay the last time. When she'd gotten off the bus and saw that the bakery was still open she decided to make her way there to find something to eat for herself and her infant daughter. She met Fran._

"_Just passin' through?" the old woman who owned the bakery asked as Lorelai sat down with a squirming little blue eyed baby in her lap._

_Lorelai looked up after a second of silence realizing she was the only other person in the restaurant so the woman must have been talking to her. "I- I'm sorry?"_

_Fran laughed. "I've lived in this town my whole life. I'm sure I'd remember eyes like yours."_

_Lorelai smiled and Fran brought over a cookie and gave it to the baby before taking a seat at the other side of the table. "So are you just passin' through?"_

"_Oh," Lorelai began a little startled by the friendliness of the woman. "I'm honestly not sure yet. This is just where the bus let us off." Fran could see the fear in her young face and nodded._

"_Well you know if you're looking for a place to stay there is an inn just a couple miles down the road," she offered._

_Lorelai's face brightened. "Really? The Independence Inn right? It's that close?"_

_Fran simply nodded. "Yes ma'am. Just talk to Mia and tell her that Fran sent you."_

_The old woman gave the baby another cookie before loading her young mother up with goodies for the trips and watched them leave._

_And there it was. As she opened the door and stepped inside she could feel something change in the air around her. The apprehension was gone. She had made it. _

_Lorelai didn't know it before but now that she was standing in the entrance to the place that was her future. She eagerly stepped up to the front desk with a new mission. It wasn't just a room for the night that she was after anymore. "I'm looking for Mia," she said confidently to the kind faced woman behind the desk._

"_I'm Mia," the woman responded with a hospitable smile. "What can I do for you?"_

_This was it. The moment that defined everything and shaped her into the woman and the mother that she'd become. "I'm looking for a job, any job." She was home now._

By the time the sun begins to set Rory feels as if she has looked just about everywhere and is starting to lose hope. She looks up and sees Luke walking towards her. "Did you find her?" she asks, her voice just as small and panicked as it was the night Lorelai was in the car accident.

"No! I looked everywhere. Everyone has seen her but no one stopped her and no one knows where she is now."

Rory sighs. "Same story here."

"Did you check The Crap Shack?" Luke asks.

Rory nods. "First place I looked."

"What about the Inn?"

"Yeah I looked there too. Sookie said Jackson saw her and were going to follow her but they got to talking and he lost her so the Inn was a complete- " Her eyes suddenly get big.

Luke sees the look but Rory continues to say nothing. "What is it Rory?"

"I think- I think I might know where she went… maybe."

"Where?" Luke asks in the same state of panic as his would be step daughter.

Rory takes another second to think. It's definitely a long shot to go there but they'd looked everywhere else. She looks at Luke. "Just get people together. Kirk, Babette, Taylor, Andrew…Anyone that will help and double check everywhere! No matter what, we have to find her. Okay Luke?"

He nods. "Yeah. Okay. Right." He turns away from her forgetting about his question, in a hurry to get help and find Lorelai.

Rory turns around and starts off towards the old Inn. Walking past the stores and shops a wave of familiarity comes over her and her walk becomes a run. She remembers her father's words from the day after her mother's accident. "Gilmore Girls don't run," he'd said. Now it only makes her laugh. He doesn't know them as well as he thinks he does. Gilmore girls did run on certain occasions. They ran away from deviled eggs, they ran to Luke's on donut day, they ran around the gym at the dace marathon, and they always ran to each other. Always.

This wasn't any different. It felt different because maybe the roles were reversed a little. Lorelai had dedicated her life to her daughter. Sacrificed and went without so that Rory could have the best she could offer her. She grew up far too young so that she could guide her daughter through this crazy world and now that Lorelai had lost her way Rory felt as if it were her responsibility to guide her back. Back home. Back to her memories. Back to herself.

Rory down that old dirt road she remembers the walks they used to take into town and her trips to school from the inn when she was a little girl. She remembers them playing out in the field when Lorelai wasn't working and feeding the ducks in the pond even though they really weren't supposed to and she misses these things. Her run slows down to a walk as she begins to reminisce.

"_Mommy!"_

_Immediately after she was called Lorelai felt a tugging at her night shirt and a pulling on her shoulder. _

_"Mommy!" the five year old said again. She had no choice now but to open her eyes, roll over and greet her. _

_She rolled on her side and gave herself a minute for her eyes to adjust before looking over at her young excited daughter. "Hi." The child beamed. _

_"Hi," her mother croaked out in return voice still very think and heavy with sleep. Lorelai sat up. Being worthless in the morning before her cup of coffee she tried to wake herself up a little more by stretching and rubbing the sleep from her eyes. Rory however immediately pounced from the bed to the floor and ran over to the dresser. She opened a drawer and began tearing through Lorelai's clothes. _

_"What are you doing Sweets?" Lorelai asked still squinting thanks to the sunlight streaming in through the window of the potting shed. She wondered what time it was as she began to look around for her clock. _

_"School!" the five year old cheered excitedly. "I go to school today!" She jumped on the floor and ran over to her mother taking her hands and trying with all her childish might to pull her up. "Come on! Get up! Let's go!" _

_Lorelai smiled a little, let go of her hands and laid back down pulling the covers over her head as she went. "Five more minutes, Mom," she groaned. _

_Rory hopped back up on the frantically pushed her mother off. "No Mommy, get up now!"_

_"Okay, okay," Lorelai conceded picking herself up off the floor and untangling herself from all the blankets, while the child ran back over to the dresser. The young mother forced herself up and went to join her daughter. "Find anything, Munchkin?"_

_The girl grinned holding up a T-Shirt for her Mom to see. "I wanna wear this one!" she exclaimed excitedly._

_Her mother couldn't help but laugh and raise an eyebrow. "Rory, you wanna wear my Chico and the man T-shirt? Are you sure?"_

_Rory nodded and began bouncing up and down._

"_Are you really sure Sweets? You have lots of pretty clothes…" _

_"I know!" the girl said. "I wanna wear this!"_

_Lorelai smiled and couldn't help but wonder what her mother would think if she could see them right then. "Alright!"_

_She pulled out a pair of blue jeans and helped Rory into them then sat her up on a stool so that she could brush her teeth while Lorelai got dressed herself. Having the morning off Lorelai pushed past her maid's uniform and put on something more comfortable. _

_After they were both dressed she helped her little girl pack her Barbie backpack, with the folder of forms Rory needed for the first day and the lunch she'd packed for her the night before. She helped her daughter into her book bag and then smiled at her. "Are you ready?"_

_The little girl grinned up exuberantly. "Yup!"_

_"Good." They joined hands and Lorelai led her daughter out of the potting shed. She took her to the in and paraded her around for the other maids that worked there and more importantly for Mia, all of which whom had known Rory since she was a baby and in Mia's case had served as a surrogate grandmother to the little girl. After both mother and daughter got a little breakfast from the kitchen they left the inn and walked down the long dirt road towards town and the elementary school. _

_"Mommy?" Rory began as the two neared the large building. _

_Lorelai looked down at her. "Yes baby doll?"_

_"What do I say if someone asks me my name?" she asked clearly perplexed. _

_"You know your name," her mother returned just as confused if not more. _

_"I know but I have two, remember? If someone asks me do I say my name is Rory or Lorelai Leigh Gilmore?" she inquired innocently._

_It all became clear for Lorelai and she giggled. "Oh Sweets," she started with sigh. "You can say your name is Lorelai but you are called Rory." _

_"How come no one calls you, Rory?" she asked with curiosity radiating from her eyes. _

_"What?"_

_"Your name is Lorelai too!"_

_"Oh… well yes. You're right but Rory is a nick name… don't you think it would be kinda confusing if we were both called Lorelai or both called Rory?"_

_"I guess," Rory agreed with a nod as they approached the door of the kindergarten building. They passed a collection of children and parents saying goodbye in front of their class rooms but Lorelai walked Rory all the way in. _

_"You ready, Sweets?" Lorelai asked smiling proudly. "This is it. Do you have everything you need?" _

_Timidly Rory looked around at all the other children then back at her mother and nodded. _

_"What's the matter Baby?" _

_"Are you going to stay with me?" she asked in a small shy voice. _

_Her mother pulled her in to a hug. "I'll stay as long as you need me to," she said._

_Rory pulled back and found Lorelai's blue eyes. "Promise?" _

_"Pinky promise!" Rory said holding out her little hand pinky finger. _

_Lorelai put out hers too and let Rory take hold of it. "Pinky promise," she repeated before standing up she looked around and saw Rory's name on a cubby in the corner. "I think we can put your things in there, Sweets." _

_Rory walked over and took her book bag off. As Lorelai hung it up a woman approached them. "Good morning," she said cheerfully. "I'm Ms. Right." She said to Rory and smiled at Lorelai then looked at the cubby. "You must be Rory." _

_Rory looked at Lorelai and then back at her teacher. "Yes. My name is Lorelai but I am called Rory." She said it just the way her mother had told her to. _

_"Hi Rory." Ms. Right laughed. "Do you think you might like to go play with the other children?" _

_Rory looked out across the class room and while all the kids looked friendly enough she wasn't used to other kids. All she'd ever known was her mother, Mia, the other maids, and the inn. She shook her head not even sure how to approach another child. A few seconds later a little Korean girl ran up to them. "Hi!" she said happily pushing her glasses up on her nose as they seemed to be a bit too big. _

_Rory smiled shyly, "hi." _

_"Wanna come color with me?" She grinned. "I got a new box of crayons! I'll share."_

_The little Gilmore girl looked up to her mother for encouragement. "Go on, Sweets, have fun," the woman urged. "I'll be right here until you tell me I can go." She then watched nervously as her daughter ran off with her new little friend. _

_"I'm Lane," the girl said. _

_"I'm Rory," she replied as they picked a table and Lane spread out her crayons across it._

_For a moment, watching them Lorelai felt like she could cry. She stood there keeping her promise as many of the other parents around her began to dwindle out. After a while Rory turned around. "Mommy, you can go now if you want to," she said happily and with a confidence that made her mother's heart soar and crumble all at the same time. She sighed excitedly disappointed and blew her baby a kiss as she made her way towards the door._

Rory can see the outline of a person sitting on the steps and her heart nearly jumps out of her chest. She breaks out into a run again. "MOM!" she screams.

Lorelai looks up startled and realizes after a second that it's Rory galloping toward her not some crazed fiend.

"Mom!"

Lorelai slowly and painfully pushes herself up into a standing position. This could go one of many ways, she thinks to herself, but what the young woman does had not even entered her mind as a possibility. Rory throws her arms around her mother nearly knocking the both of them over. Lorelai struggles to keep herself balanced but Rory doesn't let go.

"Rory-" Lorelai starts planning on asking her what she is doing and why the theatrics, preparing to go off about how she just needed some time to herself and that she is fine and can take care of herself but before she can say any of these things the hug ends, Rory pulls away almost violently and cuts her mother off at the start.

"What were you thinking?" she asks rhetorically of course. "Do you realize that Luke and I have been looking for you for hours? Hours, Mother! What could have possibly been going through your mind that you thought sneaking out of the house, stealing Grandma's car, and wandering all over town was a good idea… You could have been hurt! You could have died! Not to mention the hundreds of other things that could have gone wrong between the two."

This is more like what Lorelai had been expecting and she knows she deserves it. However there is a part of her that doesn't want to hear it. That part that tells her she doesn't need to be lectured especially not by her own daughter.

Rory goes on. "Not to mention you're pregnant! How could you be so selfish?" She huffs. "I mean you're always going on about how Grandma and Grandpa suffocated you when you were a kid. Well if this is how you acted I would have kept your ass on lockdown too! Luke and Grandma and I, we're all at our wits end. We can't all supervise you constantly it's impossible. I mean if you wanted to go out all you had to do was tell someone. We're all so happy to have you back. We almost lost you Mom, do you realize that? You almost died because you pulled a stunt just like this. If you wanted to go somewhere why didn't you just ask?"

Lorelai doesn't know how to respond. She wants to say because she thought they'd say no but that sounds stupid and juvenile now. She shrugs from a simple lack of response.

"Is that it? After this wild goose chase you're just going to shrug at me?" She sighs completely exasperated and emotionally drained. She sits down on the steps and puts her face in her hands. After a minute Lorelai sits down beside her.

"How did you even get here?" Rory asks. "This place burned down almost four years ago."

"I don't really know," Lorelai tells her honestly. "I just started walking and this is where I ended up….I like it here….feels like home."

"It is home," Rory says. "But it's just one of many. The Crap Shack was home too… So is this whole crazy town. Home for me is wherever you are Mom."

Lorelai doesn't stop her from calling her mom. She is actually starting to like the way it sounds. "I don't know what to say…"

Rory looks over at her, most of the anger and agitation now completely gone from her face. "I'll make you a deal. If you promise to never do this to me again. I'll take some time and give you the grand tour of the place. Everything and everywhere until you want to stop and go home."

"Really?" Lorelai smiles.

"Yeah. Not today…today is over. Or tomorrow. But soon. Maybe this weekend. I promise."

"I'm sorry- " Lorelai starts. "For running off like that. I just wanted some fresh air and I knew I couldn't walk all the way to town. Honestly I'll be surprised if I am able to walk at all after this… But I was mad about the nurse thing. I just feel like so much is out of my control. It's frustrating. I don't mean to lash out or cause problems. I'm just making a giant mess."

"This is going to take some time for all of us to adjust to. I hope one day you do remember but the fact of the matter is you may never get your memory back. You may never be the woman we all knew before again… so instead of trying to force it," Rory says sadly, "we should work on creating new memories. Building a new relationship."

Lorelai nods. "Okay."

Rory smiles then pulls out her phone and calls Luke.


End file.
